Dear Hillary,
One of my co-workers, I work in a rather small company, is a real pest. He’s not breaking a finger at his work, but he manages to boast around that he’s the one and only who gets something done. Customers, who don’t know the real side of the story, keep calling him, inviting him, believing he’s the most important man to talk to in our firm. Usually, he leaves all the work, at least most of it, to other people for he himself is to busy running around and showing off, usually forgetting to pass on messages and me and my other co-workers will get blamed for it at the end. Our boss knows all about it, sometimes he’s very angry himself but as it turns out, he’s always on the guy’s side, he is a friend of him, for whatever reason.
I can say for myself and for my co-workers that we are all very dedicated to our company and to our work we are doing there, but, at the same time, fed up with this lazy s.o.b. and fed up with doing all the work while he takes the credit for it. If we mention anything to him, he reacts like a wet dog - he shakes off the water and appears dry and un-harmed. What can we do?
Sick and Tired.
Dear Sick and Tired,
You don’t know how well I understand your feelings. I, myself, had someone of his type working together with me at one time. Whatever you tell him, he will shake it off and, as you have mentioned, being a friend of the boss, always takes advantage.
Still, there has to be something done about it before it gets to be too much. The best solution would be to ask your boss to call a meeting and complain to him, in front of the guy, about all the problems. He’s got to give you an answer then. You’ll have to make it clear to your boss and the guy that working under those circumstances is rather frustrating. Maybe you should try to explain to your boss, even though he is a good friend with that guy, he still should treat all his employees the same way, recognize the work one is doing and give credit to that person who deserves it. Helping his friends is one thing, being correct another. Even as a friend, your boss cannot always close his eyes and keep silent about what’s going on behind the scenes.

Dear Hillary,
I am pregnant, I am very happy about it and I know already it will be a girl. What concerns me is the name we will give to the baby. Since she’s a girl, she most probably will change her surname later on, but whatever name we give her, she will have to cope with it for the rest of her life. I lean toward giving her an unusual name which you can’t shorten, my husband likes to stick with the usual. What do you suggest?
Mother To Be.
Dear Mother To Be,
First of all, congratulations to you and to your husband. You are right, your daughter will have to carry her name for the rest of her life. What you have to be aware off is, unusual names might cause some problems when she starts going to school. Kids like to have common names, on the other hand, as soon as they reach their teenage years, they might enjoy having a distinctive name. Try to avoid extremes and don’t take names that give you a date-stamp on your forehead, like ‘Boris’, which was popular in the 80’s and Farrah in the 70s. Never forget that people tend to make a nickname out of everything, for example: Belinda will be a ‘Linda’ or ‘Belle’ and Jessica will become a ‘Jessy’.
I insisted, since I am her god-mother, of naming my niece ‘Claudia’. No way to nickname it, it was out of fashion (Claudia Cardinale was famous years ahead) and it sounds beautiful. Check with calendars, or better in the Internet. They have programs and literature about it. In case you do not have your own computer, you can go to a computer shop or even a hotel with this kind of service.