|
Family Money: You
reap what you sow
By Leslie
Wright
Last week we examined the somewhat daunting prospect
Joe is facing - how to fund a 25-year retirement pension adequately from
only 10 years of savings from his overseas contracts.
He had left his long-term financial planning rather
late, and the sacrifices he would need to make to achieve his objective
would be a major burden on his budget.
Some readers may have been perturbed by the figures
quoted in that article. But they are very real and realistic, I assure
you. And very sobering.
So the question that naturally follows is just what
amount of capital should be built up to fund a certain amount of draw down
- whether this is for funding the children’s college education, building
your dream-home, assuring your retirement pension, or whatever?
How much for how long?
Table 1 shows how much capital is required to fund a
draw down of 1000 money-units, starting now, and how this amount has to be
increased to allow for the effects of future inflation.
Table 1: To produce a draw down of 1000 money-units per
month, assuming 10% growth p.a., requires capital of:
|
If
inflation averages: |
|
Drawdown Period (Years)
|
0%
|
3%
|
6%
|
9%
|
|
5
|
50,500
|
53,440
|
56,550
|
59,840
|
| 10 |
80,940
|
90,760
|
102,140
|
115,310
|
| 15 |
99,400
|
117,010
|
138,680
|
166,530
|
| 20 |
110,600
|
134,950
|
168,660
|
214,880
|
| 25 |
117,400
|
147,940
|
193,070
|
260,020
|
| 30 |
121,000
|
157,070
|
212,900
|
302,170
|
|
For instance, if you are thinking of retiring now and
need to draw $1000 a month to fund your lifestyle, and anticipate living
for another 20 years, and believe inflation will average 6% a year
throughout that time (which is a reasonable assumption, given past
history), you would need to have accumulated investment capital of about
$170,000. This should be securely invested in a cost-effective offshore
investment vehicle producing growth averaging 10% a year - the offshore
industry standard in US dollar terms.
Far away future?
Some people still in the flower of youth may put off
starting any sort of capital-accumulation savings program with the excuse
that they don’t know where they’ll be or what their income will be in
a few years time - and anyway, retirement is still too far into the future
to worry about now.
This is a fatuous argument. Over the years I’ve met
many people who had fallen into the same trap of complacency, and later
come to regret it. By the time they realised their capital-accumulation
program was inadequately funded - whether this was for their children’s
education, a down-payment on their dream-home or their retirement pension
- it is often too late to do something about it without painful sacrifices
to their current or future lifestyle, as was discussed last week.
Other needs for capital
For those who are disinterested in their far-away
retirement, there are all sorts of other reasons for accumulating capital.
As mentioned earlier, building a dream home is one (as
farangs cannot get a mortgage in Thailand); ensuring their children’s
education to international standards is another (and a very expensive one,
comparable to building a house); starting up their own business (which
without adequate capitalisation may be doomed to failure - as many Pattaya
entrepreneurs have already discovered); having a ‘cash cushion’ under
you in case you are out of work - as frequently is the case with
short-term contracts that are the norm nowadays.
The list goes on - but in all cases, the end result is
the same: having the capital there when you need it gives you the freedom
of choice. Without it, you don’t have a choice.
Guaranteed state pension?
As for neglecting your retirement funding, it is worth
noting that developed nations are already admitting either openly or
indirectly through proposed changes in legislation (such as raising the
retirement age to 70 in the U.K. and introducing a means test in
Australia, as indeed already exists in New Zealand) that they will have
insufficient funding to provide a state pension to the generations now
under the age of 45.
This means quite simply that if you haven’t made
independent arrangements for your retirement years (which are likely to be
longer than your grandparents’), those years won’t be very comfortable
- and you won’t be able to rely on the state systems, even if you
qualify.
It is true that some people are shocked and put off by
the amounts of capital that realistically may be needed to provide for
continuing their present lifestyles for perhaps 20 years or more after
their salaries stop - as was the case with Joe, which we examined last
week.
But behaving like an ostrich does not make the blow
less painful when it comes. On the contrary, without a financial cushion
around you, you will feel the pain even more.
The painful truth
If you have a tummy-ache, a conscientious physician
will carry out appropriate tests and tell you if these show you have
malignant stomach cancer rather than leaving you in a false sense of
security with some mumbled platitudes about indigestion and some
sugar-coated placebos. Similarly, a financial advisor with professional
integrity will tell you the painful truth of how much you need to save in
order to achieve your financial goals and ambitions, having once
established these with you.
Yes, you may get a nasty shock. You may indeed not be
able to afford to save that much - just as if you’re diagnosed with
cancer you may not be able to afford the required amounts of radiation
& chemotherapy if you don’t have medical insurance (or maybe even if
you have, depending on your coverage).
The choices may indeed be painful.
But once you know the target amount you will need to
amass in order to retire comfortably - or build your dream-home, or fund
your children’s college fund, or whatever - and what it will take to
achieve it, your financial advisor will be able to help you work out an
affordable way to get started relatively painlessly.
Just the same as pains in your tummy may be only gas,
or may be symptoms of a variety of ailments far worse.
You can ignore them and hope they go away. But if they
don’t (and old age certainly won’t), you’d better do something about
it before it’s too late and you have no options left.
Putting off starting something because you’ve still
got plenty of time before you need to worry about it will cost you more
dearly later, one way or another.
Better to start something - even if it’s way below
what you’ve been advised or already know you need to be putting aside
regularly - than waiting until you can afford the full amount that may be
required.
Because that day will probably never come.
Each month, each year you delay getting something going
will raise the amount you will need to put aside to reach that same
target.
And this means either you won’t reach your goal, or
you will be inclined to take on undue risk in the hope of getting there by
a shortcut.
Reaching that target will become more and more
unlikely, and the attempt more and more painful as time passes.
It’s never too early to start saving. Even modestly.
