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Family Money: Thy
Will Be Done (Part 2)
By Leslie
Wright
Last week we started looking at why and how you should
make a will.
Everyone knows that in a will you specify who gets
what. The other things to consider, you will recall, are what you want
done with your body, and whom you will charge with carrying out your
wishes.
This latter person is called your Executor, and the
appointment of an appropriate person is a decision that should not be
taken lightly or made hastily.
An Executor is, basically, simply someone whom you know
and trust to ensure your wishes are carried out. (This provides the basic
answer to correspondent H.R’s second question.)
This person, however, has to be in a position to do so,
since your international holdings will have to be cleared through the
probate courts of each jurisdiction in which these assets are located -
perhaps Thailand, UK, Guernsey, the Isle of Man, Spain, Switzerland, and
so on.
‘Grant of Administration’ is the formal term for
this process, meaning that your Executor is given permission by the courts
in the various regimes to liquidate the estate after arrangements have
been made for any taxes due to each jurisdiction to be paid.
This task can be time-consuming and burdensome, and
provision has to be made in your will for “reasonable expenses”
involved.
As this could run to several thousands of Pounds for a
complex set of international holdings, it may be worthwhile to consider
taking out a life-insurance policy to cover those expenses; and if you
have significant assets that will be liable to substantial estate duties,
another to cover those.
Your Executor also has to be familiar with all your
assets, and where they’re located. Otherwise, confidential bank accounts
that no-one else knew about, for example, could be lost to the heirs
forever (much to the glee of those gnomes of Zurich).
A list giving complete details of all your assets and
their location can be left in a sealed envelope for your Executor to open
upon your death. (But he has to have this to hand or know where it’s
kept in order to do so!)
Who guards the guards?
While your brother, sister or nephew - or indeed,
anyone - can be appointed as your Executor, this task is more
appropriately given to a disinterested third party - that is, not a
beneficiary or relative. (Apart from anything else, this can avoid family
squabbles and accusations of vested interest.)
The dear old family solicitor back home is probably
ill-equipped to deal with the complications of liquidating an
international estate (which simply means assets held in more than one
country), even if he’s able to appreciate the problems that can arise
and help you make provisions for them by assisting you in writing multiple
wills.
Most international banks offer this service, but they
can be expensive.
Of course, whoever you appoint as your Executor is not
going to go into court and talk to the probate judge himself: an agent
will have to be appointed in each regime where you hold assets to do this
on your estate’s behalf. In most cases this will mean hiring a local
lawyer.
Again, then, making a separate will for each of those
regimes, and appointing a local person yourself as Executor for that will,
will make things simpler (and probably less costly in the long run) for
your heirs and beneficiaries.
Alternatively, you can appoint one Executor whom you
know and trust to be your worldwide Executor, and write him a separate
Letter of Wishes (as you would for the trustees of a trust) suggesting he
use ABC Company of such-and-such an address as the local agents/attorney
for clearing your local estate through probate, and similarly listing your
preferences for each regime in which you hold assets: typically, the law
firm who helped you buy your local property, or took care of registering
your car, and so on.
Domicile & Residence
It is worth noting that domicile is legally quite
different from residency, although the two may or may not be the same
country.
Should you be domiciled in the UK (even though resident
in Thailand) when you die, your worldwide assets are taxable under UK law.
And unlike many other regimes, this is applied to your entire estate.
In a recent UK budget, the inheritance tax nil-rate
band was raised to ฃ223,000. This means that any amounts over
ฃ223,000 will incur UK tax at the rate of 40%. Hence the estate of
someone with assets amounting to ฃ473,000 may be liable to pay
ฃ100,000 in UK inheritance tax before the heirs see a penny.
And the rules are similar - and sometimes worse - in
other regimes.
If, however, you are not domiciled in UK and all the
assets are outside UK, your estate would have no inheritance tax liability
in UK - but may very well have such a liability in the country where you
are now domiciled, or where the assets are located.
Changing domicile is not as simple as some people
think. In legal terms it is more a demonstrable state of mind than simply
showing where you’ve chosen to live for the past 10 or 20 years.
To rid yourself of UK domicile, for example, you’d
have to be able to show you have divested yourself of all ties to the UK.
This means no bank accounts, rented-out investment property or any other
assets which could be deemed to tie you to the UK. (And this includes the
State Pension Scheme.)
Thus, once you’ve established permanent residence
abroad for a number of years, with local bank accounts, business ties or
property, you can apply to the UK Inland Revenue for formal certification
that you are no longer domiciled in UK.
This will relieve your estate of the potential taxes
that would apply under UK rules to your worldwide holdings.
Again, this certification needs to be available to your
Executor.
In witness whereof...
The bit at the end of a will is of course your
signature.
While technically any will - handwritten or typed - is
valid with only your signature on it, it is worth bearing in mind that any
will can also be contested by anyone who has the will to do so (if
you’ll pardon the awful pun).
The real purpose of getting your signature witnessed is
to help your Executor overcome any legal wrangles as to the validity of
your will in court.
Again, technically one witness’ signature would
suffice in most regimes. But the general practice of obtaining two
witnesses’ signatures to your signature is in case one dies before he or
she can be hauled into court (if required) to testify a) that it is
his/her signature on that piece of paper; b) that he/she witnessed you
signing it - yes, your signature must be made in front of the witnesses,
not beforehand or afterwards; c) that no-one held a gun to your head while
you signed it; and d) that you were compos mentis and sober when
you signed it.
It is important that the witnesses should not benefit
under the will, otherwise any bequests made to them would be voided (so
that excludes your spouse or life-partner in most instances); and worse,
the entire will could be declared invalid.
It is okay for your Executor to sign as a witness,
provided he/she does not benefit directly from the will; but it is
preferable to get two disinterested third parties (who nonetheless know
you) to sign as witnesses, and their contact details written clearly under
their signatures.
