Buy me cola, Teerak

Get Rich Quick.
Get Rich Quick.

Dear Hillary,

I have noticed that all the girls in the bars all come out with the same small talk, “Where you come from? You have Thai wife? Buy me cola, Teerak. You pay bar for me?” Makes no difference what bar, they all come out with the same spiel. Do they teach small talk at school or what? Is it a special tutoring college they are in? Wondering

Dear Wondering,

Wonder no more my Petal, Hillary is going to let you in on a closely guarded secret. They all say the same things because they are all singing from the same hymn book if you like. The book they use is called “Get Rich Quick English for Bar Girls.” This very small book has all the answers and topics to lead the new bar girl straight to the Holy Grail (the foreigner’s wallet). The price on the cover is B. 135, though my informant said you can buy it for B. 50. Mind you, since there was no page with “How much for this book?” or the more expected “Buy me book Teerak” (substituting ‘book’ for ‘cola’) and she was still on page 2 of English vocabulary, this may not be the correct price.

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