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  COLUMNS

HEADLINES [click on headline to view story]:
 
Family Money: Time to return to Bonds?
 
The Computer Doctor

Successfully Yours: Witoon Wongsawat
 
Snap Shots: Looking after your investment
   
Modern Medicine: A Wayside Inn of III Repute

Heart to Heart with Hillary
 
Grapevine

Dining Out: Rossini - and the Italian tenors
 
Animal Crackers: Help, what can I do?
 
Down The Iron Road: Basic Signalling in Action - 3
 
Woman’s World
 
Nightmarch

Family Money: Time to return to Bonds?

By Leslie Wright

A few weeks back, we took a look at what bonds are, and the confusion that many investors have over how they work and the technical jargon that surrounds them.

Generally regarded as low-risk investments - hence a conservative alternative to equities - they have, however, performed poorly relative to both equities and cash over the past 18 months.

There is a lot of bad news currently factored into bond prices. The US futures market is currently predicting a rate rise of about 1% before the end of this year, with a 0.5% rise across the Eurozone and the UK with a further 0.25% rise in Japan.

What does this mean? As much of the bad news is now in bond prices, it is widely believed that there is scope for markets to be pleasantly surprised as events unfold.

Clearly, there is some uncertainty about the immediate prospect for a US rate rise: the market would be surprised if there were no further rises in the offing; but the extent of the rises could have confusing implications.

For example, another 0.25% rise could mean that further rate rises are yet to come, causing further bond market weakness as yields move to reflect possibly one or two more increases.

However, the US Federal Reserve chairman, Alan Greenspan, last year talked of “pre-empting forces of imbalance before they threaten economic stability”. This statement still holds true and we could well get another 0.5% rise - but the prospects for inflation would then reduce correspondingly.

As a result, and slightly paradoxically in light of economic theory, the larger rise could have a more beneficial effect on bond yields in the US.

With this in mind, some Fixed Interest fund managers are relatively optimistic on bond markets - despite the disappointing returns seen over the past several months.

Fixed interest securities - especially highly rated government bonds - have been one of the best choices for the lower-risk investor over the past decade. Indeed, for the most part, bonds have risen with equities.

Over the past eighteen months or so there has been a notable change in the relative and absolute performance of world bonds, with a peak in the last quarter of 1998. Since that point, with the exception of a few brief rallies, bonds have fallen.

There are several reasons for this.

Q4 98

The last quarter of 1998 was the turning point.

Bond markets had just experienced one of their best-ever short-term rallies on the back of the Russian currency devaluation in August.

This sparked fears of a global financial meltdown: confidence was low and there was a very real fear of growth deteriorating and tuning into a global recession. This environment was perfect for bond markets due to their perceived status as a “safe haven”.

However, an aggressive monetary stance by the US Federal Reserve, with interest rates being cut three times in October and November from 5.5% to 4.75%, resulted in one of the sharpest turnarounds on record for the struggling equity markets. This not only boosted confidence in the US economy, but also laid the foundations for a worldwide recovery.

Unfortunately, unlike the previous few years, what was good for the economy proved bad for bond markets.

Over the first half of 1999, the same trend continued. There was a blip in January with the Brazilian currency devaluation, but this turned out to have little lasting damage. Indeed, Latin American stock markets soared as the Real stabilised and foreign money poured back into the region, with Brazilian equities ending the year as one of the star performers of 1999.

Asian markets were even stronger. The weakest elements of the global economy were Europe and Japan - although JGB’s prospered in this environment. Global Bond markets continued to suffer due to investors’ preference for equities.

In the latter half of 1999, bond markets showed signs of hope. Inflationary fears had been building throughout the first half of the year, resulting in the first of a succession of rises in US interest rates.

Whilst this would normally be seen as a further negative for fixed interest markets, bonds actually responded positively to monetary tightening in the hope that interest rates could be kept lower for longer.

From July’s low point, the JP Morgan Global index gained almost 4% by the end of October and still managed to end the latter half of the year slightly ahead.

Although this was a big improvement on the first half of the year, bonds still substantially under-performed equity markets, which were enjoying a momentum driven rally in technology, media and telecom stocks.

Also, there were still significant concerns over the threat of building inflationary pressures - best highlighted by the price of oil which jumped from $10 to $25 a barrel during 1999.

This was further exacerbated by an autumn recovery in many core European countries that had previously been flirting with recession.

With recovery in Europe now well underway, analysts questioned whether there would still be enough spare global capacity to fund the ever-insatiable US economy. There was also the threat of huge Japanese government debt flooding the market and the effects this could have on nascent signs of recovery.

Q1&2 2000

Over the past six months bond markets have continued to be at the mercy of equity markets. When the latter have been popular - especially technology stocks - bonds have been weak.

Booming equity markets in the latter quarter of 1999 and first quarter of this year helped pushed US economic growth to new highs. Fourth quarter GDP was twice revised higher from 5.8% (annual) to 7.3%, the highest figure for 16 years.

The Federal Reserve has tried to engineer a “soft landing” in the US equity market by more monetary tightening but with limited success. The result for bond markets has been an increasingly inverted yield curve. The yield on US 10-year Treasuries reached 6.8% in January on concern that inflation would spiral out of control and force substantially higher interest rates.

The correction in technology stocks in late March and April sparked a “flight to quality”, giving a boost to bond markets and blue-chip stocks. Yields on US Treasuries fell sharply: 10-year bond yields were down to 5.77% (5.67% for the long bond) on the 10th of April.

By mid May the situation had reversed as the Nasdaq received fresh support. However, over the last few weeks, even with further technology buying, yields have reversed sharply.

Influencing factors

There are many factors that influence bond markets and at present the balance may be tilting towards the positive.

Inflation is undeniably the major concern, although recently there have been signs that it is more under control than many people thought. The recent NAPM survey indicated that production had slowed and price pressures had eased in May - producer prices were flat over the same month - and consumer inflation is falling.

