Isaan “cooking”


Dear Hillary,

I have a problem with my wife’s cooking. It’s not that she’s a bad cook or anything. She does a mean sausage, egg and chips these days, and even has a go at toad in the hole. So you think I should have no complaints. It’s not her British cooking that’s the problem – it’s when her girlfriends come over and they start cooking that Isaan stuff. The really, really, really bad smelling stuff. Honestly Hillary, when I walk in the door of the house I get hit with it. It’s so bad I come close to puking. She knows I hate the smell, but she does this at least twice a week. It puts me right off my food as well. What should I do? She’s a great woman, other than the Isaan cooking.

William, but they call me Bill


Dear William, but they call me Bill,

This is an easy one to fix, my Petal. All houses have a back door, and Isaan food should be cooked outside. Most homes that foreigners live in have two kitchens – one indoors for the sausage, egg and chips and the other outside for the Isaan, where the pungent smells just waft away with the afternoon’s breezes. The one outside is called the “Thai kitchen” and does not get used for toad in the hole, either.