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Book Review: Modern Drunkard

by Lang Reid

I would imagine that around 99 percent of the readers drink alcohol, so this week’s book should have a wide audience appeal. However, author Frank Kelly Rich is appealing to those who more than just sip. As one of my friends, known to enjoy a tipple, once said, “I gave up drinking when they invented gulping!” This book is for the gulpers.

As subjects in the research for this book, I think the author observed all those who would venture out in the evenings wearing the T-shirt emblazoned with “I spent all my money on women and beer. The rest I wasted.” Sage words from that side of the fence!

Published by Riverhead Books this year (ISBN 1-59448-142-3) this is not a scientific treatise, but as the Los Angeles Times reported, “Modern Drunkard is an irreverent homage to the lifestyle of the chronically wasted, filtered through rose-colored shot glasses.”

The book is divided into seven main chapters, though much can flow on from one section to another. Author Rich has tried hard to delve into his subject, even coming up with the final chapter showing 365 reasons for getting loaded. For the gulpers out there, they don’t need 365 reasons, but it is fun for the rest of us to see how many we have tried personally. For example, on the 26th June 1819, the bicycle was patented, and you can celebrate that day drinking your favorite scotch and quoting W.C. Fields who said, “Scotch needs water like a fish needs a bicycle.” However, remember that on August 19th this is Burn, Witch, Burn Day dating back to 1609, as apparently the witches of Salem were accused of turning good beer bad. A heinous crime in most societies, but perhaps these days we would stop short of burning at the stake! The book suggests that this is the day to drink Frisky Witch cocktails, and very helpfully gives you the recipe, just in case your local bartendee does not have it.

In his rules for etiquette author Rich suggests that to make a party go well, the host should be several sheets to the wind. “The host’s foremost duty is to entertain his guests and there are few things more entertaining than an extravagantly drunk person attempting to host a party. Your inebriated state will put your guests at ease and encourage them to get as drunk as you are, which is the whole point of throwing the damn thing.”

In Great Moments in the History of Hooch you will find that in 323 BC, Alexander the Great drinks himself to death on his 33rd Birthday and the “I just kicked the entire known world’s ass” blowout!

The book is illustrated with period sketches, giving the book a Prohibition era feel to it. A great concept for a book advocating the exact opposite.

My copy of Modern Drunkard came from the Bookazine shelves, with an RRP of 575 baht. This book would make a good Xmas present for all your heavy drinking friends, so get one and give one now, before someone gives one to you! A good Xmas giggle.


  Mott’s CD review: Deep Purple

Rapture of the Deep

Pressed into rapture by Mott the Dog
Looked at deeply by Meow the Cat

5 Stars

‘Rapture of the Deep’ is Deep Purple’s eighteenth studio album in their long illustrious career which started in 1968 when they changed their name from ‘Roundabout’ to ‘Deep Purple’. The band did actually split up in 1976 before reforming in 1984, which, depending upon your view point, makes the band 29 years old or 37 years old!

During this time Deep Purple have become a bit like Triggers broom, always the same broom, but many different brushes and shafts. In their career Deep Purple have only ever had one drummer, Ian Paice, who has banged every drum on every album and every concert, making Deep Purple the complete negative image of Spinal Tap (in the Tap the drummer keeps on self combusting or dying in a nasty gardening accident).

In comparison, Deep Purple have had two bass players (although Roger Glover was fired once but came back), two keyboard players, four guitar players (if you count Joe Satriani) and five singers (if you count Glenn Hughes and take into account that Ian Gillan has actually been fired twice and rejoined three times).

This line up that recorded ‘Rapture of the Deep’ have been the same for two albums: the previous ‘Bananas’ (2003) and this magnificent album. In fact, apart from Don Airey replacing the retiring John Lord on keyboards the band has been stable for the last four studio albums, starting with ‘Purpendicular’ (1996) and ‘Abandon’ (1998).

‘Rapture of the Deep’ is probably the best album to come out under the Deep Purple banner since ‘Machine Head’ (1972). A bold statement I know, but then we are dealing with an extremely high quality album here played by a very fine bunch of musicians at the height of their collective powers. They have all been in the music business for forty years (apart from the young guitarist who is rapidly reaching that mark).

Ian Gillan is recognized as the voice of both Deep Purple and the hard rock genre. Apart from Deep Purple he has also lent his throat to singing the original lead part in Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webbers ‘Jesus Christ Superstar’, led his own band ‘Gillan’, ‘Garth Rocket and the Moonshiners’ and for one album was lead singer in ‘Black Sabbath’.