If this trend continues it may influence the Federal Reserve to re-assess their hawkish stance and leave interest rates unchanged.

On the other hand, oil prices continue to rise, breaking through $30 a barrel again on Tuesday 13th June. The recent OPEC agreement seemed to indicate that if the price of oil broke through $28 a barrel, they would increase production. This could certainly pose a threat, especially in the US where consumers are up-in-arms at the recent price rise. The high level of consumer confidence also looks out of kilter with sustained economic slowdown.

Going forward

It is clear that equity markets have fundamentally changed over the past quarter.

The momentum buying that sent dot-com companies of dubious quality to multi-billion dollar valuations has perhaps disappeared for good. The focus is now much more clearly on quality.

In this environment, the fundamental attractiveness of bonds may be more appealing.

We have seen many false dawns over the past eighteen months when bonds appeared to offer good value but failed to attract support. Maybe a more rational equity market will also be positive for bonds; it worked well enough for much of the past decade. It might now be time for a return to a period of greater correlation between the performance of debt and capital.

Leslie Wright is Managing Director of Westminster Portfolio Services (Thailand) Ltd., a firm of independent financial advisors providing advice to expatriate residents of the Eastern Seaboard on personal financial planning and international investments. If you have any comments or queries on this article, or about other topics concerning investment matters, contact Leslie directly by fax on (038) 232522 or e-mail [email protected]. Further details and back articles can be accessed on his firm’s website on www.westminsterthailand.com

Editor’s note: Leslie sometimes receives e-mails to which he is unable to respond due to the sender’s automatic return address being incorrect. If you have sent him an e-mail to which you have not received a reply, this may be why. To ensure his prompt response to your enquiry, please include your complete return e-mail address, or a contact phone/fax number.

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The Computer Doctor

by Richard Bunch

This week is Part 3 of the security and privacy on your computers topic. In the previous two parts we have covered firewalls, Internet sharing and miscellaneous security related issues. In this issue we will look at some of the software available that provides Parental Control over the PC’s use.

Cyber Patrol is an Internet access management utility that also manages application usage from your PC. It allows parents or teachers to manage computer use in their own household or classroom. It also controls access from any computer to the Internet. The controlled applications include any Winsock compliant Internet application, e.g. Netscape, Internet Explorer, or CompuServe. Cyber Patrol loads during start-up and runs in the background to control access to all associated applications. With Cyber Patrol for Individual workstations, families can protect Internet access at the client level. Cyber Patrol offers easy set-up and effective online protection using the daily updated CyberLIST’s and advanced settings.

It features an easy to navigate menu, which clearly displays a comprehensive view of options and settings, allowing for easy installation and use. A three-month subscription to the professionally researched compilation of websites is arranged into four for various levels. It is also possible to restrict access to certain times of day and limit the total time spent on-line, useful for getting the homework done first! Up to 9 users plus a visitor/default is available. This conveniently allows each member of the household their own separate selections and passwords. It has access to a daily updated list of blocked sites to assure greater protection. For Windows versions only, ChatGuard will prevent children from divulging personal information on-line, such as name, phone number, e-mail address, etc.

SiteKiosk is a program that gives you complete control over what your child or young ones can view when logging onto the Internet and it’s very user-friendly, being very simple to operate. It provides many great options when you create a profile such as denying the user access to visiting illegal sites (SiteCoach Plug-in). You can specify a start-up page, you can set-up a screensaver when idling, you can also allow printing if you wish, easily modify the browser interface using a defined set of buttons, you can also hide the address button for different URLs, and more extra options that you want to incorporate. Another interesting feature that this program can do is that you can integrate it into a coin-operated computer (WebFinancer Plug-in) so users pay for how long they want to use the computer for. This is useful for a business that wants to start charging people for computer usage like arcade games. In addition, you can integrate this with a touch screen. This piece of software is not expensive and a must have program for parents who want to limit their child’s Internet browsing space.

Net Nanny enables you to configure many features such as to monitor, screen and block access to anything residing on, or running in, out or through your PC, online or off. Net Nanny is a two-way screening in real-time and only you determine what is screened with the help of the NetNanny website list, which can be downloaded free.

Obviously there are many other applications that perform similar functions and one may suit your requirements better than another.

Send your questions or comments to the Pattaya Mail at 370/7-8 Pattaya Second Road, Pattaya City, 20260 or Fax to 038 427 596 or E-mail to [email protected]. The views and comments expressed within this column are not necessarily those of the writer or Pattaya Mail Publishing.

Richard Bunch is Managing Director of Action Computer Technologies Co., Ltd. Providing professional services which include website design, website promotion (cloaking) turnkey e-commerce solutions, website hosting, domain name registration, computer and peripheral sales service and repairs, networks (LAN & WAN) and IT consulting. Please telephone 038 716 816, e-mail [email protected] or see our website www.act.co.th

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Successfully Yours: Witoon Wongsawat

Witoon Wongsawat is the new General Manager of the Diana Group, one of the most well respected business conglomerates in Pattaya, and owned by Khun Noy, better known as the Chonburi Children’s Court Judge, Sopin Thappajug.

At 44 years of age, Witoon is a remarkable man who has converted what could have been life’s problems into kick starting his own success.

He is a “local boy”, having been born in Chonburi, the fourth child in a family of eight. His father was president of the Fisheries Association and Witoon’s life would undoubtedly have been mapped out for him from the beginning - secondary school, university and then possibly a secure job in a government office. This was not to be so, however.

Young Witoon went to secondary school in Bangkok, but then, in the eyes of his father, went off the rails. At fifteen years of age he met the girl of his dreams, married and became a father. This was not the start that had been planned and Witoon’s father was not impressed.