And let me assure you, having recently passed yet another annual milestone
on the road to death, time does race past faster each year!
Leslie Wright is Managing Director of Westminster
Portfolio Services (Thailand) Ltd., a firm of independent financial
advisors providing advice to expatriate residents of the Eastern Seaboard
on personal financial planning and international investments. If you have
any comments or queries on this article, or about other topics concerning
investment matters, contact Leslie directly by fax on (038) 232522 or
e-mail [email protected].
Further details and back articles can be accessed on his firm’s website
on www.westminsterthailand.com.
Editor’s note: Leslie sometimes receives e-mails to which he is
unable to respond due to the sender’s automatic return address being
incorrect. If you have sent him an e-mail to which you have not received a
reply, this may be why. To ensure his prompt response to your enquiry,
please include your complete return e-mail address, or a contact phone/fax
number.
The Computer Doctor
by Richard Bunch
From Sue Jacobs, Bangkok: I like to think of myself
as computer savvy, well I can try! Anyway, most of the time my computer
and me get on very well together; it’s a love hate relationship. A
couple of weeks ago, I installed Windows 2000 Professional. Initially
there was a problem with the modem not working, but I solved this
eventually and since then everything has worked just fine, well better
than it did under Windows 98. However, when you install it there aren’t
any choices as to what components are installed or not installed as the
case may be. In particular, I use my computer exclusively for work and
don’t want the games on it. Apart from the disk space they take up, I am
not strong willed enough not to play a little when I know I should be
working. I have asked my friends who have also installed Windows 2000 and
no one seems to know. Can you help?
Computer Doctor replies: Well, it’s not just
games that are installed by default during Windows 2000 set-up; these
components are also installed by default: Accessories (Calculator, Clock,
and so on) Multimedia, Accessibility options. As well as being installed,
these components do not appear in the Add/Remove Programs tool in Control
Panel after set-up.
This is what you need to do to display these components
during set-up or in the Add/Remove Programs tool after set-up has
completed.
You need to be mindful that these procedures need to be
followed exactly, otherwise your system will not function correctly. That
said, the nitty-gritty is:
Option 1: After set-up has completed, in the
%SystemRoot%\Inf folder on the system volume, use a text editor, i.e.
Notepad, (DON’T use anything like Word which will try to format it) to
open the Sysoc.inf file. Locate the “old base components” line, then
for each component you want to appear in the Add/Remove Programs tool,
remove the comma and “Hide” comment.
For example, change <Games=ocgen.dll, OcEntry,
games.inf, HIDDEN,7> to <Games=ocgen.dll, OcEntry,games.inf,7 >
ignoring the <>, also remove the “HIDE” option from the
“AccessUtil=” line. If you leave this option hidden, then none of the
other components in the “old base components” section are available in
Add/Remove Programs. Save and then close the file.
Option 2: Displaying the items during set-up, this is
really only practicable in a networked environment. For stand-alone
scenarios I recommend using Option 1. Copy the I386 folder to a
distribution share, then expand the Sysoc.in_ file using the following
command expand -r sysoc.in_ edit the Sysoc.inf file using steps 2-4 above
then rename the Sysoc.in_ file to Sysoc.bak.
Remember if it goes belly-up, there isn’t a back
door!
Send your questions or comments to the Pattaya Mail at
370/7-8 Pattaya Second Road, Pattaya City, 20260 or Fax to 038 427 596 or
E-mail to [email protected].
The views and comments expressed within this column are not necessarily
those of the writer or Pattaya Mail Publishing.
Richard Bunch is Managing Director of Action Computer
Technologies Co., Ltd. Providing professional services which include
website design, website promotion (cloaking) turnkey e-commerce solutions,
website hosting, domain name registration, computer and peripheral sales
service and repairs, networks (LAN & WAN) and IT consulting. Please
telephone 038 716 816, e-mail [email protected]
or see our website www.act.co.th
Successfully Yours: David
Richardson
by Mirin MacCarthy
I sat at the keyboard wondering just how I could kick off a
story on David Richardson and suddenly the words “kick off” reminded me
that underneath the mild family man exterior there lurked a real live kicking
gouging football player.
David was born in New Zealand some thirty five years ago
and has only a faint accent from his childhood. There he was brought up on
soccer, but since coming to Thailand he has moved on to Rugby, sometimes
called “thugby”. Since all thugs work in gangs, David joined the local one
and is now apparently a strong member of the Pattaya Panthers Rugby team
hooligans.
 So
what sort of man is David Richardson and his seeming contradictions? David’s
father was a civil engineer and it was the attraction of an engineering
apprenticeship at New Zealand’s North Island oil refinery and the
opportunity to leave school that spurred him to join the work force. The fact
that at that time there was expansion at the refinery and there was an
opportunity to make some serious money as well, sealed David’s career
choice.
After his apprenticeship, David became a piping engineer at
the refinery for five years. Then in 1986 he moved, “To Auckland, the big
city, for a year as supervisor of a LPG gas depot. I have always been a city
kid, there is always some activity there,” he laughed. It was no green
rolling hills and sheep farming for this city boy!
David’s next career move was to join a large engineering
firm, “Robert Stone” where he spent nine years as a contract site manager.
It wasn’t all work and no play for David though, as he interrupted this
stint in 1989 to take three months leave of absence, travelling around Europe.
“I was travelling with Kiwi friends, it was great fun. I lived in London and
Glasgow for a while. It made a big impression on me; it was a great experience
coming from a tiny city in a small country. I loved the buzz the activity,
there is always something going on in a big city.” Obviously those days in
the oil refinery had given him a ‘nose’ for exhaust fumes!
