Jack Sparrow, swashbuckling hero


Dear Hillary,
I’m coming your way in December. What are the safe bars to frequent in Pattaya? I don’t want to be ripped off. I’m told you’ve got to be careful in any go-go bar, but what about the bars out in the suburbs? What happens if you’re still there after official closing time? I’ve got a few more questions, but they can wait till closer to my trip. My lodgings are out in the western country, and nothing like Thailand (I was over once before a couple of years ago).

Dear Capt. Jack,
You are the timid one, aren’t you, nothing like Capt. Jack Sparrow. There is no way I can give you a six month in advance bar forecast. Bars change weekly, some daily. Just use common savvy, Petal. If a bar is empty, then you can say that it isn’t the most popular one, can’t you? If it is thumping and full of people, then it is popular. There’s many bars more than go-go, with sports bars, music bars, family hangouts and more. Just tread gently, go slowly and you’ll be OK. If you’re still there after closing time, don’t worry, the staff will put you right.