HEADLINES [click on headline to view story]:

Family Money

Snap Shot

Modern Medicine

Heart to Heart with Hillary

A Slice of Thai History

Bits ‘n’ Bobs

Personal Directions

Social Commentary by Khai Khem

Women’s World

Family Money: “Leaving on a jet plane...”

By Leslie Wright,
Managing director of Westminster Portfolio Services (Thailand) Ltd.

So you want to be a carefree expat.

Are you sure you’ve tidied up your UK tax situation? In common with many overseas tax authorities, the UK Inland Revenue assesses tax status and liability on a case-by-case basis according to general principles - and it can get complicated.

Regrettably, most offshore IFAs are not qualified to give expert tax advice to UK domiciles, let alone other nationalities! Some offer simplistic solutions - “Put it all into a trust” - which may be fine for some, impractical for others.

For instance, you can’t readily transfer real estate into a trust - and certainly not the villa in Ibiza or Phuket. This would have to be sold to a company first and the shares assigned to the trust - which may generate capital gains tax, not to mention complications with the bank if you’d mortgaged the property - not to mention the problems that might arise later if the heirs wanted to divide or sell the property, only to discover that Thailand doesn’t recognise offshore trusts, and an offshore company cannot own real estate (other than a condominium) in Thailand.

Unless your situation is very simple, and your UK holdings minimal, it is generally best to deal with the UK IRD through a professional tax adviser such as your UK accountant - who himself may have little idea how offshore investments or trusts work. You may well need more than one experienced professional to guide you through the ramifications.

In any case, the IRD should be informed in advance of your departure by completing form P85 to declare that you are going. (A range of guidance leaflets and forms may be downloaded from the IRD website, www.inlandrevenue.gov.uk)

If you’re away from UK for less than a full tax year (6th April to 5th April) you will remain liable to UK tax. To avoid tax on your foreign earnings and income, you must be non-resident in the UK for at least one complete UK tax year, as discussed in the IRD’s guidance leaflet IR20.

And no matter how long you remain non-resident, you’re still liable to tax on income derived in UK, such as property rentals, dividends, etc., which should be declared in an annual return.

Banking & Finance

Many expatriates arrange their financial affairs around two bank accounts. They have a local bank account to fund day-to-day living expenses in the country they are living in; and a secure offshore bank account in which to receive salary payments and in which to accumulate savings, or keep their cash reserve.

Since the introduction of international anti-money laundering regulations, you can no longer march into a country with a suitcase of cash - as many expat residents of Pattaya once did. If you transfer a significant sum of money into the country where you are going to live, for example to buy a property, this may have tax implications. Keep all records of the inward transfer and of what you then do with the money.

In Thailand, for instance, you can only get Central Bank of Thailand permission to transfer money out (except for trivial amounts) that had previously been remitted in - and to your own bank account (not the girlfriend’s.) Nowadays, your local bank may ask what any inbound remittance is for, and issue you with a Tor.Tor.3 certificate if the money’s going to be used to buy a condo, or a Tor.Tor.4 if it’s for other purposes.

Planning an Investment Strategy

Living as an expatriate can be an opportunity to build up wealth. However, not all the investment opportunities you encounter will be right for you. Never let greed blind prudence. A prudent investment strategy would be to start by building up a cash reserve in secure offshore high-interest accounts.

As you develop your expertise, you may become interested in other opportunities, including offshore funds investing in a range of markets and different types of asset. For many capital investors, buying units in funds through tax-efficient collective investment vehicles such as offshore insurance bonds is the simplest and most flexible way to go.

In any case, you should take professional advice before you commit your money to anything new. If you are reluctant to make your own investment decisions, one option is to use a specialist portfolio-management service.

Your UK Tax-Efficient Portfolio

If you have pre-existing ISAs (individual savings accounts), you may continue to hold them while you are non-resident for tax purposes, but you may not make further ISA investments until you resume UK residence.

You would be similarly ineligible to invest in most other UK tax-efficient investments while you are non-UK resident. For instance, you may not be able to keep up UK tax-efficient pension contributions while you are overseas.

Depending on the period you expect to remain offshore, it may be appropriate to invest in offshore savings plans - either open-ended or for a fixed term - to make up for this. But remember to discuss the long-term tax-efficiency of any such plan with your IFA before making any commitments.