With responsibility thrust upon his very young shoulders, it was off to work to support his wife and family, beginning as a bartender at the Hyatt Rama in Bangkok. But he enjoyed the Eastern Seaboard more and he scored a position as the Bar Supervisor at the Regent of Pattaya, now known as the Montien Pattaya.

All the time, his family kept growing, and it was not long before he had three children, two girls and one boy, to provide for as well as for his wife and himself. Diligently he applied himself to his work, working his way up the hospitality ladder as he moved through different hotels and resorts.

However, when the opportunity came his way to be the Section Head in Catering with Scandinavian Airlines, he took it. There was just one problem - they seconded him to Saudi Arabian Airways and he had to move to Saudi. “It was terrible, but the pay was good, but my wife had to stay in Thailand with the three children.”

Witoon freely admits that the four and a half years he spent in Saudi gave him some financial stability, but with his family asking for their father to return, it was back to Thailand and back onto the corporate hospitality ladder, even though the financial rewards were not there. But the family rewards were.

He continued working his way up, becoming the General Manager of the Bel-Aire Princess in Bangkok and then branching out into university lecturing on his day off, running classes on Hotel Management at Rangsit University and on Alcoholic Beverages Technology at Thammasat University. Witoon is not one to shirk from work!

From the Bel-Aire Princess, he moved into other hotels in Thailand, some in Rayong, the South and Ranong. While at these, he continued his lecturing commitments in Bangkok, travelling each week to honour his teaching responsibilities.

However, it seems that once the Pattaya bug bites you, it makes you want to come back, and Witoon is no exception. “I resigned from the position as GM at the Royal Princess, Ranong, because I wanted to come back to Pattaya - back to my home. Pattaya is not big, but we have everything here: schools, hospitals, transport, hotels and restaurants. I like it here.”

For once, he was not going to a job, so he went and visited Khun Noy, whom he had known for over ten years, because he knew she had many contacts in the industry. I said to her, “Do you know of any job openings in Pattaya?” and she replied, “Yes! Here!” So he literally fell into the Diana Group by accident - or luck.

Of course, the Diana Group is heavily based around golf, so I asked Witoon about his hobbies, expecting him to say “Golf” immediately. When he did not, I asked directly about whether he was an avid player. He replied, “I should say yes - but really it’s no,” he said with an embarrassed grin.

His real hobby is being a newspaper and magazine columnist, something he has done for over twenty years, and writes about wine for the Thai Daily News and up-market magazines such as the Bangkok version of Elle.

I asked Witoon whether he would change anything in his life if he could get a replay. “No, I am very happy. I would not change anything,” was the reply. He then went on to expand on this. “I have been married for twenty nine years and my wife helped a lot in my success. If I did not have her, I would not be here today.”

He continued by saying, “When I was fifteen I had no goals - other than to provide for my family. It was that sense that made me strive. I had to do something good for them. That is what gave me my success.” He admits that at times it had been hard, but he is proud that his children went to Assumption College and then to Assumption University. “It was difficult, but one must try.”

It is always pleasant to write a story with a “happy ending”. Witoon and his wife of twenty nine years are still together and Witoon speaks with pride of his children. “The eldest girl is an operation manager in a Bangkok Forwarding Agency, my boy is the Sales Manager at the Montien in Pattaya and our last girl graduates from University this year.” Witoon did not sacrifice his life for his family - the family is his life!

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Snap Shots: Looking after your investment

by Harry Flashman

Everyone believes in looking after your investments. After all, our financial columnist Leslie Wright has thousands of tips for you to ensure the viability and longevity of your financial investments. Harry here has now a few tips on how to look after your photographic investments - investments that can be quite big ticket investments too.

In fact, Harry Flashman’s favourite lens was a 40 mm Hasselblad wide angle, with a huge bit of glass on the front, that would cost in Thailand over 200,000 baht. Makes you think, doesn’t it. However, even humble point and shooters will benefit from being looked after. Any camera will give you better and more reliable service, and not let you down when you are about to take the one shot that will make you millions of baht in the international news market.

The first concept is to understand just what it is that will go well towards destroying your camera. This is simply: dust and grit, moisture and condensation, battery acid and being dropped. Looking after your investment is then a simple case of countering the above factors. Let’s look at these.

Moisture and condensation are the easiest ones to counter, but the dampness comes from more than just being caught out in the rain. Thailand is a hot and humid environment. How many times have you taken your camera outside and found you could not see through the viewfinder because it had steamed up? That is condensation. The best answer here is to keep small sachets of silica gel in your camera bag, or in the little “socks” you keep the lenses in. When the silica gel changes colour you can pop them back in the microwave and rejuvenate them very easily. Many bottles of medication come with perfect little sachets in the top of them.

There will also be times when you get caught in the rain, or you may even want to get rain shots. The camera body is reasonably waterproof, but you should carefully wipe the outside of the case dry afterwards, and especially blow air around the lens barrel and the lens mount.

Dust and grit is the ever present danger in the environment. How many times have you got a small piece of grit in your eye? Often, I will wager. Small particles such as that can be very bad for the lens focussing and zooming mechanics too. When the camera back is opened, while changing film for example, any airborne grit can get into the shutter mechanism and damage it, or even just get stuck on the spring loaded pressure plate that runs on the film. This can leave a linear streak on the film, damaging every negative in the series - and ruining your prized photographs. There is really no secret here. Load and reload in the cleanest environment you can, and carefully blow out the back of the camera every time you open it up. Never brush bits away with your fingers - your sweat is corrosive!

That leads us to the even more serious type of corrosion - leakage from batteries. Just about every camera in the world these days has a battery, even if it is just to drive the needle on the light meter. Acid leakage from a battery can totally ruin a modern camera, getting into the electronics so that it never works properly again. The answer here is to discard the batteries every twelve months, even if they seem to be fine, and if you are not going to be using the camera for an extended period, then take the batteries out altogether.

