HEADLINES [click on headline to view story]:

Girls were not forced to hand over the money

Look what they did to my car

Caring about the environment

Pollution-Solution

Taking the Mickey?

Girls were not forced to hand over the money

Dear Editor;
Andrew Owen chastised me in last week’s Mailbag for taking 20 baht sponsorship from my bar girl friends for running the Pattaya marathon. I did originally say that not running for a local charity did embarrass me but I take his point. Don’t feel too sentimental about the girls Andrew. Even they could afford 20 baht. Let me assure you that the vast majority of the money was raised by family members and other Burnley fans so where I ran was somewhat irrelevant.
It is worth pointing out that the girls were not forced to hand over the money and the cash certainly did not end up with a ‘profit making company’ as he states. If Burnley FC were profit making we wouldn’t have to sell our decent players and might stay near the top of the Championship ... which we won’t.
A group of Burnley fans have raised £10,000 for the youth team which is a fantastic effort.
If any of the youth team make the grade and prove to be good players no doubt they will be sold on.
I’ll ask for a refund and donate it to a local Thai school.
Nigel Oakes

Look what they did to my car

Editor;
Subject: Holidaying in Pattaya could be seriously damaging to your street cred!
Attached is a photo of a Mr Stuart ‘Melvin’ Harper’s car (he hates his middle name by the way), who left it with a good friend to have it serviced and valeted.
Stuart is well known by many in Pattaya and I’m sure he would appreciate you sharing his photo. You could imagine his face when Mr Fitz got picked up from his jovial parents in his new look vehicle.
Andy

Caring about the environment

Editor;
His Majesty the King is famously-renown for his well planned initiatives regarding the environment. Why is it that the majority of citizens (urbanites especially) don’t do more to respect their own personal environs around their homes, or the country at large?
Many areas throughout the Kingdom are disrespectfully strewn with rubbish. A lot of such places lie outside of the zones which local municipalities employ street cleaners or garbage collectors to clean. Needless to say, they are left untouched and untidy. (Un Thai-dee).
I have asked friends why elementary school students aren’t taught to identify and separate rubbish according to its composition as is done in more developed countries (i.e. glass, paper, aluminium-steel, and plastic-polystyrene). The usual answer is that this would inevitably put a lot of uneducated people out of work. Those people need to go through bins to find some piece of rubbish which they can sell in order to eke out a living.
This way of thinking might make it kind of acceptable for people to let rubbish lay where it falls, but what about the rubbish which can’t be easily resold? And does the government condone people who mightn’t necessarily work legally? The general public seems to tolerate scrap collectors sympathetically as if to say, well at least they’re not begging.
Is society doing itself any favours by justifying slovenliness? Does society actually think that there are people who aspire to scavenging through rubbish in order to make a living?
Is it not possible that with the proper forethought, municipalities would be able to gainfully employ the people (who depend upon rubbish) to clean other areas of the country that lie outside the municipalities’ normal zones? In order for this to be achieved, the government would have to be financially supportive of the municipalities.
Strangely, rubbish could be sort of likened to a good Thai meal. A great Thai meal consists of a wonderful blend of different tasting dishes. Yet, put all of those dishes together in the same bowl, and all that you have is fit for pig-swill. Rubbish that is not separated is good for nothing. Yet rubbish that is separated can be reused and/or recycled.
How long will it take for the government to acknowledge that if they want to truly support His Majesty’s environmental initiatives, it has to implement a programme in which people learn to Reduce, Re-use and Recycle? If children started to learn in schools what effect rubbish has on the environment, and how to recognize and separate rubbish, it would ensure that people gradually start to treat the Kingdom’s environment more respectfully.
Litter Bugged (Pseudonym)