David was likewise impressed with Bangkok on his four-day
stopover there in 1989 and again in 1995, (the world’s largest plume of
exhaust smoke in those days)! This became a deciding factor to spur him on to
take up a position here. So in 1997, back in EnZed David took a position at CR
Industrial Services, a contractor to the NZ oil refinery. The reason? It was
an Australian/New Zealand firm doing a lot of work in Thailand. They had set
up an industrial services company with four different divisions to provide
maintenance and workshop facilities to service the petro-chemical industry.
When his chance came to leave the cold of New Zealand,
David jumped at it. The post of General Manager of CR. Industrial Services,
Mechanical Engineering division at Maptaput became available, and he was off
to Thailand. He left so fast that his wife and young son and baby daughter had
to follow him out here two months later.
But make no mistake about this man. David puts his family
first as the most important thing to him, “My family generally, and my kids,
are just awesome. Success to me is twofold, having a happy family life and
being able to live the life style you want, and to see my kids grow up
healthy. Workwise it is achieving something positive. I came here to set up
the mechanical division and it went better than all expectations. I enjoy
going to work in the mornings. I get satisfaction from achieving. We have a
good Thai group at CR. I enjoy working with the Thais, they are friendly and
helpful and always smiling. ‘
David’s plans for the future are to stay right where he
is, with the proviso of - as long as his family continues to be happy here.
For himself, he is looking forward to see both the company and his family
continue to grow.
His advice to other farang managers is, “The key to
working here successfully is coming to grips with the culture and being able
to relate to the Thai staff.” Factors that David Richardson has obviously
come to grips with. But always remember that here ia a man who came from
soccer, and what is more he has upped his game to rugby. His advice come
across as mild mannered words - but from a hard hitter.
Snap Shots: Photography
Processing D&P
by Harry Flashman
The initials D&P in the photographic world refer to
Develop and Process. That’s what happens when you put your roll of film
into the local shop and one hour later you get your prints back and all
the negatives in a sleeve. The fact that this can be done in such a short
time really is a technological marvel. It is not so long ago that all this
was done in what were referred to as “Dip and Dunk” tanks in a
darkroom with a solitary red safety light bulb at the far end of the room.
Working at full speed you might get 36 prints back in
36 hours if you were lucky. So with all this advancement in technology,
why is the standard of processing one of the major complaints that Harry
hears in this town? Well, unfortunately it is not inferior technology -
but deficiency in application by the human element. You see, while
technology will keep your negatives in the development “soup” for the
correct amount of time and technology will expose the photographic paper
for the correct number of split seconds and technology will then slosh the
exposed paper through more “soup” at the correct temperature, this
alone does not guarantee a pin-sharp print with the correct contrast and
colour balance. A human element comes into play. Chemicals must be
replaced when they are getting old – and humans must do that. Humans
must check the contrast and colour balance of the printing machine.
Humans must check the focussing of the negative on to
the photographic paper. In other words, humans oversee the technology and
finally must accept the responsibility for the final product.
Finding a good human is more important than finding a
newer machine in Harry’s book. Look at the two prints this week. Even
with the disadvantages of black and white newspaper printing, it is
obvious that the right hand print is much better than the left hand one.
Small details in the “girl’s” dresses are all there with the
correctly executed print, while in the poor print it is just a washed out
blur.
Now both of those prints were made from the same
negative, through state of the art auto-processing machines. The only
difference was that in one shop the technician did not care, while in the
other, the human technician applied herself to the job in hand and
produced as good a print as could be done from the same negative. Needless
to say, that girl still does all the D&P work for Harry Flashman, and
if needs be, I follow her from shop to shop!
So how do you tell if you are getting good work from
your local D&P shop? Fortunately this is easy to do. You take a strip
of negatives and ask another outlet to print the pictures and compare. If
you end up with results like the two shots in this week’s column, you
know what to do!
Of course, if your negatives are blurry and incorrectly
exposed, you will never get the best result either – no matter who is
behind and driving the processing machine! If you are consistently getting
poor results irrespective of where you put your films in for D&P, then
you should sit down and examine your negatives preferably with a
magnifying glass. If the negatives are too dark or too washed out, then
your camera is having an exposure problem. If your negatives are not
sharp, then there is a focussing problem, or you are not holding the
camera steady enough. Once again, it’s that human element!
However, if you are getting good consistent results
from your D&P outlet then thank your technicians. Harry does with his.
But if you are having problems then try the Kodak Royal Express on Second
Road, close to the Golden Beach Hotel. You will not be disappointed.
Modern Medicine: The
New Wonder Cure!
by Dr Iain Corness
I would like to say, with all true modesty of course,
that I was the one who discovered this new wonder cure, but I must admit I
am not. The mixture has been shown to have a beneficial effect on kidney
function and kidney stones, gastro-intestinal disorders, as an
anti-hangover treatment, is vitally involved with blood circulation and is
even required for good vision! This compound has been around for some time
and involves the use of hydrogen and oxygen in specific proportions and
has been shown to be so beneficial that it has been called by the medical
scientists, the Wonderful And Totally Energizing Resource, or W-A-T-E-R
for short.
Now, having got this far into this week’s column,
don’t give up now! There’s lots to say about this wonderful cure-all.
W-A-T-E-R is probably the finest and most underused medical mixture you
will ever come across.
So let’s look at some of the effects of W-A-T-E-R on
some common ailments. Take Cystitis for example. Almost every woman has
had, at some time, this distressing complaint. Burning and scalding and
going for a pee every twenty seconds and resulting in a miserable
teaspoonful. The immediate first aid treatment for this is lots of
W-A-T-E-R. By literally “flushing” the bladder through, you help
dilute and wash away the infecting organism. Makes sense, doesn’t it!
Kidney stones are a problem in the tropics. Small
concretions of “salts” that form in the hidden nooks and crannies of
the kidney. What should you do to stop getting these? Drink lots of
W-A-T-E-R, that’s all. And if you find you have one already, the best
medicine is, yes you guessed it, W-A-T-E-R
Now let us look at the other very common complaint that
so many people get in Thailand (even me!) and that is Diarrhoea. In this
condition you lose fluids very quickly. The immediate treatment?
