Corner bends the laws of physics

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PSC Golf Bunker Boys at The Ranch

Monday, Jan. 4, Bangpra – Stableford

The monkeys were out in full force at the ever-popular Bangpra Golf Club.  They had obviously been spending a lot of time huddling in the bushes as young‘uns abounded.  Your scribe had the unfortunate luck of seeing his lunch eaten by Big Papa.  Damn monkeys!

Mike Corner was the star performer of the day, posting an outstanding 44 stableford points.  His play on the par-4 13th hole brought back memories of Sir Barnes Wallis’s bouncing bomb as Mike’s ball landed in the creek guarding the approach to the green and proceeded to bounce along the water, coming to rest on the green within a few feet of the cup.  Mike pocketed another par on his way to a magnificent 44 points.  Some guys have all the luck.  My ball would have sunk to the bottom reminiscent of the battleship Yamato’s destiny at the battle for Okinawa.

Tony Robbins.Tony Robbins.

It wasn’t a real memorable day for the BB’s as only 2 of 32 players were able to play to or better their handicaps.  Averaging just 29 stableford points, a lot of shots were left out on the course.

A Flight

1st Tony Robbins (18) 35pts

2nd Mashi Kaneta (15) 35pts

3rd Colin Greig (11) 34pts

B Flight

1st Mike Corner (21) 44pts

2nd Tim Winder (24) 36pts

3rd Mike Brett (19) 35pts

Near Pins: G. Buff Stuart, Bob Duxbury, Ken Ellmore, Ralph McConell

Wednesday, Jan. 6, Burapha C & D (blue tees) – Stableford

The C and D nines at Burapha are some of the more interesting tracks in the area.  For the average Joe – read typical Pattaya Don Juan – playing from the blue tees seems too long and from the whites too short: from the blues it’s damned if you do, from the whites damned if you don’t.  Perfectly accurate club selection and course management is imperative, but difficult.  Add to this greens that are a bit rough around the edges (“rough around the edges” is a euphemism for ragged and not running quick or true), untended bunkers, and bombarding gnats, and the result was a rough day at the office.

All this was attested to by every podium position in A flight being taken on count back, with a mere 31 points, and an overall stableford average of a paltry 28.

On this particular beautiful Wednesday afternoon, the powers that be decreed we were going to resign our fate to the damned if you do – blue tees – version of these enigmatic tracks.  MISTAKE!  The majority of our guys were close to revolt upon the realization we were playing six par-4’s of over 400 yards, two par-3’s of over 200 yards, and a hole – C9 – with a water-carry that would give Bubba Watson pause for reflection.  Later, back at The Ranch, it was decided the powers that be must wear blue body paint for the remainder of their golfing careers.

A Flight

1st Neil Jones (18) 31pts

2nd Derek Stephenson (10) 31pts

3rd Geoff Parker (13) 31pts

B Flight

1st Tony Robbins (18) 37pts

2nd Ken Davidson (25) 33pts

3rd Lee Butler (20) 31pts

Near Pins: Peter Platt, Lee Butler, Geoff Parker

Friday, Jan. 8, Pattaya C.C. (blue tees) – Medal

Many golf societies in Pattaya seem to be somewhat involved in area charity activities for the less well-off among us: This is good.  Your scribe would like to humbly suggest a charity drive for the beautification of Pattaya C.C.  Depending on the amount of funds raised, we could: resod some fairways turning brown to green, install vine covering lattice fences blocking out the unattractive surrounding barren fields, plant flowering shrubs and trees, and pave the dirt/pot-holed walkway between holes nine and ten.  We will leave the issue of greens on the back nine to a future fund raising event.

Many of our regulars participated in the PSC Championship leaving the field wide open for the nineteen BB’s that showed up to play the track with the beautiful clubhouse.  Frank Quinlan jumped on the opportunity to win B flight going away (net 68), outdistancing his closest competitor by 7 points.  Mike Brett wasn’t as domineering in winning A flight, but even with a couple of 7’s and an 8 he still managed to post a very respectable net 73.

A very hearty welcome back to an old time Bunker Boy – Peter Habgood.  Peter has suffered through some serious medical issues but claims to now be A-OK and immediately proved his point by claiming a near pin in his first round in weeks.

A Flight

1st Mike Brett (19) net 73

2nd Barry Murnin (17) net 75

3rd Tony Berry (13) net 76

B Flight

1st Frank Quinlan (29) net 68

2nd Peter Allen (29) net 75 cb

3rd Alex Kilcoyne (27) net 75

Near Pins: Peter Habgood, Tom McDowell, Alex Kilcoyne (2)

Note: The Bunker Boys is a PSC affiliated golf society that plays out of The Ranch bar on Pattaya 3rd Road (in front of the fire station, and almost opposite the Buffalo Bar).  We play on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, so if you enjoy a fun day out, and a friendly but competitive golf competition why not come and join us.  We meet at The Ranch at 9 a.m. for breakfast and transportation, and new players are always welcome.  Contact “Buff” on 086 046 5091 or 080 605 5663 for all enquiries or got to website: www.bunkersociety.com.