Finally, keep your camera in a soft case that can absorb some shocks. Not the silly plastic thing it came in. If you have not got one - then go out and buy one today. They are very inexpensive, especially when compared to the cost of the camera! Protect your investment!

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Modern Medicine: A Wayside Inn of III Repute

by Dr Iain Corness

My Anatomy professor was a brilliant, but irascible, man called Max Hickey. If it had been today, he would have probably been called “Mad Max”, but fortunately it was in the pre Mel Gibson era that I studied under Prof Hickey.

He had flowing white hair in the Einstein genre and had studied the Arts before turning to Medicine and finally becoming an Anatomist. Consequently he was one of the few ‘eloquent’ doctors I have met. He was a confirmed atheist and his wit was rapacious, as all those from the Evangelical Union who used to occupy the front rows in lecture theatres were to find out. The bridge players in the back row, he left unharmed. I was one.

My thoughts turned to Max the other day, after suffering for a few days with a recurrence of Diverticulitis. This interesting condition, (it’s not really a ‘disease’), is one of the pathologies we have produced relatively recently, where, by eating too much highly refined food we have produced little out-pockets in the wall of the bowel. These little fingernail-sized appendages are called ‘diverticulae’ (the plural of ‘diverticulum’).

This is where Max comes in, if you were wondering. I can still see Max, parading up and down in front of the doctors-to-be, and barking, “What is the origin of diverticulum?” After a decent period of silence, in which we collectively displayed our ignorance, he thundered on, “A wayside inn of ill repute, from the Latin, and don’t turn your nose up, Miss Jones in the front row.” The Evangelical Union visibly shrank, awaiting the next broadside.

Whether Max’s translation was correct or otherwise is unimportant. What is was the fact that this medical student has remembered it all his life. Those little diverticulae are certainly little dens of iniquity, in the suffering that they wreak upon the unsuspecting owner of aforesaid appendages!

What happens is that they can become inflamed, so consequently the bowel does not work properly. This is then called ‘Diverticulitis’ (“itis” referring to inflammation). The transverse colon swells so much that your stomach becomes like a drum, and it is almost impossible to do up ones trousers, and even sitting down is uncomfortable.

The first time I had these symptoms I was around 45 years old and I rang my pet gastroenterologist and relayed the symptoms. “You’ve got Diverticulitis” was his reply. “I can’t have,” said I, “I’m too young for that.” “No you’re not,” said he, “because I’ve got it too, and I’m younger than you!”

So if the gastro boys can get it, what can you do to try and avoid it? Well, eat plenty of “roughage” - vegetables - and lay off peanuts. Some bran on your morning cereal is also a good plan.

And what to do when you get a bad attack? Well, first you have to make sure it really is just Diverticulitis, but my treatment, which is not quite ‘text book’ but works for me, is plenty of fluids and 500 mgms of Ciproxin for three mornings. But do check first! OK?

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Dear Madam Hillary,

Can you help? I have recently arrived in Pattaya from my home in France. I come from a famous bell-ringing family and am finding that my historic pre-disposition is leaving me increasingly short of money. What should I do?

Kawasi

Dear Kawasi,

Hillary is delighted to make the acquaintance of such important people, and I am sure you will be a great asset to our city. Are you the Modo who has no arms, about whom everyone says, “Your face rings a bell?” Or are you the one covered in Glad-wrap called the Lunch pack of Notre Dame? Seriously though, about this bell-ringing problem; it is very easy to fix. Just stay out of bars with bells. With 3000 of them out there, there must be one without a bell. On second thoughts, I think you’ll just have to stay out of bars all together.

Dear Hillary,

Every girl I meet here seems to tell me the same story of being left with one or two children which are now being cared for by their mothers and how they send money up country to look after their offspring. Is this really the case? Would I be taking a risk becoming involved with a local girl who has children, as I have met a couple of rather nice young ladies in Pattaya, but they too have this tale of children up country?

Potential Stepfather

Dear Potential Stepdad,

Unfortunately, that tale of woe is all too true, and you will also hear that the ‘farang man have good heart’. In some instances this may be construed as ‘farang man have good wallet’ - but there is a big trap in generalisations. This may be true for some of the girls, but is not true for others. You have to be guided by your own good sense, but Hillary knows that sometimes one’s heart can over-rule the brain. If nothing else, you do know that a girl who is already a mother is capable of having children. How many do you want!

Cher Hillary,

I just didn’t know where to turn, then I remembered. If any one knows it must be Hillary! My problem is one of etiquette. Good girls must never make a ‘faux-pas’ in public. I’ve been feeling a little green about the gills on a number of runs to the local 7-11 recently. It’s the drains you know, why they don’t cover them, heaven only knows. Well I made myself a little ‘potpourri’ to keep the smells away. Et voila, it works a treat! But I’m just not sure if it’s de rigueur to carry such a thing around whilst I’m wearing my little Christian Dior number.

Please help. At your ‘merci’.

Gone Green and sounding like a frog

Dear Gone Green and Froggy,

Oooh! Isn’t Hillary the lucky one this week. Two letters from the land of the amputee frogs! Now then, I’m afraid Hillary has to take you to task about the etiquette side of things. As you so correctly point out, Hillary is the epitome of etiquette around here, but what you have to realise is that it’s not the holding of ‘pot pourri’ that’s not ‘de rigueur’ - it’s the going shopping to the 7-11 that’s not socially acceptable! On several runs too, you say in your letter. Mon Dieu! In your little Christian Dior number too! People like us, darling, don’t go shopping - we get them to deliver to us. Well my som tum lady does, as well as the water man and the guy with the gai yang. In future, do not go shopping, unless you are heavily disguised and wearing draw-string pants and a T shirt. Hillary of the haute couture has spoken! By the way, what’s all this twaddle about ‘good girls’? We’re all ‘good time girls’ round here!

