What happens with too much Singha, Jerry

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Dear Pedal (sic);

You often criticiZe people for mispelling words.  Don’t you realiZe that things are different here?  TIT: This Is Thailand, e.g. There is a travel shop on S. Pattaya Rd. promoting trips to ‘LOA’.  Want to go?  Also, the PM had a big pre Xmas dinner advert for a restaurant for only 400 ‘BATH’.  (Odd exchange.)  Congratulations to my newest “WOW” member, “Waiters On Wheels”.  My campain (sic and OMG)…..to change Pville to “WOW” is working.  See Noi!  I didn’t cheat on you.  KOTW,

Singha Jerry

Dear Singha Jerry,

Have you seen a doctor for your problems recently?  That is certainly one jumbled up email ending up in KOTW.  I researched this acronym (that’s what they call a combination of letters, my Petal, and I came up with:

KOTW King of the World (gaming),

KOTW Keepers of the Wang (World of Warcraft guild),

KOTW Kiss of the Whip (BDSM),

KOTW Knights of the Winnebago (World of Warcraft guild),

KOTW Keeper of the Wampum (Mic-O-Say, Heart of America Council, Boy Scouts of America),

KOTW Kisses on the Wind.

A little hard for me to work out which one you meant, but Keeper of the Wang might go close.

You have also appeared to have missed the fact that Pattaya Mail works on American English, and that is why I “realize” that you can get confused.  Native Thai speakers can be excused when they get confused about “baht” and “bath” (I checked with the editor and that’s how the advertisement wording was sent over, Petal, and we have to stick with what the client sends in), but native English speakers cannot be excused, so that is why I will not forgive your “campain” at all.  It is “campaign”, Singha Jerry, even when viewed through the bottom of a Singha beer bottle, consumed outside on the steps of the 7-Eleven.  And unless my memory is failing me (which at my age it is allowed to), the food delivery people Waiter on Wheels was operating long before you got your drunken tattoo of MOM, while standing on your head, so that it turned out WOW when you walked out the door.  Far from claiming success in your “campain”, you have merely copied what was already here.  You have an English saying “People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.”  I think you should remember that.