W-A-T-E-R! And lots of it!
Now, very surprisingly, what do you think is the best
treatment for Constipation? Once again, it is W-A-T-E-R! How amazing! The
treatment for both conditions (which are really the opposite of each
other) is the same compound - W-A-T-E-R.
Now with the old hangovers - even though the best
“treatment” is not to drink too much in the first place, the next best
thing is lots of W-A-T-E-R before going to bed and more W-A-T-E-R again in
the morning. What a wonderful compound indeed!
Everyone seems to be talking about the dangers of
flying and getting blood clots in the legs, these days. One of the prime
ways to get this disorder is to not have enough W-A-T-E-R in your system
when you are flying. And what is the preventive treatment? W-A-T-E-R of
course! The airlines are so aware of this, they even supply W-A-T-E-R to
the passengers free of charge. Now that surely proves it.
Those of you who have found me in my office will have
noted there is always a glass of W-A-T-E-R on my desk - and me? I’m
always well! It’s the W-A-T-E-R!
 Dear
Hillary,
There used to be a little variety show at the top end
of town called the Rhino or something similar. My friends who I suggested
should go and see it on their trip over to Pattaya have told me that they
could not find it. Do you know where it is now?
Out of Touch
Dear Out of Touch,
Hillary thinks you were probably referring to the
recently departed L’Hippo that was attached to the Welkom Inn.
Unfortunately the owners decided that the venue was too far from the
centre of Pattaya and closed that part of their operation. Tell your
friends to go to Alcazar or Tiffany Show for the Las Vegas style shows, or
Malibu on the corner of soi Post Office and 2nd Road for ‘theatre in the
round’. Some of the L’Hippo girls are working in Malibu.
Dear Hillary,
Last year on my holidays I met a girl called Noi at a
bar in Soi 8. I wrote to the bar to tell her I am coming over again, but I
got no answer, so I asked a friend who was coming to Pattaya to look her
up. He has now told me that she does not work there any more, but other
friends of mine have told me that she was with him for the week he was in
Pattaya. Hillary, who do I believe? I’m shattered.
Confused
Dear Confused (and shattered),
With friends like yours, who needs enemies? However,
Hillary thinks you should just come over and not take Soi 8 too seriously.
Pattaya is a place to have fun by the sea. To expect that Noi is waiting
for your annual letter is perhaps just a trifle optimistic.
Dear Hillary,
My husband and I have decided to retire in Thailand and
Pattaya looks to be the most likely place for us. We are interested in
purchasing either a house or an apartment, but we are not sure of what the
laws are in relation to this. We have heard conflicting advice and
wondered if you could steer us in the right direction?
Retirees
Dear Retirees,
Hillary is always delighted to welcome people with
money to Pattaya (as are many of the residents in this town)! However, it
is really not Hillary’s place to tell you how to spend your nest egg -
unless you want to spend it on Hillary of course (you can start with
French Champagne, and I’ll tell you the rest after I inspect your pass
books)!
Seriously, when you want serious advice then go to the
professionals. In your case you want a Real Estate firm and a lawyer. Look
for ones with credentials and long standing reputation. They do advertise
in the Pattaya Mail, by the way.
Dear Hillary,
Is it safe or advisable to rent a motorcycle? You hear
such horrendous stories about rip-offs, yet some people say that it is no
problem. I ride a moped in London, so I think I know how to behave in
traffic. Do you think it is any different in Thailand?
Moped Murphy
Dear Moped Murphy,
What do you mean, “behave in traffic”? I hope you
behave all the time, no matter where you are! Motorcycle rental, now
that’s different. Beware scams and non insurance. There is also the
chilling statistic of two point three people dying every day from
motorcycle accidents over here. Don’t be a point three! Best wishes.
Dear Hillary,
Re: Waney poo (Vol. VIII, No. 24) and others who want
to send money to Thailand. ATMs are by far the easiest way to transfer
money here. I use an ATM card to get my money from the US. Before I left,
I set up a joint account in the name of my son and me, and I have the ATM
card for it. My son banks elsewhere. I could have gone to another bank,
too, but I linked this account to mine. I can transfer funds between
accounts in person, by phone, or over the internet. I can put in what I
want a person in Thailand to have, plus a cushion for ATM fees and
currency fluctuations. Someone with the ATM card can take out no more than
I put in, as long as I keep access to my primary account secure. Also, the
ATM card can be cancelled any time. A person in Thailand has to know how
to use the card, but I have found the Thai to be quick learners. Have I
overlooked some fallacy in this?
Richard
Dear Richard,
In theory you have not. However, this is Thailand and
credit card fraud ranks high as a national felons’ pursuit, so much so
that many banks are reluctant to issue cards for use here. Hillary still
feels that by transferring money directly to a Thai person’s bank
account has less hassles attached to it compared to the ATM card method,
such as ensuring cushions for ATM fees and currency fluctuations as you
note yourself, and also there is no card that can be lost or stolen or
abused. In the end it is up to the individual, but I know which is easier
and ultimately safer.
GRAPEVINE
|
Monkey business
A monkey is being blamed for a car accident
in which a farang collided with a petrol pump believing it to be a
soft drinks machine. Helmut Schnell, 53, had been visiting a Chonburi
area zoo when a monkey swung from its tree perch, swiped his glasses
and hurled them into a hippo hole. One of the lumbering animals then
promptly trod on them. Helmut, who is very shortsighted, tried to
explain the position to zoo keepers but they thought he wanted to buy
food to give to the animals. In desperation, Helmut decided to drive
himself back to Pattaya. The severely squinting German pulled off the
highway to buy a Coke when the accident happened.