Dear Hillary,

I am intrigued as to why when eating Thai food you get given just a fork and a spoon. This seems to be universal, and when I asked my husband who has travelled extensively throughout Thailand, he had no real idea either. I am really confused as to when I am supposed to use chopsticks and when to use the fork. Can you help us?

Jenny

Dear Jenny,

Like all things in Thailand there is a certain historical aspect to it, wrapped up with the inherent Thai practicality and pragmatism. Chopsticks come from the Chinese element, and many Thais (in fact some authorities would say almost 90% of Thais) come from this background, so the use of chopsticks is fine with dishes of Chinese origin. So you will be given chopsticks with many noodle dishes (kwiteo nam, for example). With ‘steam boat’ dishes you will also get chopsticks to help you fish the food from the broth - the long sticks stop you burning your fingers from the heat. On the other hand, with curries you will be given spoon and fork. There is no need for knives as everything is cut into bite sized pieces before cooking. Knives are also a symbol of aggression and so these should not be brought to the family dinner table. One last thing, you eat Thai food with the spoon, not the fork!

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GRAPEVINE

Fag Violence
A non-smoking Russian tourist this week found a novel way of dealing with a pestering cigarette salesman on Beach Road. The man from Moscow, calm and cool as a cucumber, knocked him out cold. Arrested by the police, 48-year-old Sergei Provonoff explained that he suffered from high blood pressure and had been warned by his doctor not to get irritated or angry. “The seller was persistent,” Sergei said, “and my choice was to make him unconscious or give myself a heart attack.” The vendor, still nursing a bump on the head, said he fully understood the tourist’s dilemma, adding that the 20,000 baht out of court settlement had not influenced his prompt decision to forgive and forget.

The price of scholarship
An American classics professor is returning to his homeland a disillusioned guy after meeting the girl of his dreams in a South Pattaya disco. Following a whirlwind romance, the academic was around 50,000 baht the poorer. His holiday money all gone, he reconfirmed his air ticket and, on the last day of bliss, presented the young lady with a signed copy of his recent and controversial book on agricultural techniques in the early Greek city states. He explained it was a very valuable gift. After a scant perusal, she took the learned tome and said she would be back in ten minutes. On her return, she shouted angrily, “You cheat me. The book was not valuable. The bookseller in Soi Bukao gave me only 30 baht.”

New image ahead
Great news that the tourism authority is to spend around 50 million baht to counter Pattaya’s image as Sin City. Amongst the anticipated improvements will be street landscaping, new sets of traffic lights, impressive gateways to let you know you have actually arrived in the city and a recreational park on Pattaya Hill. Not to mention yet another night market. How all this will actually discourage determined sex tourists, more beer joints and spawning nightclubs is not absolutely clear. Still, let’s be delighted that more funds are coming Pattaya’s way than used to be the case.

Seasonal trends
It has not been a good first half year for many of Pattaya’s restaurants and evening entertainment establishments. The expected upturn of European tourists in July never really materialized and the weather was awful. Optimists say that the 2000 Olympics will result in a rush of tourists stopping over en route in the Land of Smiles. Given that the average occupancy of Pattaya’s 30,000 hotel rooms is little more than 50%, let’s hope they’re right. Little by little, the marketing focus of Pattaya is spotlighting Asian tourists. The Brits and Germans are still here in force, but their numbers are about steady.

Persistent paper
Seven years on and Pattaya Mail keeps turning up in the most unlikely places. A surprised traveler found one in the seat compartment of a Kuwaiti airline jet although he was disappointed to find the crossword had already been done… The sports pages were spotted protecting fish, chips and mushy peas in a Manchester take away chippery. “’Ere you are, love, someat interesting to tek wi’ yer.” A Lancaster travel agency in UK keeps copies taken from the Internet on the counter and claims bookings are booming… Most oddly, a gambler in Phnom Penh’s posh waterfront casino kept changing his seat at the blackjack tables but always placed the newspaper under his bottom. Apparently, it had brought him luck last time.

Bank accounts
Could it really be true that the Bank of Thailand wanted all farang bank accounts closed by the end of the year unless the holder possesses a work permit or a residency book? Or will the circular be allowed to wither on the vine, or left to individual banks’ discretion? It hardly seems likely that money laundering (the stated justification) would be much reduced by such a bland measure in any case. Real criminals are hardly likely to put their ill gotten gains in a place so open to public scrutiny. The reality is that government measures in recent years have actually encouraged law abiding foreigners to open bank accounts. They need them, for example, to purchase a condo unit in their own name. They need them to secure the deposit for a one year retirement visa (800,000 baht) or for the one year investor’s visa (3 million baht) or, for that matter, the much larger sum to apply for permanent residency. They need them to persuade the immigration bureau that they have the funds here to support their Thai dependants. Some Thai embassies abroad actually want to see a bank statement in baht to issue a visa in the first place. And what of the many foreigners visiting a couple of times a year, or living here on a temporary basis, who pay their telephone, electricity and water bills by direct debit? Whilst there is admittedly a huge amount of stagnant money sloshing around in Thai banks, which are still nervous about loaning it in a still hiccupping economy, the original suggestion is surely a case of cracking a nut with a sledgehammer.

Tail piece
Opportunity knocks but once. If it knocks twice, it’s probably the Jehovah’s Witnesses.

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Dining Out: Rossini - and the Italian tenors

by Miss Terry Diner

The other evening, the Dining Out Team suddenly realised that there was one restaurant in the Royal Cliff Beach Resort that neither of us had tried - the Rossini Italian restaurant. A quick call was placed to PR person extra-ordinare, Zahid Ali, and two days later we were walking around the Royal Cliff Grand pool to approach the Italian restaurant.

On warm summer evenings, the staff set up tables around the pool, where one can watch the sun dip gently and become extinguished in the Gulf of Siam, Zahid told us. However, our chosen night was a wet summer’s evening and it was indoors for the Team.