They do not have to know the contents of the will: they
are merely attesting to the fact that you signed it in front of them, and
if called upon to do so, to state that you did so willingly and while of
sound mind.
This all may seem horribly complicated, and another
reason to put off making a will.
Indeed, estate planning is a complex and potentially
tricky subject, and requires professional guidance to protect the
interests of our heirs and loved ones.
But this is no excuse to burden them with the added
problems they will inevitably encounter should you fail to make proper
provision for your passing. If you haven’t made a will, or it’s not up
to date, I would urge you to do something about it soon - while you still
have the chance!
Leslie Wright is Managing Director of Westminster
Portfolio Services (Thailand) Ltd., a firm of independent financial
advisors providing advice to expatriate residents of the Eastern Seaboard
on personal financial planning and international investments. If you have
any comments or queries on this article, or about other topics concerning
investment matters, contact Leslie directly by fax on (038) 232522 or
e-mail [email protected].
Further details and back articles can be accessed on his firm’s website
on www.westminsterthailand.com.
Editor’s note: Leslie sometimes receives e-mails to
which he is unable to respond due to the sender’s automatic return
address being incorrect. If you have sent him an e-mail to which you have
not received a reply, this may be why. To ensure his prompt response to
your enquiry, please include your complete return e-mail address, or a
contact phone/fax number.
The Computer Doctor
by Richard Bunch
Continuing with the Windows 2000 theme started last
week, here are another 5 reasons why you should consider upgrading:
6. My Documents is nicer in Windows 2000, not least by
making My Documents, not My Computer, the top of the shell namespace. The
distinction is subtle, yet important: When you open an Explorer window,
your documents are what’s open, not a view of the file system. For new
users especially, this makes much more sense.
7. Global folder options are a real boon. Personally, I
loathe Web view in Windows 98. This is a hassle, because you have to turn
it off one folder at a time. But Windows 2000 has a global Folder Options
setting: You turn off Web view and it stays off.
8. The Personalized Start Menu also offers many
advantages. I think all Windows 2000 users should try this feature before
turning it off: The Start Menu can easily become cluttered with
infrequently used programs. This feature nicely organizes it into a
shorter list of the programs you actually do use.
9. I’ve been using Windows 2000 for many months now
and have become used to its cleaned-up and uncluttered system views, such
as the minimalist root of My Computer, which displays only drives and a
Control Panel folder. Meanwhile, the Windows 98 My Computer root is a mess
of icons, including the aforementioned few along with Printers, Dial-up
Networking, Scheduled Tasks, Web Folders, and others, depending on your
configuration.
10. Using a Notebook under Windows 98 could have been a
bit of a pain when it came to synchronizing data, using the very
agricultural Briefcase feature. In Windows 2000, this is replaced with
powerful Offline Files and Folders feature, which is a technological
breakthrough. You get access to the network documents (or anything else)
that you’ve marked as available offline. And you access them the same
way you would if you were connected to the network. When you log on and
off of the network, your files are synchronized automatically. This is
easily the most welcome mobile computing feature in any version of Windows
and a clear reason why almost all mobile users should upgrade to Windows
2000 Professional.
And finally, the minimum system requirements to run it
are a 133 MHz Pentium-compatible CPU, 64 MB RAM, 1 GB disk space. The word
minimum cannot be stressed too much; personally I wouldn’t recommend
anything less than a Celeron processor and 128Mb RAM.
Send your questions or comments to the Pattaya Mail at
370/7-8 Pattaya Second Road, Pattaya City, 20260 or Fax to 038 427 596 or
E-mail to [email protected].
The views and comments expressed within this column are not necessarily
those of the writer or Pattaya Mail Publishing.
Richard Bunch is Managing Director of Action Computer
Technologies Co., Ltd. providing professional information technology and
Internet services which includes; custom database and application
development; website design, promotion and hosting; domain name
registration; turnkey e-commerce solutions; computer and peripheral sales
service and repairs, networks (LAN & WAN) and IT consulting. For
further information, please e-mail [email protected]
or telephone/fax 038 716 816 or see our website www.act.co.th
Successfully Yours: Dr.
Sunya Viravaidya
By Mirin MacCarthy
Dr. Sunya Viravaidya of the Pattaya International Hospital
was fated to study medicine, having come from a long line of doctors. His
destiny began with his Thai grandfather, then his father and aunts and uncles
as well. Even his Scottish mother, Isabelle McKinnon Robertson, is a physician
whom his Thai father, Dr. Samart, met when they were both studying medicine at
Edinburgh University.
Dr. Sunya is constantly busy and ever working, yet when you
are finally able to talk with him you discover he is a truly delightful man
with a down to earth manner and a great sense of humour.
 “I
suppose I inherited it from my parents,” Dr. Sunya said and grinned. “My
mother had a dry wit but my father was more jovial. I have always found that
when something rocks you, the best solution is to laugh. Laughter is the best
medicine to reduce stress.”
Dr. Sunya comes from a family of four brothers and sisters
and his elder brother is the renowned family planner Khun Meechai. They had a
normal upbringing in Bangkok until Dr. Sunya was sent away for six years
schooling to Melbourne’s prestigious Geelong Grammar School at age 12. When
I suggested that must have been a shock Dr. Sunya laughed, “Not
particularly, I made some wonderful international friends who are still my
friends today.”
After boarding school, it was another six years studying
medicine at the University of Melbourne. After graduation he spent his
year’s residency in Melbourne then four months in an emergency medical
service before returning to Thailand.
Dr. Sunya then took various clinical training positions in
the Rama Thai Bhodi University Hospital in Bangkok for two years. In 1974 he
had almost decided to go England to do his M.R.C.P., but then he chose to come
to Pattaya to set up in private practice instead.
“The seventies were when the tourist boom had just
started in Pattaya with the troops on R& R from Vietnam. I did a survey
and a feasibility study and approached the bank for a loan.”
