Heart to Heart: October 9, 2020 – October 25, 2020

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Perennial Miss Write

Dear Hillary,

I’ve read all the books, listened to the wise advice from the old hands, and still I get stymied in my attempts to find these elusive “good women” that you talk about.  Just where are they?  I don’t see any beating a path to my door, no matter how open I leave it.  Where or what am I supposed to do next?

Big Al

Dear Big Al,

The first thing you have to do is close the door.  “Good” girls don’t walk around the villages at night, looking for open doors.  They leave that to the “good time” girls, and that whole scene is a little doubtful, in all aspects, Big Al.  Finding your soul mate needs you to go to where such creatures hang out – not waiting by your door, waiting for them to chance by.  It is time you got off your Big A, Petal and worked out where these girls come from, and where you can meet them in a social scene.  One very easy way is to go to parties and BBQ’s put on by expats married to Thai ladies.  Let the hostess know that you don’t have a partner, but would love to meet a nice Thai lady, and she will let all her eligible friends know.  The next step of course depends upon whether you are really ready for a relationship yourself, and whether or not you are really a butterfly.  Thai ladies are not going to spend time with a time waster, no matter how clever or rich you think you are.

Really, Big Al, the dating situation is just like in your own country.  You meet ladies in a social environment, and eventually someone goes ‘click’ with you (and her)!  The trick is in finding the right social environment.  If the environment you inhabit is the bar scene, then you end up with a bar girl, and paying for the privilege.  You won’t find the financial stakes so high looking for the good ladies, but it will take time and effort (on your part) before you get to meet Miss Right.  In the meantime, I remain here waiting in my attic, the perennial “Miss Write”.



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Pack up and leave

Dear Hillary,

I am working in the Middle East and before Covid, I came here regularly for many weeks at a time. On these trips I generally find that there will be a very suitable young lady who will indicate that she would like to take care of me, and a suitable (financial) arrangement can be entered into. The problem is, one young lady is trying to tie me down. How do I get her to understand that this is not a lifetime relationship, just a few weeks, and when I go back to work I will want her to leave the condo and take all of the things that she has managed to bring over in the last two weeks?

Sandy Sam

Dear Sandy Sam,

You have just found out that you can’t have your cake and eat it too! She has been taking care of you, so now you must take a little care of her and her feelings. Now is the time to spell it all out, my Petal. Tell her to take her things and go – but sweeten it with a suitable financial donation.




Beware, that’s not ketchup

Dear Hillary,

I don’t know if you answer ‘food’ questions, but here goes anyway. I have seen people eating what looks like an egg ‘parcel’ with meat inside it. They cook it in the wok and fold the egg over like wrapping a flat square object. What is it? And would it be too spicy for someone like me who is a little afraid of spicy food? I really do want to try but I am just a little afraid to go in and point!

Spicy Sue

Dear Spicy Sue,

I am sure you are referring to a Thai omelet, called ‘kai yat sai’. Generally it is pork based, but you can get chicken as well – ask for kai yat sai moo (pork) or kai yat sai gai (chicken). When it comes to the table it will have a little bowl of red ketchup – but beware, it is chili, not tomato! Around 50 baht at most food carts. Enjoy!