Look out for crocodiles

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Dear Hillary,

With all the publicity recently about crocodile attacks and you have a farm for them in Pattaya, should I take my 64 year old mother to the animal park attractions when she comes on holiday later in the year? My husband says I am worrying unnecessarily. What do you think?

Worried daughter

Dear Worried daughter,

I am so pleased to meet someone who thinks so highly of their mother, but I am with your husband, I’m afraid. The likelihood of crocodile attack is very much less than her chances of being hit by a Chinese satellite falling out of the sky or being run down by a London bus. Relax. No guarantees about baht busses however.