UK Property

You can sell your UK property, or find tenants to rent it, or leave it empty. If you sell, you liquidate an asset that might otherwise be a worry. The proceeds can be reinvested in a flexible offshore tax-efficient vehicle which could be conservatively stanced for safety - for instance, an offshore insurance bond holding only money-market funds, with-profits, property and TEP funds, rather than higher-risk funds which could lose value in a market downturn.

If you rent out your existing UK property, you might use a property manager to find and manage tenants, collect rents, pay bills such as property insurance, and forward mail. One useful contact might be the Association of Residential Property Letting Agents (ARLA).

As mentioned earlier, you are liable to tax according to income tax rules on rents you receive from your property, which should be declared to the IRD. Full details of the Non-Resident Landlords scheme can be found on the IRD website.

It makes sense to insure your property adequately against the usual risks of fire, flood and theft, but also against tenant damage and vandalism - and this should be done before your departure.

Ensuring you’ve clarified and tidied up your tax situation will enable you to enjoy your life as an expatriate with one less worry.

Snap Shot: Phame as a Photographer!

by Harry Flashman

Any camera owner who has ever read any photo books or magazines will have heard of famous photographers who are still remembered for their art. Names like Ansel Adams, Henri Cartier-Bresson, Irving Penn, David Bailey and Joel Myerowitz spring to mind, but you can add David Hume Kennerly to that list. Now I must admit I did not know of this chap (who is still very much alive, by the way) until my photographic friend Ernie Kuehnelt brought him to my attention.

Photo by Henri Cartier-Bresson

Turns out that Kennerly is a Pulitzer Prize winning photojournalist who has covered 8 presidential campaigns in the US and shot 35 covers for Time and Newsweek, which are 35 more than you or me. However, what brought him to the fore was a project he did in the year 2000. His goal was to record world life and culture, especially in America that year. To do this he travelled across 38 states and 7 countries, taking black and white photographs. One a day!

The diverse shots, and they are truly diverse, from shots of his sons looking at his broken leg, to a vacant parking lot in South Carolina, have been put together into a show which is on display in the celebrated Smithsonian Institute in Washington until December 29th this year (you can still get there if you hurry).

Now the article this week is not to get you to book a flight to the US of A, but is to show you that by having a project you can produce a body of work that can become an important work of art and even make you famous.

If you don’t believe me, try this. A lady decided that on her birthday she would have a photo of herself taken in the nude. She was in her early 20’s from memory, and now, 30 years later, she is still doing this project. Every birthday, a birthday suit picture! Medical science got to hear of this and it turns out that this is the only existing record of personal aging in the world, to span such a distance in time. We all have photos from our teens over which we wince when we see them and compare them to how we look now, 10, 20, 30, 40 years later or whatever. But do you have the intervening shots? And one a year, catalogued? Of course you don’t.

So what can you do to get yourself into the annals of photographic history? The answer for the average photographer has to be a progression of some type. This photographic work stands on the fact that you are recording something happening over a period of time. It is not a body of work that exists because of its great photographic technique.

Now some of these have been done before, but here are a few ideas to get you started. Record a flower opening and closing - one shot every hour during the daylight. Place them side by side, in order from the left, and you have just made a photographic statement. (By the way, it must be from the left, because we read from left to right, unless you are into some Arabic or Chinese writings.)

Did you ever see the film “A Zed and Two Noughts”? In it they recorded, by serial photography, the decomposition of once living tissue, dogs, cats, etc. The finale was the “stars” arranging time-lapse photography of their own demises. You could extend your flower shots to include the birth and death of the flower. Again, this would be an interesting piece of work that would really tell a story.

So can you see where I am headed? A temple from dawn to dusk, a mountain taken every day for a week, a baby every day for a year. The subjects are only limited by your imagination. Let it work over time and give you a photo project to work on. You never know, you could end up being exhibited in the Smithsonian Institute.

Modern Medicine: Have you got piles? And I don’t mean money!

by Dr Iain Corness, Consultant

Piles are one of the most common ailments around. Embarrassing and often a pain in the bottom, to coin a very apt phrase! The medical term for Piles is Haemorrhoids, which shows why we don’t commonly use that name - too long and too hard to spell! I have often said that the reason that the medical course is 6 years is that it takes 5 years to learn how to spell the long words, but then, I’m joking of course.