Approach the large ornamental gates and suddenly you are in Italy. Sounds of Benamino Gigli and other Italian tenors greet you as the staff sweep open the iron grille-work portals. You are transported into an Italian piazza. Even the floor tiles are set out in a cobblestone fashion. Brick alcoves in the walls are set off with ornamental urns with pot plants. The national colours abound with red napkins adorning the green tablecloths. You could be somewhere in the world of la dolce vita.

I am sorry, but Italy makes Miss Terry come over all poetic, but we had come to eat. The menu is in a hand tooled leather folder, and the choices are as Italian as Rossini himself. Six cold appetizers (Antipasti Freddi) are offered between 140-320 Baht, with such wonderful names like “Bruschetta con pesto al pepperoni” (garlic bread with fresh pepperoni, pesto and goat cheese).

The hot Antipasti are next up (120-240 Baht) followed by a choice of four salads (95-160 Baht), including a mixed salad with smoked salmon, chopped egg, fresh tomatoes and olives. Four soups at around 95 Baht come next before a whole page of pasta. These are in small (about 140 Baht) or large (around 190 Baht) servings and include cannelloni, fettuccine, risotto, ravioli, penne pasta and spaghetti. A great choice.

Next is fish, with six choices (280-540 Baht) including garoupa, prawn, salmon and pomfret. This is followed by the same number of meat dishes (290-550 Baht) with lamb, beef, pork, veal and chicken. Almost at the end, with several Italian desserts and a page of coffee’s of every variety. Whew!

We chose the house wine, a chardonnay (Italian of course) to go with our food. Madame choosing for the first course, the romantic sounding “Misto di gamberetti, carciofi e scaglie di parmigiano” (prawns, artichoke hearts and parmesan flakes), while Miss Terry chose the “Brodo di manzo con verdura” (clear beef broth with mixed vegetables).

The prawn dish with the artichoke hearts was exceptionally good, and Miss Terry was guilty of stabbing a couple of prawns while Madame was not looking. The soup, however, was a little insipid and needed a good grind of pepper to give it some character

For mains, we followed with “Saltimbocca alla Romana” for Madame and a “Petto di pollo al limone” for me. When they arrived at the table, in true Royal Cliff style, the silver covers were lifted in unison by the ever attentive waiters. The chicken breast “al limone” was a very subtle taste, with a clean, smooth lemon sauce adding piquancy to the dish. The saltimbocca veal was done in a Marsala sauce, with just a hint of sage and was probably the dish of the evening in both our minds.

Madame then managed to put away one of the desserts, while I stuck with a cappuccino (it was an Italian evening after all)!

The Rossini restaurant was in many ways, Royal Cliff Beach Resort. Smooth, polished and impeccable in style. Not a cheap eats spaghetti house, but a fine dining restaurant specializing in Italian cuisine. Definitely the place for romantic dinners or special anniversaries!

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Animal Crackers: Help, what can I do?

by Mirin MacCarthy

Please help me, I am a homeless baby pup. I need foster care and bottle-feeding for a month. I was abandoned too young when my mother was run over. I need adoption.

What do you do when you live down a quiet soi beside a wat and somebody leaves six tiny puppies in a box outside your door? They are crying pitifully, too young to be without their mother, no chance the monks will bottle-feed them. Do you drown them, ignore them, deliver them in the quiet of night to a friend or enemy’s doorstep, better yet persuade your wife to bottle feed them for a month or two until you can find homes for them, or wait until they are three months old, give them all their shots and neuter them and release them to living rough on some far away beach?

Well perhaps some people are presented these burdens to test their intelligence and or humanity. Jurgen Harders came up trumps. He cannot care for baby puppies as he works away and his Thai wife is allergic to animals. He read about a Pattaya Animal Welfare Society, PAWS outdoor injection clinic last Saturday in the Pattaya Mail, so he found a huge cardboard box, wrote out a sign “Adopt Me For Free, I Need a Home,” in Thai and English and took it along. Braving the heat for four hours, at the end of the day he still had no takers. So he appealed to friends to no avail and then he asked PAWS what to do. They gave him explicit instructions on how to bottle feed. “Over the next month give them puppy formula milk in a bottle, every 3 hours. After that wean them on to dog biscuits soaked in soy bean milk. Dogs and cats cannot digest cow’s milk lactose. All supplies are usually available at Friendship.”

O.K., feeding taken care of, but who to do it? Jurgen asked PAWS to help out with the interim foster care while he prays for a happy ending.

So these babies’ short time survival is taken care of, but what to do in the long term? Is there anyone out there who can give a home to a potential loving companion and guide?

Look at my photo, I have five brothers and sisters. Please give me an even break. I’ll repay you with love and devotion and sloppy wet kisses as only an adorable dog can do.

If you say no, not me, then are you interested in registering as a PAWS foster carer, taking temporary care of such babies or injured or recovering animals? You do not have to do it out of the goodness of your heart. PAWS will pay you 100 baht a week plus all food and medicine to be a temporary foster carer.

Too busy? Then perhaps you might make a donation to PAWS or become a corporate sponsor so that PAWS can achieve their aim of building an animal refuge here. Lets all join in to solve our community’s problem. Please help PAWS to help.

Telephone Paws Secretary Bob Davis 225514 Ext. 224. Email Mirin [email protected] Fax: 038-231675.

