Medicine and the practice of it is a very serious business. Every time a doctor
gives an opinion, the medico concerned has to be ready to back it up with some
serious facts. Some parts of medicine can be downright depressing, they are so
serious.
Take for example, that group of doctors who become Forensic
Pathologists. These people do not even get the chance to have a joke with their
patients. No, their consultations are done in the cold sterile environment of
the autopsy room. As a result of all this seriousness at work, most doctors seem
to develop a wicked sense of humor and I was sent some examples of this, taken
from court proceedings. These made me chuckle, especially as there appears to be
a life-long antipathy between doctors and lawyers, although I must admit I did
meet a great lawyer in Australia, I just can’t remember his name...
Anyway, here’s a few from the records:
Q. Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead
people?
A. All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
And the second one,
Q. Do you recall the time you examined the body?
A. The autopsy started around 8.30 p.m.
Q. And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A. No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was
doing an autopsy.
And the last one,
Q. Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you
check for a pulse?
A. No.
Q. Did you check for blood pressure.
A. No.
Q. Did you check for breathing?
A. No.
Q. So, then it is possible that the patient was alive
when you began the autopsy?
A. No.
Q. How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A. Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q. But could the patient have still been alive
nevertheless?
A. Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
practising law somewhere.
Humor is actually a very important part of life and in fact
you’re dead without it. But jokes aside, laughter really is the best medicine.
People who know how to laugh, at themselves as well as at others, do have a
better outcome than those who do not. Even with such death sentences as some
forms of cancer, you will do much better with a happy, positive, laughing
approach to life.
One person who really knew this was a chap in Australia who,
once he found he had a terminal illness, held his own wake before he died. In
this way he felt he could say goodbye to all his friends, rather than have them
drinking over his cold corpse after the funeral. Bizarre perhaps, but I can
understand his macabre sense of humor!
No, learn to laugh, read humorous books, watch funny videos,
hang around with people who tell great jokes and suddenly you will find that
life just seems that little bit better. And you’ll live longer too! Now, have
you ever heard the one about the doctor and the actress?
Here’s some more:
In Hospital Waiting Room: Smoking Helps You Lose Weight ...
One Lung At A Time!
The Demon drink:
When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking...
I Gave Up Reading
And another:
My Grandfather Is Eighty
And Still Doesn’t Need Glasses....
He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.
And for the UFO fans out there:
The Surest Sign
That Intelligent Life Exists Elsewhere In The Universe Is The
Fact
That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.
