I am thinking of having an affair with one of the girls at work

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Dear Hillary,

I am thinking of having an affair with one of the girls at work.  She is obviously up for it and gives me all the right signals, but is discreet enough, so that nobody has guessed that we have sneaked away for some fun and excitement.  Only problem is that I have a live-in Thai GF and even though she seems OK with me going out on my own which I do a couple of times a week, I don’t know just how she would take it if she found I was with another woman.  Your understanding of this type of thing is much better than mine – I don’t even understand western women, let alone Thai ones!

Living on the edge

Dear Living on the edge,

Have you ever heard the phrase ‘Cut it off and feed it to the ducks’?  It happens frequently, Petal, and I’ll leave you to guess just what “it” is.  You can always get the duck to cough it up, or make it into a duck stew, but Thai women have even more inventive methods of disposing of the “it” which has been visiting where “it” shouldn’t.  The vegetable food processor makes it all pretty final.  So if you want to run the risk of having to sit down to wee wee, just keep going.  Lots of luck in finding “it”.