Is this my prince?

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My Dearest Hillary,

How I have pined for the touch of your hand while I lay in my sick bed in London.  The doctors couldn’t work out what was wrong with me – but I knew.  The Pattaya Mail wasn’t delivered that week, and I was beside myself worrying about you.  Please make sure they deliver the Mail each week, Hills my Poppet.  Thanking you in advance.

Geoff

Dear Geoff,

If only I had known my Petal, I would have dropped everything (well, nearly everything) and flown to London to be with you.  Next time, let me know and send the plane ticket, wrapped around a bottle of Veuve Clicquot and I will be with you in 12 hours (plus drinking time).  It’s a long way, better make that a half dozen (and please make sure they are cold).