Trans-Pacific
A hooker conman specializing in female
impersonation has been arrested after convincing a wealthy
American’s family that he was the daughter of an oil magnate and a
worthy girlfriend for their son. The transvestite, known only as Koo,
met 41 year old American Abe Garfield in a darkly lit bar whilst he
was holidaying in Pattaya and they began a mini romance. Soon Koo was
borrowing heavily from both Abe and his family in San Francisco who
even sent out $5,000 to fund the engagement party. The villainous
trannie was finally exposed, literally, after refusing Abe full
intimacy on the grounds she did not believe in sex before marriage.
UBC adverts
Insiders say you can soon expect to see paid
advertisements on many of UBC’s satellite channels. At the moment,
foreign adverts (say on CNN) are usually blanked out and replaced by a
list of Thai hotels offering the UBC network. Current Thai law does
not allow advertising in this context, but that may be set to change.
UBC argues that foreign sponsorship would raise revenue, improve
programming and bring the country into line with international
practice. Critics argue that, because UBC has a near monopoly since
the merger with UTV and the collapse of Thai Sky, the customer would
lose out and be constantly bombarded by tedious promotions. No prizes
for guessing who will win this argument.
Golden Triangle visa run
If you only want thirty days on arrival, or
need to use the second entry on your existing double entry Thai visa,
consider driving or taking the flight to Ranong. Here you connect with
a ferry to the Andaman Club hotel on the island off Victoria Point in
Burma. This is almost the only crossing you can make to Burma where a
visa is not necessary. As long as you visit the casino and don’t
stray from the small island, the usually tough visa regulations and
the requirement to buy foreign exchange certificates are conveniently
waived. Of course, the whole trip will cost you much more than a day
trip to the Cambodian border where similar services are provided.
|
Tasty pizza
GEOC (Grapevine Eating Out Collective), none
of whom weigh in at less than a hundred kilos, recently fancied some
Italian food and ventured out into the wilds of Sunee Plaza.
Chaplin’s restaurant, on the original Sunee Plaza strip, was well
worth the trip. The freshly buttered warm garlic toast made a tasty
companion to the vegetable soup, and the pasta dishes were spot on.
The varied range of full sized pizzas come with plenty of generous
toppings. It was a little disappointing to find the Italian desserts
were “off”, but after all this is still the quiet season. The
adverts and leaflets for the trips to Koh Samet, which bedeck the
walls, looked to be good value to us.
Is he in trouble?
Reader FJ has had a couple of sleepless
nights. He phoned up a farang computer guy to come round and fix a
virulent virus. Whilst work was in progress, undercover police arrived
and handcuffed the repairer for working without a permit. FJ is
worried that he too may be arrested as the offence took place at his
house. Actually, if that is all there is to the story, it is very
unlikely that FJ has anything to worry about. It is the worker’s
responsibility to make sure he is legal and not the customer’s. That
said, rip off computer merchants, who take your money and deliver
nothing, are not unknown in Sin City. Use the services of a company
that has a good track record in Pattaya. And listen to the
recommendations of satisfied friends who have been given value for
money recently.
AMEX again
Farangs keep on complaining that, when they
try to use their American Express cards at authorized outlets in our
fair city, the reaction at the shop or store is less than euphoric.
The reason, of course, is that Amex charges the retailer an additional
3% or more, certainly more expensive than major competitor cards. So a
small surcharge is sometimes passed on to you, especially where the
profit markup is small. On discounted air tickets for instance or
small purchases. Amex will advise you to file a complaint in writing
so that the company can investigate. Markups are against the Amex
code. One suspects, however, that if all surcharged Amex card holders
actually made a stand, many Amex outlets would simply stop accepting
the card. The real question to ask is why Amex is more expensive for
retailers to operate.
Tailpiece
Spotted in the window of a hairdresser’s
shop. “We have hair extensions and wigs fully air conditioned.” |
Dining Out: The
Samsara Lifestyle - Five Star Food!
by Miss Terry Diner
The Samsara restaurant/pub/nightclub has now been open for
more than one year and has apparently carved out quite a niche for itself in
the local community. As regards the restaurant side, a little over 12 months
ago the Dining Out Team visited Samsara and returned well fed and impressed. A
year down the track, would it be as good?
 The
surroundings at Samsara are definitely impressive. The restaurant area is on
an elevated perimeter platform and does separate diners from drinkers. It is
also on the opposite side from the band/entertainment area, so again they have
managed to keep the restaurant apart from the “club”.
Decor is modern continental, as are the owners! Orange, the
“royal” colour of Holland, predominates, with orange upholstered chairs
and bright orange placemats on the tables.
The menu has been changed somewhat since the last time we
visited and the food is also now under the watchful eye of Chef Narong. It
begins with Starters (B. 130-265) and from there it is into Pizzas and Pastas
(B. 190-285) and that is followed by a section for Thai food, with the
servings around 140 baht each. The next page is almost all the Charcoal
Specials (B. 285-650). There are also four individual choices of sauces and
four different styles of potatoes to choose from. Desserts and Tappas come
next, to complete the offerings.
Madame selected the Smoked Salmon starter to be followed by
the Rib Eye steak with a Port/garlic sauce, while I chose the Duck Salad
starter to be followed by the Fillet of Salmon with a Bearnaise sauce. While
we waited, hot freshly baked bread rolls were brought to the table along with
a very large pepper mill. Madame sipped on a glass of very nice chardonnay,
while Miss Terry stuck with the usual Singha Gold.
The first surprise of the evening came with the starters -
they were huge! The salmon came with finely chopped egg and a sharp piquant
sauce with horseradish base and was simply excellent. My duck was also very
well prepared and served - and did taste of duck (so often the taste gets lost
in the preparation somehow) and the capsicum, lettuce and red cabbage in the
balsamic vinegar provided superb accompaniment.
We sat back to let those settle and then the mains arrived
- and these were even larger! Healthy appetites, these Hollanders! Each dish
comes with its separate jug with the chosen sauce as well.
