The lover in the laundry


Dear Hillary,

I think I have a problem, which is going to bite me on the bum. My local laundry has started to deliver my laundry, instead of me picking it up. That should be good, but the delivery lady is hinting that she wants to be with me. She wants that we go to dinner somewhere and she will take the sheets to the laundry the next morning. If I were 30, this might be a great deal, but I am much older and she’s no spring chicken either. The pressure is every day now. How do I gently get rid of her?


Dear Watson,

You don’t need Sheer-luck homes to fix your problem. All you have to do is tell her that you are going to have a pool party next weekend at 3 p.m. Invite a few mates and tell them to bring their girlfriends and that the party starts at 4 p.m. She will be so embarrassed being caught naked by a bunch of guys she will scamper off and not invite herself into your pool again. Tell her that you will pick up your own laundry because you are getting a dog to stop people coming in, and she will get the hint. If you are supplying champagne at the party remember to invite me as well. No skinny dipping though, my Petal.