Perhaps rocked by my comment, “You were certainly serious
about it,” Dr. Sunya laughed again, “If you are going to go - you go, that
is the way I approach most things. I had a one-man practice then, just a
secretary, gardener, maid and a rented house. It was the Pattaya International
Clinic for many years. In 1977 we added a six bed in-patient complex. In 1980
that became 20 beds, ICU, O.R. and nine departments.”
The hospital has now progressed to 80 beds and a staff of
250. Dr. Sunya believes that standards rather than the outright number of beds
are important for a hospital in these days of frequent one day and out-patient
procedures.
His plans for the future are: “To keep on doing what I do
best, to try to improve on everything I do. I wrote a treatment manual so the
medical treatment standard would be the same. I set the standards for the PIC
kitchen, the Sugar Hut, and the hospital. I want everything to be dynamic,
moving forward. In the pipeline for the hospital is a modern Lasik laser eye
surgery unit to serve eastern Thailand. My aim was for the hospital to be
internationally recognized by both private and academic institutions. We have
achieved that. Our standards are beyond ISO, a system that is over done in
Thailand and in fact worldwide. ISO is becoming totally ridiculous; soon there
will be ISO for parking.”
In 1984, Dr. Sunya opened the first Sugar Hut Resort at
Jomtien in partnership with friends. The aim was to preserve history and
culture with a meld of Thai building and Balinese tropical landscaping. Dr.
Sunya ran it himself for six years. “It was like a hobby but I was flat
out!” he laughed. In 1989 the landowners sold the land so it moved to the
present location at Pratumnak Hill in 1990. “It was gradually upgraded from
thatch and sea view to wooden and jungle view.”
Ever on the move, Dr. Sunya formed his own running team in
1989 called the Dr’s Fitness Team. He used to run 10 km and ran in marathons
and triathlons for five years. “You must be a bit of a masochist to
train,” he laughed. “Now I would like to be better at golf rather than
running faster.”
Dr. Sunya is married to Khun Chirawan, a Thai Dr. of
Pharmacy and they have a twenty-year-old son studying economics at John
Hopkins University and a sixteen-year-old daughter at school in Pennsylvania.
Surprisingly, he has no desire for either of them to continue with the family
medical tradition. “Medicine today is a tough life. You have to organize
time off and replacements and you don’t have that luxury in the first years.
There is so much you must give up for medicine, you have to give it
everything.”
So what does success mean to Dr. Sunya? “When I achieve
what I set out to do, that is success. When I look at it, it is no big deal,
what my mother would say, ‘You are expected to accomplish.’ There is a
certain amount of satisfaction but it is important not to dwell on it.”
His advice to medical students of today is: “Try to see
the bigger picture than what is usually presented. Look at the patient as a
person rather than a disease. Don’t dwell on money, it will come.”
Dr. Sunya values credibility, honesty and sincerity as most
important qualities. His interests, in the rare times he is not working, are
golf, gardens and Japanese koi carp. He has some rare tri coloured ones and
two big carp ponds in the beautiful tropical landscaped hospital grounds. Dr.
Sunya is a caring, thinking man who surrounds himself and others with
spiritually nurturing environments. Truly a remarkable person.
Snap Shots: Battery
power!
by Harry Flashman
All but the most delinquent photographer knows to look
after his or her camera. Lens caps are there to be used. Camera bags are
needed to store the camera. The camera gets wiped dry after excursions in
the rain. Most cameras these days turn themselves off after a period of
time to conserve their batteries. However, it is those same batteries that
can do untold damage to the electronic innards of today’s cameras.
 Harry
was reminded of this the other day when he went to use the trusty Nikon
and it wouldn’t power up or electrically wind on. In fact, nothing! Now,
the motor drive on the older Nikons and the camera bodies themselves
sometimes have a habit of getting condensation between them and you’ll
end up getting nothing. The answer is to unship one from the other, wipe
and wriggle as you re-attach and bingo! Away you go. But not this time.
Repeating the procedure did not work, so Harry was forced to wind on
manually, as the actual light meter was now working OK, with the motor
drive removed.
At the time, there was little I could do, and in the
manual shift mode, I was quite sure I was getting the right exposures.
What had not occurred to me at the time was the fact that when I was
attached to the motor drive, there was no power, yet disconnecting the
motor and its eight batteries, I once again had power for the LED’s,
light meter and such.
It was the next day before I looked again at the
problem, and then remembered that when the motor drive is disconnected,
the camera uses its own small cadmium battery, but when hooked up to the
motor drive, the camera draws its power from the motor drive battery pack.
So this was why I had light meter facilities, but none when I attached the
motor drive.
I then began to think how long it was since I had
checked the eight batteries in the driver. Possibly a year! Opening up the
battery pack case, I was greeted with a shower of white crystals and a
group of sweating, leaking AA batteries. Six out of the eight were
leaking. Hence no power.
Mentally castigating myself for such errant
carelessness I pulled the motor drive battery compartment apart to see the
extent of the damage. Harry here was very lucky - no corrosion was
evident. However, I did remove the batteries and then immersed the pack
case in very hot water. This removes the crystalline substances that leech
out of the batteries themselves. A gentle blow dry and very careful
inspection showed there had been no lasting damage. The phrase, “Just in
time” kept going through my head!
Also interestingly, the six batteries that had begun to
leak were the least expensive of the two types of battery in the drive.
There is a moral here, isn’t there?
In fact, there are two morals to be learned. The first
is to check batteries every three months, I would suggest, rather than
just waiting for the batteries to fail or become erratic. And secondly,
you get what you pay for - so buy the best you can. It will serve you well
in the end.
This little scenario would have been much worse if the
battery pack had been internal with the camera works themselves. The
discharging batteries also give off fumes that attack and corrode the
complex electronic circuitry. That little problem can destroy the camera
totally - and that is no joke!