Madame’s steak just fell apart under the knife and was
cooked precisely to her order. She also remarked on just how well done the
vegetables were - “Cooked to perfection,” were her exact words. The port
wine and garlic sauce certainly went well with the rib eye as well, as I can
attest from my sampling.
My salmon fillet was not only very large, but also very
excellent, flaking apart easily and when I smothered it with the sauce it was
simply fabulous! These were certainly two outstanding main dishes from the
kitchen of Chef Narong.
The size of the plates had beaten us both, and even the
thought of the desserts was too much. We did manage a Calypso coffee and an
Irish coffee to finish off, but it was a struggle!
There is no doubt in our minds as to the standard of the
food that we had that night at Samsara. It was five star food - and in huge
proportions.
By the way, while parking can be a problem on Beach Road,
Samsara have a valet parking service and it was a pleasure to just pull up
outside and let the attendant take care of the rest.
It is worthwhile making a visit to Samsara a complete
evening - dinner and then the nightclub. You will not be disappointed with the
food. Highly recommended.
Animal Crackers:
Hill Mynahs
by Mirin
MacCarthy
As the name suggests Hill mynahs are birds that prefer to
live in the hills. One notable and prized attribute of these little black
and yellow beauties is they are brilliant mimics.
The best talkers are the Greater Indian Hill mynah and
the Java Hill mynah. The former has been widely domesticated both here and
abroad because of their uncanny ability to duplicate the human voice. Be
warned it will even replicate the exact tones of you singing out of key, the
telephone ringing and street vendors calling. Strangely, though this bird
has the ability to mimic speech, it will not imitate the sounds of other
birds.
Now is the time to buy a cute pair of babies from the
market, if you are looking for relatively cheap (approx 1000 baht) excellent
companions and talkers.
Do not buy a bird that is not fully feathered. Fully
feathered and a month old is O.K. They will still need to be hand fed till
they are eight weeks old.
They eat a couple of teaspoons of baby apple sauce or
puree banana or papaya every three hours. They open their cute yellow beaks
in huge sqwarking v shapes whenever they see you. At age six weeks through
to eight weeks they are weaned gradually on to the green variety of mynah
bird pellets, or soaked dog biscuits and heaps of chopped fruit and
vegetables.
Appearance
Mynahs have an appealing black coat with yellow markings
on the head called wattles. The bright orange beak fades to yellow at the
tip, and the legs and feet are yellow too. Immature Hill mynahs look like
the adults though the plumage is not glossy. The wattles are very pale - not
yet developed.
What are Wattles?
Some types of mynahs, including the Greater Indian and
Java Hill Mynahs, have wattles. Wattles are the yellow bare skin pattern
under the eye and at the sides of the face meeting in the back. As a Hill
mynah gets older, the wattle skin becomes a brighter yellow. As mynahs reach
sexual maturity, the wattles may start to swell. This is normal.
Hill mynahs hop when they move around on the ground,
instead of the jaunty walks that other starlings and mynahs have. They can,
however, fly very fast. Just before sunset, they become especially active,
calling and answering to one another until finally retiring to their
sleeping places. Their sounds include shrill whistling, gurgling and
screeching noises.
Drinking
Mynahs drink by dipping their bill into the water to
scoop it up. Then they raise their head, tipping it up to let the water run
down into their gullet. Because of this method an ample amount of water is
needed for the bird to be able to fill his bill.
Bathing
Mynahs love their baths and will splash around in the
water, dunking their heads, getting themselves soaked to the skin. They like
to do this at least twice a day. There is no need to dry them afterward for
they do this themselves by shaking off the water and running their beak
through their feathers. It is normal for them to shake their little heads to
dry it after a bath to get the water off and out of the ears. They will also
sneeze after a bath to clear water from their nostrils. Most mynahs will
take a bath after being placed back in the cage after free time out,
especially after being handled. Clean little birds!
Down The Iron Road:
Enter The Internal Combustion Engine
by John D.
Blyth
Few of the books about the railways of Siam and Thailand
mention the very first no-steam powered vehicle to appear on the rails in the
Kingdom. This appeared as early as 1908 and was petrol (gasoline) propelled -
although the compression-ignition diesel-powered unit was by then known in
principle, it was still in its infancy and far from reliable. The Pak Nam
Railways, running since 1893 between a point in Bangkok, very near the front of
the present Hua Lumphong station, down to the river mouth, was the proud owner,
then, of a ‘railcar’, built by the British firm of Thorneycroft; able to be
driven from either end, it had a 40 hp motor driving, through a two speed gear
box; as built- plainly for the lower orders as passengers, although the write-up
makes it clear that better seating and a proper form of protection could be
provided. The only picture seen was a very poor reproduction from a photograph,
and it gives little away; history does no better, and the vehicle’s fate is
unknown.
 The
Hulk: all that remains of the once revered No. 601; recalling that this picture
was taken in 1994, things will not have improved-indeed the Frichs makers’
plates of cast brass have been removed by brute force since then.
Twenty years later the Royal State Railway (RSR) became
involved; it is alleged that even in the ’20s they were concerned at the
effect of wood-burning locomotives on the depletion of the nation’s forests
(yet wood remained the main fuel for steam locomotives until their general
replacement about 1975!), and in 1928 two small ‘main line’ diesel
locomotives were supplied by the Schweitzerischer Lokomotiv-und Maschinenfabrik
of Winthertur, Switzerland. These little engines with four wheels only, and
numbered 21 and 22, had a 200 hp diesel unit which drove on to a ‘jackshaft’
(a stub axle with no wheels), through a five-speed mechanical gearbox, of which
the gears themselves were in constant mesh, the speeds being selected through
the engagement of dog-clutches. Many ordinary gear-boxes at this time were still
worthy of the comment by the Frenchmen who invented the gear box: ‘C’est
brusque et brutal, mais ca marche’ - and indeed they continued to be rough and
brutal for many years, and did not always work too well.
