Dear Hillary,
I have been reading your column for the past 3 years, always enjoy your answers and this time it’s me looking for some answers.
I am 40, and met this girl about 1 year ago that’s in her very early 20s. Not an issue, because I am not one of the grey-haired golden oldies on pension that enjoys spending their pension the way they have always dreamt of.
Of course, as with many of them, she works by night and prefer to take her beauty sleep during the day. That worked for me, I travel each week to Pattaya to work for a stable, well paid income that can take me to my happy retirement some day. At the same time, for the companionship I provide the support in small quantities based on the going-rate for companionship.
Of course, I am not the only companion but understand that everybody has a job. Over months, she managed to rank in changes to her mom’s home in extend of 300,000 baht, landed a massage shop of over 100,000 baht and upon enquiry, it seems that there were about 3 other companions in tow since the beginning of this year, one very old but rich married guy, 2 mid year olds, each providing for very well paid salaries each month on top of these luxuries, she has it made but when I found out and asked (I was hoping that I would have been told before asking but that is not always the norm I believe), she said that there are no feelings for these people, they are a job and she needs the money. She is not a big spender and as in every family, relatives are being taken well care of hence the salaries that are coming in handy on top of the well being of an increased bank balance each month. She said I am the one she loved and want to have a life and family with and hence the no cost asked of me, the good thing is that I believe her, but at one point in time, there was a demand from the one guy to drop all other companions or the money stops... she tried with me but according to her the feelings of love has exceeded the feelings for money... however, demands are coming in now for getting (renting) a condo and next year buying a home (in her name most likely she says)... and then the fun will start I guess.
She is currently having a visit from the one companion that provides the ridiculously high lump sums, so I can’t visit her shop for this month, but she still visits me at every opportunity. That must be real love for now from her.
My dilemma is, how long will this real love last before the love for money and a single life time well paid for will outweigh the love?
I am not sure if I should move on or tag along and see where it ends up... it’s mixed emotions and next year may see a new story unfold... as she herself said, who knows what will happen?
Desperate

Dear Desperate,
Yes, I did shorten it (a lot), but do you know what a sadist is and a masochist is? In simple terms, a sadist is someone who is nice to a masochist, and you, my Petal are a prize winning masochist. She must certainly be some woman, with four of you on the lead at one time. And you don’t have a dilemma - get out of there now and forget the sweet nothings she is whispering in your ear - that’s if you’re allowed back in the house after Mr Moneybags has had his fill and she has filled her wallet. Run!

Dear Hillary,
You may think I’m stupid, but I recently found out that my wife has been cheating on me. This really floored me at the time, as there was no indication as to what she was up to. I decided to give her a chance, as this was the first time she had done something like this. We spoke about how lies kills a relationship, and she was her old sweet self again. I thought how lucky I was to have been able to save the marriage. Then in the middle of it all, the loving dinners and together photos, I caught her at it again. Same guy. Same story. Please forgive me. I thought about it for a few months, wanting to go back to how we were, and then I found out she was also cheating on him, as well as me! What is it with these Thai women? Have they no honor? Are they raised to infidelity? You’ll never catch me in a (im)permanent relationship with one ever again. A friend of mine said it’s better to rent than to buy, and I think he’s right.
Disappointed

Dear Disappointed,
I do feel sorry for you, my Petal, but you probably don’t believe me either, and I don’t blame you at all. It certainly must have been a shock for the chap she was seeing behind your back, to find he was being cheated on too! Don’t rush into anything, and let time be the healer.