So Harry escaped this time around. After 200 baht for
new batteries, the motor drive and camera are functioning just perfectly.
Till the next time - unless I make a note in my yearly planner to check
every three months. It will be good insurance. Think about it too.
Modern Medicine: Antibiotic
Resistance - the rise of the Superbug?
by Dr Iain Corness
The World Health Organization (WHO) is warning that the
incidence of drug resistant strains of antibiotics is on the increase.
This has produced problems for the treatment of TB, malaria, pneumonia and
diarrhoea. All of these are ailments we do not want, and to think that we
might end up with nothing to fight them with is more than worrying -
it’s downright scary!
WHO goes so far as to say that if governments do not
make greater efforts to control disease and stem the spread of resistance
there will be a return to the pre-antibiotic era and entire populations
could be wiped out by ‘superbugs’ for which no treatment exists. The
Director General of the WHO saying that, “The world risks losing these
valuable drugs and our opportunity to eventually control many infectious
diseases because of increasing antibiotic resistance.”
You only have to look at the penicillin group to see
what happens. When penicillin first arrived, it was going to be the
saviour of the human race. Unfortunately, the bugs became resistant, so we
invented “super” penicillin, called Amoxycillin. We were back on top
again, throwing Amoxycillin around like confetti at weddings, and so
resistance to this drug appeared. Nothing daunted, we produced a
combination of Amoxycillin with Clavulanic Acid (known best by the trade
name Augmentin). This was going to stop the bugs - and it did - for a
while. But by now, the bugs are on the ascendancy - the now Augmentin
resistant bugs are on the march again!
The interesting fact that emerges from the research
into this problem is that there are two main reasons for the emerging drug
resistance - underuse and overuse. The first is seen mainly in
underdeveloped countries and is through failure to complete the full
course of the antibiotic treatment. When the patient feels much better and
so then stops treatment to save money for further drugs, colonies of the
organisms are still alive, and these subsequent colonies grow up and
replicate as now drug resistant strains. That bug strain when passed on to
a new “host” will produce the ailment (pneumonia, for example) but the
bug will not respond to the usual course of treatment. In this way we
produce such bug creatures as the MRSA, or Methicillin resistant
Staphylococcus Aureus (sometimes called “multiple” resistant). Of
course, sometimes we do not complete the course of antibiotics because we
just forget, or can’t be bothered when we are obviously getting better.
In the affluent countries, through patient demand (or
expectations), there is overprescribing of antibiotics and so the bugs
become “used” to the presence of the drugs, and once again, subsequent
colonies develop as drug resistant strains.
So what can you do? Well, firstly it is better to let
the doctor prescribe courses of antibiotics, rather than grab a handful
from the chemist, and secondly, go right to the end of the course.
Finally, remember that antibiotic therapy has no place in the treatment of
viral infections!
 Dear
Hillary,
Please advise me. Let’s assume a college educated and
conservative Thai lady like you - do they say “you’re my good
friend” or “you’re my boyfriend”? How can I tell if my Thai lady
friend likes me or not? For example, if you start dating an American
woman, they give you immediate feedback. Since I’m not getting any
positive or negative response from her, I don’t know the status of our
relationship. I don’t know if I should continue courting her for a
possible long-term relationship?
Stuart
Dear Stuart,
All on your own, you have discovered the West meets
East principle. You poor lad! Someone should have warned you! The crux of
the matter, and in some ways the heart of your problem or the problem for
your heart, lies in your description of the young lady - “college
educated and conservative”. There is a big difference between these
girls and many others you will meet, especially around this neck of the
woods. Conservative is putting it mildly. Public displays of affection are
a no-no, and you will not prise undying protestations of love, devotion
and let’s get at it, from one of these young ladies overnight. The fact
that she is going out with you at all is a plus, but she will set the
pace, my boy, not you! Hillary has warned you.
Dear Hillary,
I am 24 years old and have been stationed in Pattaya
for three months and while I find the young women here are much more
friendly than the girls back home (UK), I would like to meet some ladies
of “higher standing” if you know what I mean. How do you go about
meeting and dating “nice” girls?
Martin
Dear Martin,
Are you really sure you want to meet the refined ladies
of Pattaya? Please re-read Stuart’s letter above, before moving on
further! The greeting, meeting, dating, mating routine is different here
than it is in jolly old England. However, if your intentions are long
term, then begin with the clubs, rather than the pubs, establish your bona
fides and wait. And wait. And wait. In the meantime, if you’ve got a
Lamborghini Diablo (see last week) you can give Hillary a call. I like
dating younger men, they’re so much more considerate of us elderly
ladies.
Dear Hillary,
The day-time guard at the entrance to our village is
the most grumpy and surly man. He will whistle and shout at tradesmen who
are just trying to deliver goods, and do their jobs too. What do you
suggest I should do about this man?
Minnie
Dear Minnie,
You really are a mouse, aren’t you? All you have to
do is ask the other people in your village, and if they all feel like you,
then take your grievances to the company that supplies the guard. They
will happily supply you with another and take grumble guts to another
location. But you have to ask the other people, Ms. Minnie. It has to be a
majority decision beforehand or you could end up with egg on your face (or
a security boom on the roof of your car).
Dear Hillary
With reference to the 60 year old father visiting here
(Vol VIII No. 35), surely he will feel quite young amongst the local
“Living Dead” expats?
Regards,
Farooq
Dear Farooq,
Hillary’s advice to the daughter was to let Mum and
Dad do whatever they wanted while they were here. At age 60 they will be
quite capable of selecting their own avenues of entertainment. From what
Hillary sees of the local older expats, they appear to be enjoying
themselves immensely. Undoubtedly the sales of Vitamin V keeps the smiles
on both pharmacist and philanderer, but “Living Dead”? What bars are
you drinking in? Or perhaps more importantly, what is it that you are
drinking?