So just what are piles and do you get them from sitting on wet grass? Let’s deal with the grass first. You do not get Piles from sitting on anything, be it grass, newly mown or otherwise. End of the grass story. Piles are simply ‘varicose veins’ of the anus. You see, around the edge of the anus there is a very rich plexus of arteries and veins and it is possible for the veins to become distended and eventually form a grape-like structure that can even protrude from the anus itself. A classical “Pile”.

The biggest problem with Haemorrhoids is acute bleeding. Embarrassing as mentioned before, but can actually be such as to run you out of iron and you end up anaemic. Other symptoms include local soiling, discomfort and prolapse. You can also get a thrombosis in one of these protruding piles that can be very painful indeed. Ask anyone who has ever had one (or two).

There are lots of theories as to why we get haemorrhoids. Many women feel that they are the result of pregnancy or straining during childbirth, but since men get them as well that would appear to shoot that theory down in flames. A lack of dietary fibre has also been given the nod as a cause, but personally I am not convinced, as many people with great fibre diets still get Piles. Constipation and straining at toilet does appear to have a bearing, but I honestly feel that the real reason relates very simply to our stage of development in the history of mankind.

My theory (Darwinian, I admit) is as follows - we used to walk on all fours, like all the other quadrupeds. Look at our first cousins, the monkeys, and they are still wandering around with knuckles in the dirt, but many moons ago after seeing our reflections, we decided we looked better standing on our hind legs, so we learned to walk erect. This was fine, other than the fact that the valves in the veins in our legs and ano-rectal region were not up to the additional pressure the column of blood was exerting from the heart, now a metre or so higher than the valves. Straight out hydrodynamics.

Fortunately Piles are relatively easy to fix, and the common rubber-banding technique will be successful for most. The only real danger in this condition is in ignoring the bleeding, thinking, “It’s only piles.” As mentioned before, this bleeding can lead to anaemia, but the biggest problem can be the fact that rectal bleeding might just be a symptom of cancer, and not haemorrhoids, and it is possible to have both complaints.

The answer is to never ignore bleeding (from any cause) and get your doctor to check. It may be embarrassing - but it could be life saving.

Heart to Heart with Hillary

Dear Hillary,

Recently I was walking to my favourite bar when the skies opened up. I was ducking in and out of doorways trying to dodge the rain. Outside a tailor shop my wet shoes slid on the shop’s ceramic tiles and I totally lost my balance. I reached out and grabbed hold of a portable rack of neckties in an attempt to steady myself, but I crashed onto the tiles with a pile of gaudy coloured neckties falling on top of me. I must have hit my head because for a moment I didn’t know if I was in Thailand, tile land or tie land. The tailor came out of the shop gesturing wildly with his hands and shouting at me in his native tongue. Why can’t shop owners use non slip tiles in their premises, am I under any obligation to wash or pay for all those ties that are now just a soggy mess, and where in Pattaya can I learn the Indian language so that I can interpret what the tailor was yelling at me?

Mighty Mouse

Dear MM,

You certainly do seem to bring trouble on yourself, don’t you, Petal. Now you are getting tied up with Indians and wondering if you should learn another foreign language and cement more ethnic ties, or was that get the ethnic cement off the ties? The first aspect of this problem is tied in with where you were walking. You should know by now that footpaths outside tailor shops are for displaying gaudy shirts, wind cheaters which say JAG - UAR or FER - RARI and the aforementioned racks full of ties. They are not for walking on, and even if it is raining that is no excuse. Now as far as your problem with getting tongue-tied when discussing family ties with Indian tailors, this is not a huge setback, as they all speak Thai. So try Thai regarding the tie. There you are Petal, I’ve really tried for you this time!

Dear Hillary,

I am getting married in a couple of weeks to a wonderful Thai girl who has never given me any problems like all the ones I read about in your column Hillary. However, the other day she asked if I minded if some of the people from her village called in to see her, so I just said OK, but when I got home there was about two dozen of them all over the house, in front of the TV, lying on the settees, sitting on the steps and drinking beer. If they had said excuse me or something like that I would not have been so annoyed, but they stayed there for two days before they went back. Every night I had to pick my way through all the bodies. I really cracked up in the end and they left. Now my girlfriend is sulking and she is giving me a hard time, because I raised my voice in the house. Do you think I was being unfair, Hillary? Or is my girlfriend being unreasonable? I think I really have to clear this up before the wedding, so can you answer quickly. If it costs some money for a quick reply that’s OK too.