Pollution-Solution

Dear Editor;
Those of us who give back to this beautiful earth in which we all live will reap the harvest throughout our lives. The joy that goes with being part of the “solution” is priceless. It’s a win-win situation. It’s called “waster-sizing”.
All we need to do is bend at the waist to pick up the waste and get rid of both.
It is time for all of us to do our part. “Carpe diem”, if we don’t who will? Don’t wait for our neighbour, reach out and pick up something! Way too many people are trashing our earth and we need to set examples by picking up trash where we see it. Do not get mad at the people who trash, just pick up and they will start to understand.
The rewards are many, Lord Buddha will thank you, as God, your children and all living creatures. It doesn’t matter where you come from or where you are, it’s where you’re coming from that matters. Take a look at yourself, take a look at your surroundings and see what you can do to improve this beautiful earth in which you live.
It’s not too late - it’s up to you.
Plastic or fiberglass from cigarette filters are just a few things that are trashing and killing much of our sea and land life. Did you know that it takes many years for the fiberglass in cigarette filters to decompose, and many are eaten by unknowing wildlife?
Is it a bad idea to try to leave every place just a little bit better than when you arrived? We need your help and you need ours. Let’s pull it together and make a difference during our time on the only place we know. We are always open for new ideas on how to do a better job – with a little help from our friends!
We, here at “Pollution-Solution” would like to start a Litter Art Contest with prizes donated by local businesses. Everyone would receive a certificate for participation in the first “Annual Pollution-Solution Litter Art Contest”. Our first challenge here is at Jomtien Beach and will grow from there.
Look out Thailand - things are picking up!
Join the fun, engage yourself and make your mark!
The life of the people is in the land.
Pollution-Solution: Just do it!
Thank you very much, Mahalo Nui Loa!
Gerry, Fun, Pukie and Game

Taking the Mickey?

Hi there Editor;
I was fascinated with the letter you published regarding the immigration department from one Arthur Lee Gordon.
In amongst the pearls of wisdom there were some very peculiar bits of advice and it took a few minutes to suss out The Honorable Gentleman was throwing in a few Mickey Finns amongst the sensible advice.
I must agree with the opening ‘Three chaiyos to the immigration dept for the very courteous and professional treatment’.
I have found exactly the same ever since they moved to the new premises in booming Jomtien, no more ‘Something for meeeee’s to speed things up’; the new boss seems to have a firm grip on every department. 4 chaiyos to him!
No 1 makes sense, ‘Visit the Immigration Dept a few days before, pick up the right forms and verify exactly what is required.’ However, be aware that if you are informed you need 2 copies of everything, on the day they will only require one set and vice versa. No problem either way; there is, as before, a triple the price of anywhere else photo copy shop at hand should you have been foolish enough to go for the ‘one copy of everything’.
I was a bit perplexed by edict No 2: ‘Wear a suit’ which smacks a bit of Charlie Chaplin complete with bowler hat, walking stick and spats. Why not go the whole hog and add an unlit cigar butt and perhaps a revolving bow tie!
No 3 makes sense, like shaving, not smelling of alcohol and bringing originals of all documents. The ‘Use a briefcase’ seems a bit over the top to me.
No 4: ‘Upon arrival wai everyone in uniform’ seems a bit Queenie to me, although ‘Speak softly and politely’ is not a bad idea. Doing all three, AND having a briefcase could fuel suspicion that one had an explosive device in the briefcase which could cause a bit of a delay for everyone who was there at the time.
But on getting to No 5: ‘When tending your documents or fee payment use the traditional Thai polite way of offering documents by offering the documents in the right hand while the left arm supports the right forearm’. Pleeze! There you go again Arthur Lee Gordon, throwing in a piss-take. Why not throw in a smile and the odd wink as well, go the full mile!
No 6 makes sense: ‘If a problem arises don’t make demands for a supervisor. Much better to say something like “Oh well, I might have made a mistake. Can you please tell me what we can do about this’. That could be applicable to dealing with any government department, not forgetting the telephone and electricity companies or when a baht bus rams you which is patently his fault but being a Farang you are automatically in the wrong. In the latter case just smile, pay up and remember the “Khaam dii pai, Khaam dii maa’ - what goes around comes around and the baht bus driver will get his comeuppance someday whilst you, on the other hand, have been unfortunate to suffer your comeuppance somewhat sooner, not uncommon for a Farang in Thailand.
I sometimes wonder why we all love living here so much until I think of, and read how things are ‘Back There’ and I know exactly why we all love living here so much. Thailand is the most wonderful place in the world with fewer ‘warts and all’ than most other places.
Best wishes
Richard Walton

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