So what’s your answer to the aging population? Shoot
them? Put them in homes for the about to become extinct? Why not just let
them be - they’re not harming anyone, and if they are enjoying what
little life they have left - is this a crime? You appear to have a teensy
bit of a problem, Farooq, baby. Reckon it’s called “jealousy”.
Dear Hillary,
You can’t get all these silly letters. Surely they
are made up. Tell us, you can unload on us - we won’t tell anyone!
Jimbo.
Dear Jimbo,
Aren’t you the sweetest one to think of Hillary like
that! All the troubles and woes we lonely hearts advice people have to
take home. Some nights I just sob myself to sleep. Of course on other
nights I almost wet the bed laughing when I get letters from people like
Farooq. Now there’s a really silly letter for you! Or of course, your
own one, Jimbo, my sweet.
Dear Hillary,
When the local people talk about “my friend you” -
who are they talking about. I really don’t understand, and find it
terribly confusing.
Confused
Dear Confused,
You certainly are, aren’t you! “My friend you”
refers to a friend of yours, not a friend of theirs. It is just a quaint
example of how literal translations from Thai to English do not work too
well. Just take note for the future and keep smiling. Or learn Thai.
GRAPEVINE
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Shanghai bill
The international news that
thirty-seven men have been arrested in a dubious Chinese male
bathhouse has sent shock waves through Pattaya’s gay community.
Apparently, the arrests had taken place even though the men had argued
with police that they were in the nude to prevent their clothes
getting wet amid all the steam. The manager of one of Pattaya’s
leading bathhouses, nicknamed Dolly, sought to reassure the jittery
locals. “We would not have the same problem here with the police as
we do not have enough rooms to entertain thirty seven people.”
Darting around
Pattaya’s successful darts league
was in the news this week after a punter spiked a sausage sandwich.
His projectile unfortunately bounced off the bull’s eye wire and, to
the consternation of all present, landed bang in the center of the
snack meal on a nearby table. A potentially violent argument then
developed between the dart thrower who argued an act of God had
occurred and the diner who claimed his delicacy had certainly been
ruined by dangerous bacteria. A compromise was then reached in which
the darts player agreed to withdraw from the game to eat the sausage
sandwich, whose owner in return volunteered to join the darts team.
OK, that’s fair, chuck.
Good atmosphere
It was a busy Tuesday evening when
GEOC (Grapevine Eating Out Collective) called in Rosie O’Grady’s
Pub and Restaurant on the increasingly popular Soi Seven. There were
plenty of punters both for the English or maybe Irish style pub food
(Thai dishes are also served) and for the vibrant bar area which is
clearly favored by regulars. Wisely, the live music was not too loud.
Customers were welcomed in a homely fashion by a farang host. This is
a place which deserves to succeed. Just a minor point though. Next
time you redo the menu, suggest you avoid pricing most items to end
with the digit 9, e.g. 69 baht or 149 baht. It’s a bit d้jเ
vu.
Price hikes in view
One of the many sad features about
the 1997 Asian financial crisis is that it placed inflation firmly on
the Thai agenda. The recent surge in gasoline prices will again fuel
costs of everything that must be transported which is actually just
about anything. Amongst the commodities expected to become more
expensive once again are taxi fares, electricity bills, market produce
and restaurant prices. For guys and gals with a healthy foreign bank
account, all this doesn’t matter much. For those on a fixed income
or paid modestly in Thai baht, it’s a different story.
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Overstay fee
Reader SD writes that he found
himself with a three day visa overstay after being hospitalized
following a minor road accident. He did the right thing in obtaining a
medical certificate authorized by the government hospital at
Banglamung. On arrival at the immigration office, he expected to pay
500 baht for an extension but was charged a total of 1100 baht. He
wonders why. The explanation is that any extension costs 500 baht. In
this case, SD was additionally charged for the three day overstay @
200 baht a day. This is normal procedure for minor overstays.
Not telling the truth
A farang has been arrested after
lying to the tourist police that he had lost his passport and
traveler’s checks. He wanted the official report to obtain a new
passport from his embassy and to try and reclaim the cash from his
insurance company. His scam was discovered when suspicious officers
insisted on checking in his presence his hotel room and safety deposit
box. It is a serious offence under Thai law to submit false
information to the police. In this case, the farang was lucky only to
have his visa revoked followed by deportation to the airport. He could
easily have become a guest of the Department of Corrections on a
longer term basis.
Culture vultures
An attempt by amateur local
theatricals to update Shakespeare’s Hamlet for the twenty
first century has failed lamentably and caused an outcry about
prostitution of the well known bard of Avon. Firstly, the length was
reduced to twenty minutes to cut out unnecessary background
information which the audience might find boring. Secondly, it was
renamed Hamlette because the producers could not find enough
actors to wear men’s clothes. Thirdly, they gave Claudia,
Hamlette’s aunt, most of Polonius’ lines because the actress
playing Claudia had learned his lines by mistake. Finally, to reduce
rehearsal time, they added several new characters such as Louise, Dawn
and Dinah who are all deaf mutes who commit suicide off stage. Stick
to what you’re good at, girls!
Tailpiece
The Made in Thailand market on second
road really is the place to rumble for jumble. There’s a
create-your-own Titanic model on sale which is actually the defunct
Queen Mary. Hermann Goering’s ashes must be twitching at the sight
of a Luftwaffe jacket with an arm patch reading, “Another s****y day
in paradise.” Best of all is a shirts’ stall with the sobering
thought, “Similar to Marks and Spencer.”
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Dining Out: Montien’s
International Buffet - with their International Chef
by Miss Terry Diner
Pepe, the executive chef at the Montien Hotel, is an
interesting fellow. A passionate, portly chap, he was born in Barcelona and has
spent 27 years cooking around the world. This sparked the International Buffet
at the Verandah Coffee Shop on Saturday nights. This is another all you can eat,
380 baht (plus service and VAT) deal (and kids half price).