The Groom

Dear Groom,

Costs some money? Costs some money? How dare you, young man! I will have you know that there is complete transparency in all of Hillary’s dealings. Money? I do this column as a service to the readers, not as a way of gaining income. (Anyway, the old skinflint’s salary he gives me wouldn’t even keep me in one box of chocolates and a bottle of beer a month, let alone champagne! Not that I am hinting, mind you!) So back to your pre-event problems. All sounds a bit like Groom’s Fairy Tales to me. Are you sure you are not suffering from cold feet? It is quite normal, you know. You should also have known by now that this is normal behaviour in Thai families, and that is what you are joining. You live in Thailand, you are contemplating marrying a Thai and you will be responsible for all of the family’s needs, be that feed, water or money, or even medicine for the buffalo. This is expected, as well as showing that you have ‘jai yen yen’ (a ‘cool’ heart). Your fianc้e is upset that you have not shown jai yen yen, even more than she is upset at your not welcoming her village people. I think you have to groom yourself a little more before becoming the groom, Mr. Groom.

Dear Hillary,

I have noticed that you are always telling the foreigners who write in that they should learn the Thai language. Does that include the writing as well? I wonder if this is really all that necessary, as in all the bars I go to the girls speak English and in hotels it is easy to find people who speak English, don’t you agree?

English Ernie

Dear EE,

Try driving around up-country and reading the (Thai only) road signs if you don’t think it is important to read Thai. As far as speaking the language is concerned, wait till you are fluent and you will find out what the girls in the bars really think of you after the usual welcome, “Sexy man, sit down please!”

A Slice of Thai History: The rise of Ayutthaya Part Two 1395-1448

by Duncan Stearn

Ramesuan died in 1395 and was succeeded by his son Ramaracha. He launched an invasion of western Cambodia and campaigned fairly well in the region before suffering reverses and being expelled in 1401.

In 1400, Sai Luthai, the ruler of Sukhothai, took advantage of Thai operations in Cambodia and seized the key centre of Nakhon Sawan.

Ramaracha was overthrown in 1409 and Intaraja acceded to the throne of Ayutthaya. He successfully intervened in a succession dispute in Sukhothai in 1410, reasserting the suzerainty of Ayutthaya and captured Chiang Rai in an invasion of Lan Na to support a rival claimant to the throne of Chiang Mai. However, he was repulsed from Payao and Chiang Mai in 1411.

However, he did compel Sai Luthai, the ruler of Sukhothai, to accept Ayutthayan sovereignty in 1412.

Intaraja died in 1424 and his two eldest sons fought a duel to determine the succession, but both were killed when they were thrown from their elephants and so their younger brother Boromoraja II took the throne.

He continued Ayutthaya’s aggressive foreign policy, attacking the crumbling Khmer Empire, laying siege to the capital Angkor in 1430. The city fell to the Thais in 1431 by way of treachery after a seven-month investment and was sacked. The Thais carried off thousands of captives as well as sacred royal items and statues and transported them to Ayutthaya. Just over 100 years later when the Burmese invaded Thailand the Cambodian statues and royal items were taken in booty back to Burma.

Despite the loss of their capital, the Khmer counter-attacked and by 1432 had compelled the Thais to retire. Despite this, they abandoned Angkor and moved their capital to Phnom Penh in 1434 and, recognising their weakened position, began paying tribute to Ayutthaya, a situation that was to continue for almost 400 years. Cambodia was reduced to the level of a third-rate power, a status from which she never recovered.

Many of the Khmer captives had been government officials at the royal court and outposts like Lopburi and under their influence the king adopted a number of Hindu-style practices that had been taken up by the Khmer, including the concept that the ruler was a god-king with total power of life and death over his subjects.

A special language, a mixture of Sanskrit and Khmer, was developed and used exclusively at the royal court while only members of the royal family were permitted to look directly at the monarch.

In 1438 the kingdom of Sukhothai was peaceably incorporated into Ayutthaya following the death of the ruler. Boromoraja II sent his seven-year-old son Ramesuan to govern Phitsanulok, which had, since 1430, been the capital of the kingdom of Sukhothai.

Boromoraja II then turned his attention to the north and in 1442 attacked Lan Na. The ruler based his defence on Lamphun and, so the story goes, he infiltrated soldiers into the Thai camp who cut off the tails of the war elephants, causing them to go on the rampage and thereby compelling the Thais to retire.