On bass is Roger Glover whose rhythm section with Ian Paice is good enough reason to keep Deep Purple on the road. Apart from his Purple bass lines Roger Glover has also played with ‘Rainbow’, produced several fine solo albums, and taken a turn at production work including such bands as ‘Nazareth’ and ‘Rory Gallagher’.

Guitarist Steve Morse, apart from winning guitarist of the year five consecutive times in Guitar World magazine, has produced many fine instrumental albums with his own band ‘The Steve Morse Band’ as well as holding down axe duties with ‘Dixie Dreggs’ and ‘Kansas’.

Behind the drums Ian Paice, whilst unemployed during Purple’s eight year sabbatical, played drums for ‘Whitesnake’ and ‘Gary Moore’.

Keyboard player Don Airey had previously played with ‘Colosseum 2’ and ‘Rainbow’. Mott the Dog is well impressed by their pedigree.

The first album by this combination, ‘Bananas’, was a fine rock album, but had a slight bedding down feeling. Now after the band has been together for two years you get the real deal.

The album opens up with some sinister Star Wars type effects from Don Airey’s keyboards, before the rest of the band come rumbling in as only Deep Purple can. It is not so much heavy metal as in music that is being held very tightly.

‘Money Talks’ is a perfect opener, as it has a rock solid rhythm section, good solos from Airey and Morse, and Ian Gillan is in fine voice. Ian Gillan is always at his best singing about the things he likes, and on this album he gets plenty of opportunity to sing about money, girls, drinking, and the absurdities of the world at large. One cannot help but smile as Ian Gillan opens up with:

“I was young and healthy,
Extremely wealthy, I swung in the trees,
And did as I pleased,
I thought I was rich,
Money talks to me,
Whispers in my ear,
Gives me everything I want,
Everything I want”
Well Mr Gillan I am glad for you that money talks to you, it always just sneers at Mott as it passes him by and goes onto Mrs Mott and the pups.

The album carries on in fine style without a filler track in sight. ‘Girls Like That’ expounds the virtues of the fairer sex, whilst Ian Gillan protests his innocence during ‘Wrong Man’, giving plenty of room for some fine instrumental jousting between the keyboards of Don Airey and the six strings of Steve Morse, the like of which has not been heard on Purple albums since the days of Lord and Blackmore on ‘Speed King’ from ‘In Rock ‘ (1970). The next time a Deep Purple greatest track album is put out, one of the tracks from this album that definitely has to go on is the title track ‘Rapture of the Deep’, an absolute Purple classic.

‘Clearly Quite Absurd’ is a thought provoking ballad with Ian Gillan speaking the words as only he can over a very fulfilling Purple backing which builds throughout the song, bringing things to a rousing conclusion. This is followed by three excellent Purple rockers that would get the most uptight foot tapping, including more jousting between Morse and Airey, whilst Ian Gillan lets go with some classic rock screams.

‘MTV’ is the sound of musicians venting their fury at ignorant journalists (the same way that Pink Floyd did with ‘Have A Cigar’ and Nazareth with ‘Telegram’). Ian Gillan plays this journalist rapping to a funky rock beat.

“Mr Grover ‘n’ Mr Gillian
You musta made a million since Frank Zappa caught fire
Could you tell us about it,
Keep it short and use my version,
Or everyone out there will think I am a liar,
We can speak about bananas for one second, just because I understand,
You have to get them off your chest,
But in the meantime while you are talking,
Could you do some more of these here ID’s,
And then the station might maintain some interest.”

‘Junkyard Blues’ is a good knock about rock song for the Purple boys to show off their wares where Steve Morse and Don Airey are invited off their group leashes, and allowed to solo at leisure, which is a perfect way to bring the rockin’ face of this album to a close before we are gently led off into the purple sunset by the lilting ballad ‘Before Time Began’, a fine way for a fine album to draw to a close.

The artwork for the album by Tom Swick is excellent, much better than the rather naff Bananas cover, and the album comes in a nice digi-pack case with a booklet. The music has been excellently produced in the studio by Michael Bradford, and it is nice to see that after all these years Bruce Payne is still at the reigns of the management. Keep on rockin’ Purple.

Musicians
Ian Gillan: Vocals
Steve Morse: Guitars
Don Airey: Keyboards
Roger Glover: Bass
Ian Paice: Drums

Songs

Money Talks
Girls Like That
Wrong Man
Rapture Of The Deep
Clearly Quite Absurd
Don’t Let Go
Back To Back
Kiss Tomorrow Goodbye
MTV
Junkyard Blues
Before Time Began

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