 The
term “coffee shop” does not do the venue justice. It is a proper restaurant
on the lower floor of the Montien and overlooks the swimming pool. It has two
sections - one covered, “natural” area and another set back slightly and
fully air-conditioned. Cushioned cane chairs and large tables with blue cloths
give the place a “picnic” atmosphere, and the brightly shirted attendants
all heighten the tropical impression. There are also high chairs available for
small children.
The buffet is laid out at the entrance to the restaurant, and
the range is truly amazing. Pepe suggested that we should look at the cold food
first and there is a huge range of European salad items there, along with smoked
fish as well as roasted chicken, pork and beef.
While still in the cold foods, there is a section with
oysters in the shell and an interesting salad bar where the chefs on duty will
make you an Italian Caesar salad on the spot - to your directions too!
There is also a Japanese bar with Sushi and Sashimi, with
prawn, crab and salmon, and just around the corner, a little lady making tempura
items, with the prawns looking particularly tempting.
 From
there you can move on to a pasta table, with several types available, including
not only the usual spaghetti and tagliatelle, but a most interesting looking
shiny black spaghetti, which is produced by soaking the pasta in squid’s ink
(or at least that’s what I think Pepe said)! There is a choice of sauces -
bolognaise, tomato or creamy sauce, and some seafood to go with it, such as
mussels, prawn and squid.
Moving right along, there is a Thai section, which on our
Saturday night had noodles and Gaeng Keowaan. You choose whether you want beef,
chicken or pork.
The next section is the Mongolian BBQ, with some very
enthusiastic young chef’s waiting for your every whim. That can be chicken,
pork or beef, all BBQ’d in front of you, with fresh vegetables and numerous
sauces for you to choose from.
Still not finished! There is a line-up of covered food
warmers with such varied and interesting items as chicken with chilli, baked
mussels, chicken and garlic with lemon sauce and pork loin with mustard sauce.
But wait, there’s more! There is a cream of pumpkin soup that Pepe assured me
was the best in Pattaya, and finally there are desserts, with Thai, European and
Crepe Suzette cooked in front of you!
Miss Terry and the team sat in the air-con comfort and
pondered over a glass of house white wine before hitting the food tables “big
time”! Being rather fond of oysters, I put a few on a plate, and decorously
added some thick slices of cold salmon, sprinkled a little fennel on it and
brought a small dish for the chilli sauce. While I was at it, I also brought
some prawn and salmon sushi, along with the Wasabe that you already know is one
of Miss Terry’s all-time favourites. (Miss Terry’s recipe - 3 balls of
Wasabe and 1 teaspoon of Soya sauce and mix well and wait for the wallop at the
back of the nose!)
After the “appetizers” it was into the black spaghetti -
terrific, thank you Pepe, and then Miss Terry made a pig of herself at the
Mongolian BBQ, finally finishing up with the superb mustard sauce pork.
The secret is small plates and try everything! You won’t be
disappointed. Miss Terry’s guarantee. Highly recommended.
The Verandah Coffee Shop, Montien Hotel, Pattaya 2nd Road,
100 metres up from the new Tops Shopping Centre. Telephone 428 155.
Animal Crackers:
How to photograph your new Puppy
by Mirin
MacCarthy
Emailed by a friend:
1. Wash and dry squirming puppy preferably in your
swimmers.
2. Find camera and load up with film.
3. Remove film box from puppy’s mouth and throw in garbage.
4. Grab puppy out of the garbage and wipe rice from muzzle.
5. Choose suitable background for photo.
6. Mount camera on tripod and focus.
7. Find puppy and remove dirty sock from mouth.
8. Put puppy in pre-focussed spot and return to camera.
9. Forget the spot and crawl after puppy on hands and knees.
10. Focus with one hand and fend off puppy with the other.
11. Get tissue and clean dribble from lens.
12. Take flashcube out of puppy’s mouth and throw away.
13. Lock cat out and put peroxide on puppy’s scratched nose.
14. Put magazines back on coffee table.
15. Replace glasses and check camera for damage.
16. Rush puppy outside yelling, “No, no, wait, wait!”
17. Clean up mess.
18. Put camera away and fix a drink.
19. Resolve to teach puppy “sit and stay” tomorrow.
Animal Hospital
Readers Query: What do you do for a dog with no fur? I
have seen many hideous stray dogs here with no fur, what can be done about
it other than shooting them. Can they be fixed and how much does it cost?
 Before
Reply: The fur loss is usually caused by living rough and
dirty, malnutrition and resulting low immunity to parasites. It is easily
and cheaply cured in even the worst of cases by one Ivomectin injection
administered by a Vet. Followed by one Amitrax wash available at the Vets
once a week by foster care for six to eight weeks. Amitrax wash is available
at most Vets at the princely sum of 20 baht a wash. A little bit of good
food and T.L.C. and hey presto a new dog. Check out these before and after
photos to see how cheaply and easily miracles can be worked.
 After
6 weeks of treatment
The animal will come to you if you feed it for a week or
two before attempting to entice it to the Vets, or maybe you could entice
the Vet to it. Some Vets will even do beach calls.
Mange
Mange is caused by parasites that live in the skin or
hair of the dog. Symptoms are hair loss and a lot of scratching until the
poor pooch is a bleeding mess. There are two different types of mange and 2
different medications. The vet will take a sample of the skin and look
through a microscope to determine which type of mange the dog has.
Sarcoptic Mange is contagious. The treatment is simple,
one injection once a week for 3 weeks.
Demodex Mange is not contagious; it is more like an
immune deficiency. The treatment consists of washes with medicine. Consult
your vet.
Down The Iron Road:
Little and Large
by John D.