In 1445 the king of Malacca on the Malay Peninsula was overthrown and replaced by his half brother. Malacca was ostensibly a vassal of Ayutthaya and when the new ruler declined to send tribute a Thai army was despatched, via Pahang, to launch an attack. However, the Thais were defeated near Muar and forced to withdraw.

In 1448 Boromoraja II commenced his second campaign against Lan Na but was once more defeated and died soon after. He was succeeded by his now 17-year-old son Ramesuan, the governor of Phitsanulok, who took the name Boromo Trailokanat.

During his forty-year reign, the longest of any Ayutthayan monarch, Boromo Trailokanat was responsible for putting in place a centralised system of government that would remain largely unchanged until the early twentieth century.

He established five major government departments: Interior, Finance, Agriculture, Royal Household (responsible for the administration of justice) and Local Government of Ayutthaya.

Bits ‘n’ Bobs

Personal Directions: Taking time out

by Christina Dodd, founder and managing director 
of Incorp Training Asssociates

How long has it been since you had a really good holiday? One, two three years ... longer? How long has it been since you were able to be on your own for a whole day and do the things that you wanted to do, and not what everyone else wanted to do? How long has it been since you had time to yourself to just think without any distractions? Probably far too long is my guess. Time to ourselves - our own private time - is a very rare commodity indeed these days.

Personal quality time is something most people treasure but are unable to attain. Work and getting on with the daily chores in life take so much energy and effort it seems like the idea of finally being alone to pursue some of the things you enjoy doing moves further and further out of reach. I’m not meaning to sound selfish when I talk about personal quality time - I just think that it is an important aspect of our lives that needs to be fulfilled and not pushed aside and forgotten.

We need to take time out to reflect, review, rebuild, enquire and discover more about who we are and where we are going. We need time to indulge in the things that we like doing purely for our own gratification once in a while to remind us that we, too, exist and need to quench certain desires. But with all the distractions going on around us at our busy offices or in the home with the young ones, how can we achieve that? How can we take that so well deserved rest or break from the chaos?

The reality of it is that most of us don’t and we end up with increasing stress levels and declining states of health. Tempers flare, we get cranky and grouchy and are really not nice people to be around. We tend to complain and whinge more often than not and never give a kind word to anyone because we are so miserable with our own lot. Sounds like a pretty horrible place to be doesn’t it? Sadly, however, a lot of us live there.

Being pulled in several directions at once, juggling multiple priorities, lamenting about the difficulties of not having enough time to enjoy the pleasures of life, and handling all sorts of pressures and stress can lead to feelings of being totally overwhelmed, overworked and not appreciated by anyone.

One of the more rewarding sides of my training career has been my involvement in a series of programs that have enabled people to literally take time out and to review their own personal energy, to see where there’s a power outage, where a fuse has blown and begin the process of repairing the damage or putting preventative measures in place. This also includes looking at how we use our time and energy and how we might use those assets differently to achieve the results we want in a more relaxed, content way. Knowing what we need to operate at our own optimal level and being clear about what is important in our lives can enable us to make better choices about how and where to focus our energy and efforts.

In many ways we all need direction both in a professional and personal sense. Being all grown up doesn’t necessarily mean that we have all the answers and make no mistakes. We suffer as we grow into older adults, and the learning process is never over. We have to continue to devote some time to this process, and if we don’t, we are in trouble.

I recall a program I conducted in Singapore with a group of executives who had been highly stressed-out and were in great need of catching their breath and bringing their pace back to within sound and healthy limits. They were incredible achievers setting what they felt at the time were realistic and achievable targets. And not taking anything away from them - they performed brilliantly for the company. But not without a price to pay - their health - which also had a ripple effect on their professional skills which had an effect on the staff around them and so on.

Of all the activities and materials designed for the program which ran over a two day period, they seemed to give the greater response to those sessions which looked at the inner child and the building of relationships, moments of self assessment and reflection, times of sharing their deepest thoughts and desires. In terms of the inner child, they spent time pretending to be seven years old all over again, remembering the happiest times of their childhood and colouring in their dreams on large pieces of white paper with bright new crayons. It was a time to be peaceful and alone in their thoughts which was something these young executives had not been able to experience for a long time. They seemed to take on the characteristics of playful children in a playground.

They took to sharing their private thoughts and personal secrets with their partners in the training, like ducks take to water. After this experience it was almost as if a great burden had suddenly been lifted and they were able to discard a lot of emotional baggage that had been creating problems and causing anguish in their lives. Finally, at the end of the program, they were then ready to move forward with a deeper understanding and awareness of themselves and of what was most important in their lives.

