First and last with a good girl


Dear Hillary,

I am tired of your bleating on about “good” girls. I decided to take your advice and dated a good girl I was introduced to at a party. Exchanged phone numbers and sent Line messages back and forth, so then took the plunge and invited her to dinner. She turned up late, with the usual traffic excuse (they never think of leaving home a bit earlier than usual) and I offered her my arm as we walked to the car. You would have thought I had rabies or something. Dinner was OK, small talk was very small, and when I escorted her to the car, again not received well. Dropped her back to her car and no earthly chance of a goodnight kiss, let alone anything else. Next day more Line messages, so I said I would like to be naughty with her. The reply was “Not yet.” What does that mean? The last “good” girl I took out said we could get together at the end of the year. This was in January. I’m only 56, but I can’t wait that long for a friendly snog and see what eventuates. I might have died. Hopefully in the arms of a short time lady I met that afternoon!



Dear Wilson,

You are getting your wires crossed, my Petal. Short time ladies have no interest in a future with you, unless you show her a bank book with several millions in there. The “good” girls are looking to the future, so creep up slowly, to avoid making mistakes as this union is for life. You, on the other hand, are looking for a bar girl who looks and acts like a good girl, so you can go to dinners and private parties. Make up your mind, Wilson. If you are looking long term then be prepared to wait. Otherwise stick to the local short time ladies.