Blyth
This week’s two pictures both show steam locomotives,
one tiny, the other huge, but they have this in common: both were built for
the ‘track gauge’ known world-wide as standard gauge - 1435mm in metric
Britain and 4ft 8 1/2 in. in non-metric USA, the measurement being between
the inner surface of the rail heads. The pioneer railways builder and
engineer, George Stephenson, who rose from a colliery engine-minder to cover
his country and others with railways, chose this gauge, much the same as
that of colliery tram roads he knew so well, and on this gauge have run
trains faster and heavier than any other...yet the number of different
gauges used runs into the hundreds!
The tiny engine, named ‘Gazelle’ was built in
King’s Lynn, Norfold by Dodman & Co. for a local corn merchant,
William Burkitt. Just why he wanted a locomotive is not known, but he had
some ‘pull’ with local railways and some others, for he used to put
‘Gazelle’ on rail and travel quite long distances. On one trip in 1899
he took it to Chesterfield and back, 105 miles each way in a single day,
with a four-hour rest at his destination. The smallest ever on this gauge,
it weighed just 5 1/2 tons.
 ‘Gazelle’
the tiny locomotive built in King’s Lynn, and thought to be the smallest
ever for the standard gauge.
At Burkitt’s death, ‘Gazelle’ was sold to Col.
Holman Fred Stephens, who ran a number of dubious railways in England, one
of which, the Shropshire & Montgomeryshire, had been part of a grandiose
scheme and here it was put to work on the Criggion branch. Light track,
small passenger demand but a paying quarry at the end. In 1939 the line was
commandeered by the War Department, and ‘Gazelle’ with it; it does not
seem to have worked much during that period, although I did see it, just
once, coming down into the S & M’s station in Shewsbury. Still
‘W.D’ property, it came to Longmoor in Hampshire in the 1950’s; here
was an Engineers’ training railway, and the locomotive stood, as seen, on
a plinth at a corner of the Parade Ground; later it passed for a time to the
National Railway Museum at York and has just been reported to me by a
‘back home’ as located in the small museum at Tenterden, on one of the
‘Col. Stephens’ railways that has survived as a preservation project. I
think this quaint little relic is safe for the foreseeable future!
Steam, and on the same gauge as used by ‘Gazelle’ the
other locomotive is one of 25 simple Mallet articulated locomotives of the
4-8-8-4 wheel arrangement, built by the American Locomotive Co., New York,
for the heavily graded sections of the Union Pacific Railroad, between 1941
and 1944. Although other locomotives may exceed some of their dimensions,
and even approach their weight when ‘ready for action’ they are, by
consent, the very biggest steam locomotives put on rail anywhere - all
contenders are also American as well. They are universally known as the
‘Big Boys’ - really an obvious title, but one with a little story to it.
When the first of the class was part complete it was placed outside the main
shop to make some space for those to follow; here it was seen by a labourer
whose work was outside, so he had not seen this massive type before; after
gazing spellbound for a little time, he took a piece of chalk and scrawled
the words ‘Big Boy’ on the smoke box front, where it was seen by
officialdom - who took it the right way and adopted it as an unofficial
title. Say ‘Big Boy’ to a loco-man almost anywhere and to this day, he
will know what you mean.
 Union
Pacific RR 4-8-8-4 locomotive No. 4019 when almost new. In its 20-year life
it covered over one million miles.
The 25 locomotives were put to work from Cheyenne and
Green River depots, also visiting Laramie and Ogeden, so four turntables had
to be enlarged to take the new monsters; they worked over Sherman Hill and
over the less-known but harder section over the Wahsatch Mountain route. In
those difficult years, which culminated in the USA’s entry into the war,
the ‘Big Boys’ were indispensable, and the tons of essential supplies
that they shifted could not have moved by any other means; yet, soon after
peace arrived the move to diesel traction began and stream traction was
ousted quickly. And yet there could, possibly, have been another 50 of them!
During the 1970s, fuel crises were commonplace, and each
time some USA railroad would look again at steam, and once at least the U.P.
looked again at the ‘Big Boys’. Great though they were, the design had
been hastened, and there was room for refinement. The great French
locomotive engineer Andre Chapelon was consulted, and he recommended his
well-known remedies, higher boiler pressure, higher degree of superheat,
bigger steam passages from throttle to exhaust, and - which even from such a
source was unexpected, a conversion to compound propulsion. Too much to
swallow, in view of the known limitations of earlier such locomotives,
remembering that a ‘Big Boy’ could run with safety at 80mph and more,
which no compound Mallet could do. The Chapelon proposal was to make one
more between the frames on the leading unit, to provide the volume of low
pressure cylinder needed. Fascinating!
Some very ambitious figures for horsepower of the ‘Big
Boys’ have been bandied about, but I think 7,000 hp at the drawbar, and
maybe 9,000 in the cylinders is about enough. But I believe any figure that
Chapelon produced, for he knew, because his figures were calculated and not
guessed and his estimate for a ‘Chapleon Big Boy’ was 13,000 hp in the
cylinders and a five figure output for hauling the train. It was not to be,
the crisis ended too soon.
Seven ‘Big Boys’ still exist in various museums,
etc., and one at their old home at Cheyenne is said to be in excellent
working order, although reports of its being out on the line do not seem to
reach us.
Even the former ‘Steamtown’ depot at Carnforth
enquired for a ‘Big Boy’; they were perfectly serious but the sheer size
would have ensured that it came in at least two parts. No way was seen to
transport these to the depot from Liverpool or Birkenhead Dock, and even
more serious, no way could be devised to re-unite the parts on arrival at
‘Steamtown’.
Just for the record, a ‘Big Boy’ with steam up and
ready to go, weighed something like 550 tons, or just about 100 times the
weight of little ‘Gazelle’.
Woman’s World: Keeping
a healthy looking face with homemade cosmetics
by Lesley Warner
Make sure when you put on a face pack, you can do this
without interruption. Have you ever seen anyone with a face pack on? It’s
pretty scary.
The following are some recipes given to me by friends and
visitors that have read the column. If you have any please send them to me.