Finding focus and having the time to devote to doing this proved to be a very worthwhile experience for this group of young people. It was an investment well spent and allowed those executives to maintain their positions and to go from strength to strength. Of course this kind of program has become an integral part of the company’s training schedule and is considered a vital safety valve in what the management regard as a pressure-cooker industry. But I believe that all fields of industry need to take a closer look at the people that they employ and their particular professional and personal needs. It’s always wise to practice a bit of preventative medicine rather than having to find a cure.

Humans are extremely resilient and have strong instincts for survival. They fight back and bounce back in extraordinary circumstances. But despite this, they need to be constantly reassured and accepted. They need to be regarded as important and require certain levels of attention that some times we overlook. In the workplace it is crucial that employees are treated this way. This does not mean pampering to their needs without thought and due consideration. It does mean realizing that every employee is an individual first and foremost, and through building on their existing qualities and strengths and improving upon their personal and interpersonal skills, they will become better equipped to perform in their roles as managers and leaders, presenters and communicators, team builders and team players.

I am continually surprised by the ability of people. Some have a natural talent or gift to excel and some require coaching and guidance. But at the end of the day, everyone has their own unique attributes and strengths that drive them forward. To take time out to “top up the tank” or to “give more flavour to the stock” is such a small price to pay when we look at the possibilities that lay ahead and what can be achieved.

Until next time, have a great week!

Should you require our assistance in providing some quality “time out” for staff at your company or organization, please don’t hesitate to email me at christina.dodd@ incorptraining.com or contact me at Incorp Training Associates in Bangkok.

Social Commentary by Khai Khem

Last call for alcohol!

Has anyone noticed that Pattaya is suddenly concerned with its image? Or that since the economy hasn’t fully recovered from the battering it received a few years ago, that tourist promotion is now the commercial cure for the nation’s economic woes? Perhaps readers remember when the stock market and ‘hot’ money was thought to be the magic wand that would turn Thailand into an Asian Tiger. The SET was roaring in the late 80s and mid 90s. In the new millennium it is barely registering a pulse.

Pattaya’s image will only alter when the city itself is transformed enough to deserve a different reputation from the one it has earned through the years. Admittedly, some people will resist changes which inconvenience them. One of the most controversial is the 2:00 a.m. closing hour for entertainment establishments. A bull’s eye was not metaphorically painted on Pattaya’s back; this order was issued throughout the nation. The earlier closing hours have had some positive results.

Logistically, Pattaya law enforcement personnel have an easier job of maintaining order when strict guidelines are laid down. We do not have sophisticated zoning plans. Our city has sprung up helter-skelter with no planning or forethought. We lack an adequate budget to implement road construction, garbage collection, traffic control, better health care and education. Much of the money for community improvements in the lives of low income families comes from charity organizations. Overworked and understaffed officials can surely make more use of their time and energy attending to other pressing issues than fighting a law that is probably in our best interests in the long run.

Pattaya City has a long list of issues to address. Crime and drug abuse is on the rise. Many of the streets and sois in the area are in such bad condition they are nearly impassable and so full of potholes they are truly dangerous. Makeshift slums are increasing all over the greater Pattaya and Jomtien area. Does Larn Island have its new trash incinerator yet?

One of the most frequent complaints around the city for many years has been the noise created by bars and karaoke clubs, traffic and loud music blaring all night long. Ordinary citizens and their children cannot sleep. Is the 2:00 a.m. closing hour really such a hardship that we must appeal to the Ministry of Interior for a special dispensation for bar owners to remain open longer than other cities in the country?

Dissenters say that this early closing is ruining our tourist industry. What rubbish. The percentage of annual tourists who come to Thailand who are annoyed when the bell rings in a bar at 2:00 a.m. and the barkeeper tells them to pay their bill because he is closing, is minuscule. These boozers have probably had enough to drink by then and should go home and go to sleep. If they never return to Thailand because of that, who’s going to notice?

Hopefully these drunks are not going to drive on our public roads in that condition. They can rent a room above the bar and pass out there. That should make up for any loss of income for the publican. For party animals who want to stay up all night and carouse, no one is stopping them. Thailand is not under marshal-law.

