Pattaya Prowl: Is Pattaya full?


As the world forgets Covid, Pattaya hotels are apparently 80 percent full. To judge from the traffic at weekends in particular, it seems like 150 percent. Pattaya smog is obviously exhaust-related and not connected with burning rubbish or forest fires. Meanwhile the Tourist Authority of Thailand wants to double the number of overseas tourists in 2019 (40 million) to around 80 million by 2030. Koh Larn is so busy some days that there’s a limit on the number of boat passengers over there. Hotels and hostelries are crying out for more staff.

The expanded U-tapao airport, near Rayong, is now hosting thousands of new passengers every day and many (if not most) seem to be heading for Pattaya. The queues at Jomtien immigration can be offputting to say the least, whilst it takes a month or so to arrange the renewal of your driving licence at Land Transportation. The number of new Pattaya bank accounts being opened by foreigners is growing so fast that one manager half-jokingly suggested that Thais might be in the minority soon. It’s great to see Pattaya doing so well, but who is monitoring the consequences?

֎ A notice on a Pattaya massage shop says no service available for customers with blood pressure, heart trouble or prostate problems. Must rule out almost all the local expats.

֎ The Hollywood bar, Soi 6, has a warning that smoking or drinking at the pool table will cost you one horn pull. Horns are noisy but are whistles and bells any less so?

֎ Government figures say inflation is now hovering modestly around 3 percent per year. Has anyone yet told the good news to supermarkets and restaurants?

֎ A lot of comments received about lady gogo dancers with tattoos beginning to appear in the clubs. Is that a turn-off? Most punters say yes.

֎ Sex hasn’t been the same since women starting enjoying it. That’s according to the US grump Lewis Grizzard.

֎ Need extra large shirts or trousers? Try Nuanjan Shop in front of Avenue Mall, Second Road. They don’t come any bigger.

֎ Boyztown on Second Road promotes choices: left or right, cabaret or male show, cool beer or a Coke, Thai food or farang. The shows begin nightly at around 10.30 pm.

֎ Thailand spent a total of 444 billion baht to counter the coronavirus over the past three years. Let’s hope there isn’t another outbreak.

֎ George Burns said it was hard for him to get used to changing times. He remembered when the air was clean and sex was dirty.

֎ Heard in a restaurant. I’ve been married so long, I’m on my third bottle of Tabasco.

֎ By the end of the expanding year there’ll be no fewer than 242 McDonalds’ cafes in Thailand. Now you know tourism really is rebounding.

֎ There are already 300 retail outlets or cannabis products in Pattaya alone. How many of them are actually making a profit?

֎ Job vacancies all over Pattaya. So many businesses are crying out for staff including Outlook Mall which has taken to advertising on Facebook.

֎ A reader asks where to find Persian cuisine in Pattaya. Try Cafe Le Mar on Beach Road (next to Cetus).

֎ Exotica Bar on Sexy Soi 6 is holding a School Girl Party on Friday 17 March, starting 3 pm. School is out early it seems.

֎ The lack of rain must be becoming a serious issue. The cloud seeders are out in force again.

֎ Ben’s Theater Jomtien presents Here is Iris, a Dutch comedian show, on Sunday March 19. Tickets 700 baht by email.

֎ Horseshoe Point is holding a cricket march on Sunday 19 March at 13.00. ICC versus Marine CC.

֎ Rolling Loud, the American hip-hop music festival, premieres its first Asian offshoot April 13-15 at Legend Siam theme park.

֎ Zsa Zsa Gabor said she was a housewife because she always got the house in her divorce settlements.

֎ Should Facebook ban all photographs of what you have eaten (or intend to eat) for breakfast? Worth thinking about.

֎ What’s the point in restaurants providing extra toasts when you are so mingy with the butter and jam?

Happy Hunting!