“Family” allowances

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Dear Hillary,

What is the score over here?  I have been with my Thai GF for around three months, but now she is asking for regular money “to send to Mama”.  Now I happen to know that her mother has a good job, so why am I expected to just send her 20,000 baht every month?  I sort of get the feeling that I am being played for a sucker here.  I already give the GF 20,000 baht every month, so how come it suddenly doubles?  Surely if she wants to send her mother money, she should do it with her money, not mine.  I’ve asked a couple of the guys at work and they say it’s pretty common, and it is up to me to decide if the girl is worth it.  Can you put me (and the guys) straight?

Jerome

Dear Jerome,

You have a saying in English that goes “fools rush in where angels fear to tread”, and I think you’ve been doing some rushing, without doing the homework first, my Petal.  Is the girl’s mother caring for children?  Most probably her daughter’s children, your Thai GF?  How did you come up with a figure of 20,000 baht a month for the girl?  Did she ask for it?  Does she work, and if she doesn’t, why not?  Jerome, you have known this girl for a whole three months and here you are flashing the cash as if this is a long established, sound relationship, with shared responsibility as far as finances is concerned.  And what is this “worth it” nonsense?  We’re not talking about a car here.  We’re talking about human relationships.  Get out of there Jerome, before you make more silly mistakes.  You are not ready for a steady relationship.  Stick with one night stands.

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