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Down The Iron Road: Basic Signalling in Action - 3

by John D. Blyth

In my last two instalments on signalling I have introduced the common and basic signals used in the traditional, but fast disappearing system of signalling known as the ‘Absolute Block System’, once universal on the railways of Britain. We have used a simple diagram, here seen for the very last time, to establish what signals are needed and where they should be placed, and reference has been made to some of the essential equipment to be found in almost every signal box. It is now time to see how this is used to enable trains to move between the signal boxes in safety, with basic equipment. Let us suppose there is a train at ‘A’ (off the diagram), waiting to proceed via ‘B’ to ‘C’; all communication on train movements is carried out on the single-stroke bells provided and is held in visible form on the block instruments. So ‘A’ calls the attention of his colleague at ‘B’ with a single stroke bell, to which ‘B’ responds by repeating it; ‘A’ then asks permission to send the train, the code ‘3 pause and 1’ - from now on I shall drop the ‘pauses’, and use the for ‘3-1’; if the line is clear to ‘B’s’ Clearing Point, the block instrument at the ‘normal’ position, and all points, etc., on the line to be used by the train as far as ‘B’s’ Clearing Point are set for the safety of the train, ‘B’ will repeat 3-1, and place the block instrument at the ‘Line Clear’ position; in many cases this act will unlock the Starter at ‘A’, enabling the signalman to place it at ‘Clear’ for the train to proceed.

A fine gantry of ‘upper quadrant’ signals at the north end of Derby Station in 1959; long gone, they have been replaced by modern colour lights, and an array like this is no more to be seen in Britain.

As it departs, ‘A’ will again call ‘B’s’ attention and give him the ‘Train Entering Section’ signal (2 beats on the bell); on some lines this is not acknowledged on the bell but only by ‘B’ placing the block instrument at the ‘Train on Line’ position. ‘A’ will then call ‘C’s’ attention and offer him the train, again using the descriptive code 3-1, which ‘C’ will repeat, placing the block instrument at the ‘Line Clear’ position; he may then pull the levers to clear his own signals - usually in the order Home, Starter and Distant, the last-named not being possible to clear until the two stop signals are cleared first. ‘A’ will now be waiting for ‘B’ to send the ‘Train out of Section’ signal on the bell (2-1), and restore the block instrument to the normal position. ‘B’ will only send this signal when he has seen the train pass his box, with tail lamp on the last vehicle and nothing untoward seen on the train. If anything is wrong he will usually send the ‘Stop and Examine Train (7 beats), then phone the signalman at ‘C’ to tell him what to look for; there are special signals for a few very urgent faults, of which the missing tail lamp is one, others being a train that has become uncoupled and is approaching in more than one part; another is sent when a train does not arrive at the Box in advance when it should do; accident or failure are possibilities and the reason needs to be investigated before any more trains can pass.

In normal working, acceptance of a train is dependant on the line being clear to the Clearing Point, but it will be evident that this is not always possible; for example a train which has been accepted by ‘B’ from ‘C’ and which is to go forward to ‘A’ will cause the normal Clearing Point for the train going to ‘C’ to be unavailable, until the train for ‘A’ has passed into the section from ‘B’ to ‘A’. It may not be convenient to hold the branch train back at ‘A’ - so what is to be done? The answer is simple: Use the Clearing Point towards ‘C’, although the train is not actually going there; it can be accepted normally and held at ‘B’s’ Home Signal until the other train has passed, when the junction points can be set for ‘D’ and the second train proceeds on its way. However, should the train on the ‘Down’ line pass first, it is still necessary for ‘D’ to be brought to a stand at the junction Home Signal before the road is re-set.

Twyford East Junction, with the ‘Mayflower’ express from Plymouth passing, and typical Great Western ‘lower quadrant’ signals on the left, clear for a ‘Down’ express.

An alternative called the ‘Warning Arrangement’ was in use at some places where special authority had been given - but seldom used where passenger trains were involved. To use this authority the signalman at ‘B’, instead of acknowledging an ‘Is Line Clear?’ request by the usual repetition, would return the ‘Warning Arrangement’ bell code 3-5-5, then placing his block indicator at ‘Line Clear’; the signalman receiving this bell code would then bring the train quite or nearly to stand at his Home Signal, which would then be cleared. He would then exhibit to the driver a green hand-signal (flag by day, lamp by night), which the driver would accept by a short blast on his engine whistle or horn. He would then understand that the line was clear at Box ‘B’ only as far as the Home Signal and not at the Starter before entering the section; all this was plenty of warning as to how his train was accepted by Box ‘B’.

It was also sometimes necessary to occupy the line between the Home Signal and the Clearing Point by a movement in the ‘wrong direction’. As the code ‘Train out of Section’ was an assurance that the line was clear to the Clearing Point, it would be necessary to inform the signalman at the Box to the rear what was needed; the bell code for this ‘Blocking Back’ move, as it was called, was 2-4 if limited within the Clearing point, and 3-3 if there was a need to move a train or engine into the section, or ‘outside’ the Home Signal. The latter would leave the train unprotected by any signal nearer than the Starter at the Box to the rear, and it was therefore necessary to inform the signalman there what was being done. In either case the all-important Block Instrument would be placed at the ‘Train on Line’ position. In most cases this move was more than a reminder: ‘Train on Line’ on the instrument also operated a relay which made it impossible for the signalman at the Box to the rear to place his Starter to the ‘Clear’ or off position.

In this short series I have written little about aids to the signalman about to make a wrong move; those such as I have just mentioned were common and those which used low-voltage currents within the track itself very widespread. The modern signaling, which has made obsolete much of what I have written, is dependant almost totally on these track circuits.

It is now seven years since I saw the railways of Britain and I have been surprised to read, only in the past few days, the extent to which Absolute Block working has been dispensed in favour of more modern ways, even in country areas. But next week I will have a little more to say about working on Single Lines, where trains in both directions have to use one pair of rails - this is, of course very like the methods used on the State Railway of Thailand!

