“Divorce” payments

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Dear Hillary,

I’m not one of your heart broken people.  I’m delighted that my girlfriend has said she wants to go off with some German chappie she has met, promising to take her to Germany.  I don’t care if he’s real or not.  We’d been together three months and every day the hand was out for more money and more money.  She is a good lookin’ babe, but so are lots of others.  Should I give her something as a “going away” present, or just let her take her things and disappear to Germany?  I put nothing in her name or anything stupid like that.

Jerry

Dear Jerry,

You’ve just escaped, Petal.  You were not together long enough for her to have any real hold on your belongings.  Help her to go over to the German boyfriend she is looking for.  B. 100 for the motorcycle taxi should be enough.