How to date a “Pretty”

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Dear Hillary,

When you go to any function here in Thailand, there are always some fabulously pretty girls as hostesses or promotions girls.  How do you get to know these girls?  Can you just bowl over and chat them up, or what?  I’d love to be seen with one of these on my arm.  They’re almost too delicious to be true.  My mates at home wouldn’t believe it if I could get a piccy with one or two of them.

Kendrick

Dear Kendrick,

What sort of name is that, my Petal, that your parents lumped you with?  They must not have liked you very much, I fear, but I’m sure you’re over it now and don’t hold grudges.  Well, I hope not anyway.  But back to your lusting after the “pretties” you see at functions.  Yes, they are very pretty, and they are chosen for the position because of their looks.  To look as immaculate as they do, most of them will spend a couple of hours before the function on make-up and hair styling.  (Not like me, I can bolt out of the dormitory in under three minutes, but then I’m not a “pretty” am I?)  You see, Kendrick, these girls are employed to be hostesses and promotions girls.  That means they are paid.  It’s their looks that they are selling.  That is their job, and they have to do it well, or they don’t get another gig.  So now you know how you end up with one or more of these “pretties” on your arm – you pay for the privilege, Petal, and you may even find that most of them don’t speak English.  They are there for their looks, not for language skills.  And you will pay a lot more for the photo opportunity than you would on Walking Street, Loi Kroh, Nana or Cowboy.  And the girls from Walking Street, Loi Kroh, Nana or Cowboy can at least speak English, such as “Hello sexy man!” if nothing else.  That’s on top of “Welcome” and “Sit down please.”  Amazing linguists some of them.