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Woman’s World: Looking like a Panda?

by Lesley Warner

After looking at myself in the mirror this morning, I thought this would be a good subject. I give all this good advice and I don’t listen to myself, and girl’s, you don’t have to be old to look like this! I am more fortunate than some, my bags are caused by indulging myself, where as some people are born with hereditary panda-bear eyes. As I have said before everything in moderation so I shall call halt this week, but some people of course like to party on. Beware, the more consecutive nights you spend on the party circuit, the increasingly worse for wear you look. By the end of the week you might see the bride of Frankenstein staring back at you in the mirror, complete with a pale face and dark circles under the eyes.

The veins beneath the thin skin under the eye cause most dark circles. As we age and receive more sun damage to our facial skin, the thin skin under the eye becomes thinner and wrinkled, which allows the veins in the fat pad under the eye to become more prominent. These veins also become more congested in people with allergies, and people with a history of eczema, hay fever or asthma often develop dark circles referred to as “allergic shiners”.

Of course, dark circles often become more apparent with a lack of sleep as well. In some people with dark skin and certain conditions, the dark circles under the eye may actually be due to superficial pigmentation of the skin, and not the veins under the skin.

Common sense solutions such as getting plenty of sleep and treating allergies can help ease the panda-bear look. Short-term tricks used by some models, such as applying cool cucumber slices or cool tea bags to the under eye area can help reduce swelling in the short term.

For those in whom the dark circles are due to true skin pigmentation, lightening agents can help, though they should be used with care in this sensitive area. However, be sure to check with your dermatologist first, to determine whether your circles are due to superficial pigment or veins beneath the thin lower eyelid skin.

The definitive treatment for those with sagging skin and dark circles under the eyes is blepharoplasty. This surgery removes the excess skin and fat pads. It is one of the most common aesthetic procedures performed by plastic surgeons.

Blepharoplasty is often combined with laser resurfacing, depending on the amount of wrinkling around the eyes. This surgery does not actually remove dark circles, but once the bags are gone there will be less shadowing, the circles will be less noticeable and your overall appearance will become more youthful and rested. The recovery time is one to two weeks.

What You Should Know about the Risks and Benefits of Plastic Surgery

Plastic surgery is expensive. Any surgery is potentially dangerous, including plastic surgery. Complications are rare but they do occur, ranging from scarring to fatalities. Plastic surgery may be particularly risky if you have certain health conditions (e.g. diabetes). Everyone is different. Some people do much better than others, even when treated by the same plastic surgeon. It may take several weeks or months before your face fully recovers from plastic surgery.

Plastic surgery does not slow down the aging of the skin but may actually accelerate it. Therefore, plastic surgery is not a substitute for skin rejuvenation. Actually, after a plastic surgery you should be even more diligent in preserving your skin’s youth.

Lastly, be very careful which plastic surgeon you decide to use; speak to other people who have had successful surgery with him.

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Nightmarch

Keeping the Streets Safe: Had occasion to witness the undercover Tourist Police in action the other night along Beach Road protecting the moral standards of the town. A number of persons of the second category were gathered near street lamp number 69 hoping to become better acquainted with passers-by and their wallets when they were approached by the constabulary and asked to produce their ID cards. One flighty young type gathered ‘her’ high heels and hitched up ‘her’ skirt and took off as the coppers pounced. From my vantage point she would have given Marion Jones a run for her money in the Olympic 100 metres. Actually, ‘she’ could probably have lined up against Mitch Greene and given him a workout.

Living in Thailand: No matter what you do here in Thailand, the law states that you have to pay VAT. There is no such thing as VAT exempt.

Seen Around Town: Is this the best free show in Fun City? Every day at the two Mike Department stores those staff not attending to customers assemble at the front of their respective areas and, while music is piped through the speaker system, they perform a series of light arm and leg exercises. Usually the tune in question is played three or four times so the whole show lasts for around ten minutes or more.

From certain angles it looks like a bunch of lunatics having run amok in the asylum, as arms and legs are flung about all over the place. The idea, of course, is to get the blood circulating through bodies that have been staring for hours into compact mirrors applying and re-applying makeup and checking for wrinkles and spots. And that’s just the boys. The exercises take place at about 3:00 p.m. and some 15 minutes before closing (around 11:00 p.m.), and it won’t cost you a thing...unless, of course, you are enticed into buying a shirt or something.

Live and Learn: Recently a friend of mine took the one-day visa trip by minibus to the Cambodian border. While waiting for the various visas to be issued and passports to be stamped he pulled out a bag of one baht coins and proceeded to deposit a modest sum into the hands of the local beggar children. His kind gesture turned into a scene from Nightmare on Elm Street as every urchin within screaming distance - hands outstretched and clamouring for more - quickly surrounded him. In desperation he threw a chunky handful into the air and used the diversion to retreat to the minibus. However, the throng failed to disperse and pressed forward, demanding not “one baht” but “one hundred baht”. He made it back to the minibus, along with the rest of the passengers, but the urchins continued banging on the doors and windows until the bus started up and left town. Needless to say, he was hardly popular with his travelling companions and has vowed never to throw money around like that again.

In the Hot Spots: I have noticed a disturbing trend in some dens over the past few months, but I’m not sure if it’s me they’re picking on or if it is happening across the spectrum.

The waitresses in some places seem to have taken it upon themselves not to return change, if that change amounts to five baht or less. I generally leave amounts of five baht or less as a tip anyway, but I feel I should at least be given the opportunity of making that decision, not having it made for me by the waitress. One of the worst offenders happens to be my favorite place in Soi Diamond. One night I sat and waited until someone asked me if I wanted another drink. I politely informed her that I was waiting for my change. A few minutes later another girl appeared with five baht on a tray. On this occasion I took it. I’d be interested to hear if other people have had similar experiences.

For the hungry: For good Thai food, at really cheap prices, try the Fongsabu Restaurant in Soi Day-Night - diagonally opposite the Flamingo Hotel. A clean, well-run noshery with most dishes priced between 20 and 50 baht. Service can be a bit slow at times, but then this is Thailand.

My e-mail address is: [email protected]

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