40 km/hour maximum speed, and a limited load to be hauled
even on easy sections plainly did not suffice, but, downgraded to shunting work
in Bangkok yards, they could be and did fulfil a useful role, and did so for a
long time, being retired in 1964. No.21 has been preserved in a fine condition
and can be seen outside the main door of the H.Q, of the State Railways, a few
minute walk from the main Hua Lumphong station.
 The
pioneer diesel locomotive in Thailand: No 21, preserved outside the State
Railway Headquarters in 1994.
Then the RSR turned to Denmark and the firm of Frichs in
ลarhus, considered to be the most advanced builders of larger diesel
locomotives with an electric transmission. It is significant that this is, in
various forms, the commonest type of transmission, world-wide, on diesel
locomotives except the very smallest, possibly due to its being adopted early in
the change to diesels in the USA. The RSR ordered from Frichs some 1000 hp
locomotives, with four carrying wheels at each end and two groups of drive
wheels in the centre. So now we have to look at a means of noting the wheel
arrangements of non-steam locomotives, and most railways have adopted something
like the German standard which uses letters for driven axles and numbers for
non-driven ones. Note AXLES, half the number compared with the British system
which counted WHEELS! So these locomotives were to be described as 2 ‘Do 2’;
the apostrophe shows axles on a bogie which can swing from side to side on
curves, and the small ‘o’ shows a group of axles whose wheels are not
coupled by side-rods or gearing. These locomotives were very successful, and it
was one of them that made world headlines by working through from Bangkok to
Singapore on the then through train between these points in 1932.
But Frichs firm also completed in 1932 what was on of the
most notable locomotives of its time. In effect two of the 1000 hp locomotives
rolled into one! This was rated at 1600 hp, with some down-rating of the
traction motors, but it was then the most powerful narrow-gauge locomotive in
Asia. It may be a sobering thought for proud Brits that they had to wait another
seventeen years before they could see a diesel locomotive of equivalent power
running on their lines... this was the famous LMS No. 1000 which went into
service on the eve of the 1948 nationalisation, and so was one of the very last
‘privately built’ locomotives in the U.K. With its partner, completed about
a month later, it was tested against one of the Stanier ‘Duchess’ Class
4-6-2s, with rather inconclusive results.
As for the big locomotive, for the Siamese RSR, it was
perfectly satisfactory. A little more powerful than was actually needed for the
passenger trains of the day, it spent much of its working days working freight
trains on the difficult gradients approaching Chiang Mai in the far north, and
also on the approach to Korat, where the line is equally difficult for steam
traction, and on both it was a real godsend. No.601, as it was, remained in
service until, during an Allied bombing, during the war, one of the bogies was
damaged. It appears that it could not be repaired until peace came once more,
and in due course this was done and No. 601 returned to serve the rails once
more.
I have a little more technical data for any who may be
interested: contact me at P.O. Box 97 in Pattaya City.
No.601 was never repeated although more such powerful
locomotives might well have been of great value in the declining days of steam.
It remained in service until 1964, when it is stated to have been
‘preserved’ at Bang Sue. Mr Ramaer’s picture of it, in his book ‘The
Railways of Thailand’ does not suggest any truth in this, rather it that it
was dumped in the open at the end of a siding in the depot there, and has not
been touched ever since; my own picture, reproduced, does not detract from this
thought; it has been rotting away for over 30 years in an unkind climate, rail
staff wash their overall and hang them to dry on the engine, and if this cannot
be reversed as a policy I would rather see this historic locomotive quietly
broken up than remain as a hulk. Considering the number of steam locomotives
that have been kept, in most cases in admirable condition, at various stations
on the system, it is a pity that better cannot be done for one of the real
advances for which the former RSR was responsible.
Coins of the Realm:
Rare 1/4 and 1/2 Baht coins sold for USD 190,000
by Jan Olav Aamlid
President House of the Golden Coin
http://www.thaicoins.com
It is not often you will see 25 Satang (1/4 Baht) and 50
Satang (1/2 Baht) coins in circulation. The place I get mine in Pattaya is as
change in Foodland or at some of the department stores. As a coin-dealer and
collector, I always look at my change, but I rarely find something of interest
for my collection, so the small change normally goes in the Rotary donation-box!
I received an e-mail from a young collector a few days ago.
He wanted to start a coin-collection, but as a schoolboy his finances were very
limited. I replied by suggesting he start with a date collection commencing in
2530 (1987) up till today. The 25-Satang, 50-Satang, 1-Baht, 5-Baht and 10-Baht
can be found in normal circulation, and the complete collection would cost him
234 Baht and 50 Satang.
Even after the collection is complete, one can keep on
looking for better grades (conditions) in normal change and end up having a
complete collection in good grade. But remember not to clean your coins. They
are worth more if they are not cleaned. For a foreigner, a collection such as
this is educational too. The numbers are in Thai and before the collection is
complete I am sure one will know how to read and write all the Thai numerals.
 Coin
box with the 1-Baht RS 127 (1908). The box was distributed at the cremation of
King Chulalonkorn (Rama V)
However, that small change can be worth a lot of money. In
the 1993 Spink-Taisei Auction in Singapore sold a set of Essais or Patterns. It
was a 1/4 Baht from RS128 (1909), 1/2 Baht from RS129 (1910) and a 1-Baht from
RS127 (1908) made at the Paris Mint. The coins never got into normal circulation
because King Chulalongkorn (1868-1910) passed away and the 1-Baht coin were only
distributed at his cremation. The set sold was in very nice condition, and the
hammer dropped at US$ 190,000. Something to think about, next time you look at
your small change!
I can not promise that your collection of circulating Thai
coins will increase as much in value as this set has done over time, but I am
sure that in some years it can be sold for far more than its face value.
