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Mail Bag |
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Beginning of forever
Editor;
What can stop a nervous but happy groom from attending his marriage
celebrations?
Bangkok traffic can. What was to be a 1 ½ hour drive turned into 3 solid
hours of despair, transpiration and depression. My wife is a good driver,
but that doesn’t help when you are hopelessly stuck in traffic, moving at
the average pace of 15km per hour at best. I tried not to look at my good
friend Lars. The silence in the car said it all. We were going to catch the
one and only flight to Sakon Nakhon, to attend the Buddhist ceremony at 7
o’clock sharp the next morning. Mr Lars kept his calm, or perhaps he was in
a trance. Ehum, do you have a plan B? Not the most stupid question in my
life, but close. At this stage we were sitting upright as if it made the car
go faster. We made it - at least we thought so - but where to park? My wife
did the pocket parking of her life, and the rest was running the stairs and
through corridors.
We checked in with 4 minutes to go. Hey, what we do now. Like 4 minutes
would be an eternity. That was my second stupid question of the day. A quick
look at the nervous wreck next to me, told me it was beer time.
Both Lars and I are veterans in marriages. These horrific, expensive, time
consuming events where you have to be mentally and physically at your best -
because the gruesome truth is that you are the center of the insanity. You
have to perform and look good, which is a thought that is growing in you,
and finally take completely over, becoming a monster in your brain.
Why couldn’t we just have gone to that office and signed some papers? No Mr.
Lars, this is to honor the beautiful bride, her family and most of all show
them you are a man. Something like that must have gone through the nervous
groom’s brain - judging from his somewhat unusual pose, bending forward with
his head between his hands for the entire flight. Not easy, with seatbelts
on. Anyway, luckily we did the hardest landing ever - (without breaking the
undercarriage) that could have woken up even the dead. We were in Sakon
Nakhon.
Mr. Lars seemed to come to life, and when Peng arrived to pick us up, we
sort of slipped into a relaxing mode. This incredible girl was still looking
fresh and going strong, after what I could guess must have been almost a
week of endless preparations. Even the car was decorated. She had gone to
bed at 3 o’clock that morning. The girls went for a briefing, while Lars and
I got the permission to do nothing, which translated into some rather nasty
whiskies. Thank you Buddha.
The inevitable happened as the sun came up. I noticed my nice black pants,
that I last used in my own (Chinese) wedding, had a hole from a cigarette
burn. Disaster, but after arriving at Peng’s house - my self confidence
reappeared after seeing all the other guests in t-shirts and “come as you
are” outfits. Indescribable bunch of nice and down to earth people.
It was early morning, but beers on the table, and the whole house decorated
like a temple. It all started with the unmistakable sound of the monks.
Point of no return Mr. Lars. It was a ceremony never before seen. To go into
details would be longer than this story itself, but here is the essence;
only Thais can sit on the floor for hours on their knees or with legs
crossed. It’s an art that we foreigners do not master. Despite cramps in
both legs, it was the most beautiful ceremony I have ever seen, and it was
genuine. Parents accepting the groom, monks blessing us and we all got waist
bands (actually a thin rope) for good luck. It became too emotional for the
groom, and the production of adrenalin took over, resulting in severe
shaking. Not easy, when you are supposed to hang a gold necklace around the
bride’s neck. Lars went for the easy solution; just force it down over her
head. Needless to say that was a fiasco, so it had to be the traditional
way, opening the lock - and then lock it again as soon as it was in place.
Miraculously he managed at his 6th attempt. If you would have given Mr. Lars
a cup of coffee at that point, he would not have been able to drink it, as
it would all have ended up on the wall.
Then it was the casual aftermath with all these nice people of all
categories enjoying the moment and the nice morning. I started to get
desperate for some liquid, and grabbed a bottle of water. Peng noticed, and
came to my rescue with a beer. That’s how she is by the way; mysteriously
efficient and responsible. From that point onwards, nothing could stop me. I
started to really enjoy the company of all these odd people, and the wedding
as a whole. Go for it guys, what’s next? We had some breathing space before
that session, which was a marvelous dinner party at a really nice restaurant
somewhere in the bush.
Aha, a big stage with huge loudspeakers, microphones and the whole shebang -
including 2000 watt lights. Just down in my third beer, something caught my
eye. Mr. Lars was at the stage with Peng, probably to thank for the bride or
something. He must have been taken up there by force. Just looking out at
the sea of people is scary enough. Microphone in his hand and light in his
face, but nothing came out. It suddenly dawned upon me, that I was his best
man. Rescue under way. Probably the fastest speech I have made in my life,
while jogging up to the stage, but not difficult (it was more difficult when
Lars married the same girl for the second time). Lars has a big heart was an
appropriate beginning. We got away with it. Huh, then it was the rest of the
dinner while trying to figure out how to stop the dancing party which had
evolved into an odyssey of happy Thais. I was throwing down GT’s as if they
were going out of fashion. My big concern was that Lars had to say something
after all, so I invented this game between us, whereby the winner would be
the one that could say the most Thai words. It got very short as you can
imagine, as we only know 5 words each, but mission accomplished. We were on
the stage, and Lars grabbed the microphone - loud and clear he was thanking
everybody, including Buddha. Amen.
Then we had to go back to the hotel, and discuss how that really happened.
Early next morning the strong desire for a cold beer came upon us. We were
not flying before late afternoon, so what. These cans are too small, so we
added up a few, while my wife had to go “for a walk”. Peng, smiling as usual
woke me up at the airport. You are here, go check in.
Thanks for a fantastic experience Lars and Peng, and it is definitely the
beginning of forever.
Tor
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You are a thinker
Editor;
Re: Boring and repetitive (PM Mailbag Friday, 04 July 2014) - Let me see if
I understand this. Until a study is completed that meets your standards, I
am forced to breath in your cigarette smoke? Wow, you are a thinker.
Dana
Intercity train system
Editor;
Re: State Railway improving Sriracha-Sattahip tracks for faster, heavier
trains (PM Friday, 04 July 2014) - And when will we be able to get a fast
and reliable intercity train system on the Eastern Seaboard? It will be very
profitable for SRT, but the politicians must allow them to invest in fast
DMUs.
Swensen
Centrelink have direct access to immigration database
Editor
Re: Must live in Oz to receive age pension (PM Mailbag Friday, 04 July 2014)
- Centrelink have direct access to the Immigration Department’s database.
Centrelink are alerted the very minute each and every social security
beneficiary leaves Australia.
Bangsean Man
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HEADLINES [click on headline to view story]
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Beginning of forever
You are a thinker
Intercity train system
Centrelink have direct access to immigration database
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