If the argument is really about tourism and not private greed, social order and the physical clean-up of Pattaya can only enhance the enjoyment of tourists. Take the hustlers, beggars and streetwalkers who ply their dubious services along Beach Road and some of the other popular streets in the area, for example. Police are finally making an effort to get rid of them. As private Thai citizens, they have the right to be in the area, but not the right to hassle and annoy others. Pattaya does actually have laws against public disorderly conduct, even though they are very flexible.

If the 2:00 a.m. closing hour continues to be strictly enforced, think how much easier it will be for the cops to control petty crimes and teen hoodlums, illegal street racers and drug dealers.

At the moment we are under pressure to prove that Thailand is safe from terrorist attacks and security measures have been increased in Chonburi and Rayong because of the upcoming World Scout Jamboree and the imminent peak tourist season. To implement those extra measures, we have had to call on the army, the navy, the marines and the border police. How long are we going to be able to maintain this level of reinforcement?

Our region is most definitely undergoing changes, and some of them are improvements long awaited. We should concentrate on the tasks at hand.

The 2:00 a.m. closing hour has been a law in place for some time now. Let’s move on to something else. How about filling up the potholes in all the sois and roads? Why not improve education for our young people so they don’t have to sell themselves into the sex industry? How about appealing to Bangkok for a more realistic city budget? Hell, I’d settle for a decent place to park in the city without mowing over rental cars, motorbikes, cafe tables, hustlers standing in the sois touting sleazy beer bars and vendors selling food and souvenirs. At present, the only time I can find a parking space in Pattaya is at 2:00 a.m. when everything is closed!

Women’s World: Battle of the Pantyhose

by Lesley Warmer

After the end of the war it took until 1948 before the production of nylon stockings returned to normal. Stockings have changed very little since Elizabeth’s reign other than developing different techniques for working heels or toes. When seamless stockings were developed it changed the future of ladies hosiery forever.

In the sixties when hemlines started to rise it created an embarrassing problem showing the tops of stockings, so in 1960 some would-be ‘sadist’ developed the pantyhose (known as tights in the UK). In the years since, pantyhose have come to dominate women’s hosiery.

Pantyhose suitable for any pose

By the time Mary Quant (a London boutique owner) created and manufactured the “mini-skirt” there was no choice but to use pantyhose if you wanted to stay fashionable. Soon after, Andre Courreges created “go-go” boots and brought the mini-skirt look into fashion.

One of the chief complaints ladies had about nylon stockings was the annoying fact that they became baggy with use, fondly known in the UK as the “Nora Batty look” from an old TV programme, where Nora continually has a problem with her stockings gathering in folds around her skinny ankles. It was the same with the first pantyhose; they were hard to get to fit well. This all changed in 1959 with the development of spandex, this strong elastic fiber has repeatedly revolutionized fashion ever since. It creates a dull look but this was accepted for the benefit of mini-skirts and boots.

Spandex continuously conforms to the body, stretching and shaping, molding and imprisoning the body within the confines of the pantyhose, snapping back at you when you stretch or pull for a little light relief.

In 1975 the first ladder proof tights appeared on the market.

In 1981 tights with hand knitted and crocheted looks became all the rage.

In 1983 stay-up’s appeared in beautiful designs: matt, opaque, shimmering, transparent, semi-opaque, fine-meshed, woolen and silken. The tops are always exclusive designs and some quite beautiful with a wide decorative lace. The tops of stay-up’s have a skin-friendly coating, which prevents slipping? Believe me when I say the tops of these stocking are not 100% reliable. I was running down the street one night in the rain as I felt the movement of one of my stay ups (this was not amusing at the time). As I struggled to run through the rain and hold it up, discreetly pressing the top through my skirt, I eventually lost the battle outside a busy pub.

Today Lycra is included in Nylon Pantyhose, which accounts for one size fits all. Fits all? Use your imagination when you take the pantyhose out of the packet and hold them up; look at the size of them. Look at your thighs, hips and backside; you don’t need too much imagination to realize what’s going to happen when you try to get ‘all of that’ into that tiny pair of pantyhose!

Somehow when I’m wriggling around yanking pulling and struggling in a variety of contorted positions to get into my pantyhose I don’t feel very feminine. In contrast, when you stretch out a leg and place your toe into a rolled down sheer nylon stocking, there’s a feeling of pure sensual pleasure as you slowly roll it up to hook into the suspender. If you happen to have a man in the room with you he would give you the world if he could. I’m not quite sure what he would say witnessing the battle of the pantyhose - it’s something we endeavour to keep private.