I firmly believe that cosmetics that you can produce yourself are better. I
have lots more recipes for face packs and creams to cover all types of skin
that I will put in later editions.
Home beauty recipes and remedies have been around for
centuries. Remarkable remedies were discovered purely out of necessity. Over
a period of time, many home remedies have proven to be effective and
natural, therefore healthy!
Making your own beauty products costs a fraction of what
you pay for over-the-counter preparations. A large percentage of what we pay
for jars of creams, masks, etc., is the pretty packaging, huge advertising
campaigns, and sales personnel. Even with the labeling of all the
ingredients, we are not all chemists, so we are not always certain of what
we are putting on our skin and hair.
Because we live in a tropical climate I think our skin
needs cleaning more often and a face pack once a week or a fortnight can
leave you feeling good and refreshed.
This recipe was given to me by Ginny from Scotland
enjoying a holiday in Pattaya for a few weeks.
1. Cleanse your face with cleansing milk. Then take your
soap-free face wash and dot all over your face. Take a shaving brush (the
kind men use to shave) and move it over your face in a circular manner. This
is to stimulate the skin and improve blood circulation.
2. Wash off with lukewarm water and pat your face dry.
3. Lightly massage a light cream or a moisturiser in
upward strokes all over your face.
4. Prepare a solution of tealeaves and water to which
mint leaves and fenugreek seeds have been added. Boil this solution and
steam your face with it in a manner similar to taking steam inhalation
during a bad cold. Make sure the steam reaches all areas of your face. This
acts as food for the skin as it is very nourishing and refreshing.
5. Take a tissue and wipe off the moisture. This removes
the dead cells and dirt from the skin.
6. Apply a cold compress next, to close the open pores.
Take a tissue dipped in iced fruit juice (one that suits your skin) and
place the tissue on your face. Leave on for 10 minutes.
7. After that, prepare a face mask, face mask: powder and
milk for dry skin and mask powder and rose water for oily skin - and apply
all over your face and neck. Keep two swabs of moist cotton over your eyes
and wash the mask off when semi-dry or after 20 minutes.
8. If your skin needs that extra moisture, you can apply
moisturiser again.
Nightmarch
Pattaya may have the reputation of being a mini Sodom and
Gomorrah but a retired English soldier and businessman who recently visited our
fair shores and spent some time travelling about Thailand found one spot
particularly unfriendly, uninviting and relatively expensive. No, it was not
Pattaya, but, somewhat surprisingly, Koh Samui. Indeed, he told me he was glad
to get back to Pattaya where he found the people, in general, to be smiling and
friendly. Any comparison between the publicity Koh Samui receives to the type of
coverage Pattaya generally receives I’m certain would show that the former is
reviewed in glowing terms by comparison with the latter. It’s nice to know
there are people who can look a little more objectively and for once give
Pattaya the ‘thumbs up’.
Beach Party: The Play Pen (Soi Yamato) will be closed on
Saturday afternoon September 23 for a Fun in the Sun Island Beach Party over on
Koh Larn. A motley collection of regular punters and around 20 of the young
ladies who work in the ogling den will be going over to the island by speed boat
for an afternoon of fun and games. Anyone interested in joining the crew is
asked to be at the Play Pen by midday. The cost is 500 baht and includes
complimentary drinks. A 250 baht deposit is required and those who’d like to
sign up please ask for Mick or simply leave your name and the deposit with the
cashier. Food, extra drinks and beach chair hire are at your own expense.
Around the Town: Anecdotal evidence suggests that this Low
Season has been the worst since the Gulf War period (1991). One booze bar owner
made the wry comment that, “in past years you could afford to buy a new car
each year, now you’d be lucky to buy a second-hand pushbike”. One
munch-house boss told me that sales of their wholesale products to other
nosheries and boozers supplying grub had dropped by up to 60% in the last couple
of months, coinciding with a decline in rank and file in-house diners. However,
things have begun to bottom out and sales are again starting to climb. I am
aware of at least one low-budget sleeping den that is already booked out for
Christmas and there’s plenty of talk around town of the potential for a bumper
High Season.
A Word of Warning: I haven’t been able to confirm the event
described hereafter and only heard it fourth-hand, but if it happened the way
I’ve described then I can only warn booze guzzlers to be on their guard.
Around three years ago an organised gang of men and women who
were robbing foreigners in their hotels and apartments after slipping them a
‘mickey’ was plaguing Fun Town. The gang was eventually apprehended but it
seems as though there might be a new mob of copycats in town.
I’m told that a couple of weeks ago an Englishman who
supplies sausages and the odd pie to a few muncheries and bars around Fun Town
decided, after finishing his deliveries and parking his car near a small nosh
house in Soi 7, to slake his thirst at an outside boozer near Soi 8. The bar he
selected was named after a four-legged feline and had only a couple of damsels
in attendance. Almost as soon as he finished his drink, the punter began to feel
nauseous. The ladies helped him back to his vehicle, padding around in his
pockets for the car keys. He slumped into the car and fell into a deep sleep.
When he awoke, he found he’d been relieved of around 2,000 baht in cash and
his gold rings had been removed from his fingers.
Incidents like the one related above unnecessarily sully the
reputation of Fun Town. In my experience, and that of most other people I know
who have either resided or visited here over a long period of time, the majority
of people working in the adult entertainment industry are, given the nature of
the business, basically honest. As usual, it is a minority who make life
difficult for the majority.
Living in Thailand: If you decide to make a will while living
here in Thailand the law states that it should be written in Thai and requires
two witnesses. It can then be translated into English and also witnessed.
My e-mail address is: [email protected]
Copyright 2000 Pattaya Mail Publishing Co.Ltd.
370/7-8 Pattaya Second Road, Pattaya City, Chonburi 20260, Thailand
Tel.66-38 411 240-1, 413 240-1, Fax:66-38 427 596; e-mail: [email protected] |
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