Nightmarch
The cold weather of last Christmas, the chilliest for 20
years we were reliably informed by the weather people, saw many of the young and
not so young ladies who work in the outdoor boozers rugged up like Eskimos in a
blizzard. Most girls tend to dress in quite alluring fashion, but during the
cold weather they looked as though they’d come out of the pages of Fishwife
Monthly or Happy Tractoring instead of Vogue!
I for one was glad the weather went back to normal, but I
couldn’t help wondering about all those girls who, finding the
wallet...sorry...man of their dreams, obtain visas and then trek off to climates
that, by and large, are far colder than Thailand. Then again, pretty much
anywhere on the planet is going to be colder than Thailand considering our
proximity to the Equator.
Many of the ladies I’ve spoken to who return from countries
like Germany and England can’t believe the weather can get so cold. Some,
however, enjoy the change from constant heat. In the final analysis, it all
comes down to personal preference.
Seen Around Town: Soi 6 (Yodsak) is famous- or infamous,
depending upon your point of view- for its goodtime bars, particularly among the
ex-pat community and regular visitors to Pattaya. If there was one place that
encapsulated the ‘nature’ of Soi Yodsak it surely had to be the aptly-named
Gobble N Go Bar. It didn’t last long under that cognomen and now goes by the
less enticing Pan Nice Lady Bar.
For the Hungry: It’s already starting to get very popular
but the hole-in-the-wall noshery across the road from the Diana Dragon
apartments (Soi Diana) has to be considered among the best value in town with
nothing priced at more than 70 Baht. I had a tasty chicken schnitzel with fried
potatoes and salad as well as a cup of tea for a total bill of 85 Baht and the
food was better than a posh noshery where I’d munched the night previous and
had my wallet lightened to the tune of 350 Baht.
Definition: For quite some months now it has become
impossible to walk along the beachfront during the daylight hours without being
accosted by people asking you to participate in a survey or three. ‘Thomas
Keating’ (he of the Bar Hopping Guide) has suggested a collective noun for
this group of canvassers: a ‘rash’.
Out of the Rumour Mill: According to sources not even
remotely close to the decision makers, the buildings along the bayside section
of Walking Street will be replaced by a posse of bulldozers and earthmovers
within the next six months. Ho Hum. We’ve been hearing this rumour for years
and years and one day, I suppose, it will eventually happen and all the
rumourmongers will say, “I told you so”.
Seen Around Town: Traffic along both the Beach and Second
Road’s has been getting thicker and thicker with each passing year, especially
with the arrival of multitudes of gargantuan tour buses. Traffic jams are a
common occurrence on Friday and Saturday night’s but on May 19, at the height
of the 2000 Cobra Gold exercises, I was witness to a new way of slowing the
traffic down. A squad of Thai soldiers, dressed in T-shirts, combat fatigues and
boots, were running in formation, four abreast and about twenty deep, along
Beach Road at around five o’clock in the afternoon. Any later and instead of
them holding up the traffic, it would have been the traffic holding them up!
For the Thirsty: One of the best-run franchises in town may
well be Swensen’s at Royal Garden Plaza (Beach Road end). The 47 Baht
chocolate milkshakes are a favourite with me, and the management and staff bends
over backwards to please. One night I ordered a chocolate milkshake and after
consuming it the female Thai manager came over and told me I hadn’t been given
the correct blend of chocolate. Despite the fact that I hadn’t noticed and
I’d consumed the shake, she insisted that I be given a milkshake with the
correct blend. There are a lot of places in town whose service is less than
ideal, but Swensen’s certainly isn’t one of them.
Suggestion: Both Soi 8 and particularly Soi 7 are becoming
increasingly dangerous for pedestrians. With the proliferation of good-time
joints along both sois it is not uncommon to witness the occasional collision
between inebriated, and some not-so-inebriated revellers and a vehicle, be it
two or four wheeled. Although it would be impractical (because of the number of
hotels) to turn the sois into a mini-version of Walking Street, surely the
strategic placement of a number of speed bumps would mean that vehicles would be
forced to slow down and thus the risk of serious accidents be reduced. I hope it
does not take a fatality or a serious injury to a tourist before the authorities
take some action.
Sign of the Times: The former French resturant Etape,
situated on the corner of Second Road and Soi 6 (Yodsak), has given way to a
goodtime bar named Nano. If the classy-looking sign on Second Road is anything
to go by then the place might be worth a look.
In the Hot Spots: At the Paradise Club (Soi 8) a number of
large beer coasters were stacked on the bar. They hailed from England and were
promoting Hamlet cigars. The front of the coasters read, “Do You Believe
Everything You Read? ‘Hamlet True Stories’ Happiness is a cigar called
Hamlet”. On the back were some alleged true stories.
I thought the funniest was, “An American man on holiday in
Paris hired a personal tour guide to help him look around. The guide first took
his client to the cathedral in Montmartre where the tourist asked him how long
the cathedral took to build, to which the reply was: ‘About ten years’. The
American retorted: ‘Gee, in America, we would have had this up in ten
months!’ The next attractions were the Arc de Triomphe, Notre-Dame and the
Louvre, and at each place the American asked the same question and the same
boast of how quickly it would have been built in America. When they arrived at
the Eiffel Tower, the American asked the guide: ‘Wow. What is that?’ and the
exasperated guide replied flatly, ‘I have no idea, it certainly wasn’t there
yesterday.’”
My e-mail address is: [email protected]
Copyright 2000 Pattaya Mail Publishing Co.Ltd.
370/7-8 Pattaya Second Road, Pattaya City, Chonburi 20260, Thailand
Tel.66-38 411 240-1, 413 240-1, Fax:66-38 427 596; e-mail: [email protected]
Updated by Chinnaporn Sangwanlek, assisted by
Boonsiri Suansuk. |
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