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HEADLINES [click on headline to view story]:
 
Family Money: The Value of Money - Part 2

Successfully Yours: Chart Jantarasittipol
  
Snap Shots: Colour my world!
 
Modern Medicine: Thrush. A bird in the hand?

Heart to Heart with Hillary
 
Grapevine

Dining Out: Possibly the best value in town!
 
Animal Crackers: Readers Tail “Cat Cake”
 
Auto Mania: A Sunday Funday Afternoon’s Drive

Fitness Tips: Sex!

Family Money: The Value of Money - Part 2

By Leslie Wright

How exactly does one define money?

Most people think of money as the cash in their pockets and what they have in the bank.

It should come as no surprise to most readers that economists, bankers and financiers define it somewhat differently from the average man in the street. And even these learned worthies disagree on what items can be defined as money.

So what items should be counted as money in a modern economy?

It is clear that one component of money is currency. But the definition of money must include more than just currency because the great bulk of payments - both domestic and international - are made by transferring bank deposits and not by currency. Currency is merely the small change in the monetary system.

Bank checking accounts must obviously also be included in the definition of money. Beyond this basic definition, however, there is disagreement. Some economists prefer to define money by its essence - the fact that it is a medium of exchange and is liquid. According to this criterion, money is narrowly defined as currency plus checkable deposits.

Other economists, however, notably Milton Friedman and Anna Schwartz, prefer a broader approach.

Economists and policy makers are primarily interested in the supply of money because changes in the supply of money bring about changes in prices and output, and hence in income.

They therefore define money as that total which gives the best explanation and prediction of changes in income, rather than by money’s inherent characteristics.

In addition, they believe that the total should be subject to control because policy makers not only want to predict income but to change it if necessary.

This approach to the definition of money and the previously discussed approach are not in fundamental conflict; essentially, it is a disagreement about whether to use the word money for one thing or the other.

Defining terms

The Value of Money - Part 2

On a more practical level, what specific items should be included in money?

Until recently, the US Federal Reserve System used the following rule. So-called narrow money, or M-1, was defined to include currency and checking deposits, and broad money, M-2, was defined as M-1 plus time and savings deposits in banks. M-3 included, in addition, deposits held in savings and loan associations and savings banks.

This set of definitions had to be changed in 1980, when all savings and loan associations and mutual savings banks in the U.S. were allowed to offer checkable deposits to their customers in the form of NOW (Negotiable Order of Withdrawal) accounts, which are interest-bearing demand deposits. (U.S. commercial banks may also offer NOW accounts.)

First, there is M-1A, which is essentially the old M-1. (U.S. Federal government deposits are excluded from both the old and the new measures.) This measure of money will probably be phased out.

A more important one is M-1B, which adds in checkable deposits in savings and loan associations and savings banks and credit unions.

Then there is M-2, which adds to M-1B savings and time deposits below $100,000, shares in money-market mutual funds, and some other very liquid items.

M-3 then adds to M-2 all savings and time deposits of more than $100,000 plus a few minor items.

Mmm. Once economists & bureaucrats start their jiggery-pokery, defining and discussing money tends to become a bit more complicated than most people like to think about. But to gauge the real state of a country’s economy, such definitions are necessary.

Just as you have to keep the housekeeping budget separate from the holiday budget from the school fees budget from the ‘fun’ budget - even if your money is all lumped together in one bank account which you call ‘cash’ - so a country has to gauge the state of its monetary affairs and where the money is flowing from and to.

Measuring money

Apart from the question of how to define money, there are problems in measuring it correctly.

A serious problem is created by errors in seasonal adjustments. Seasonal adjustment means that the data are made more comparable by eliminating changes due to seasonal factors.

For example, in Western economies, currency outstanding normally rises in December because of Christmas shopping. (And in Thailand too, where the High Season brings throngs of tourists with their pockets full of liquidity.)

Unfortunately, such seasonal adjustments lead to large errors, and frequently a wide discrepancy exists between the money stock figures as first published and the final revised estimates. The weekly estimates of the money stock are particularly unreliable.

The supply of money

U.S. currency is issued by the Federal Reserve (paper money) and by the U.S. Treasury (coins), but they do this in a passive way. They provide banks with as much currency as banks want, debiting the banks’ account with the Federal Reserve in exchange.

A restrictive monetary policy is never carried out by restricting the quantity of currency, because banks must always be provided with enough currency.

Instead, the Federal Reserve controls the volume of bank deposits in the Banking System. This is done by Federal Reserve purchases and sales of securities, which alter bank reserves.

Because banks keep reserves against their deposits, increases in reserves allow banks to increase loans, causing the money supply to increase.

The Origins of Money

Many disputes exist about the origin of money and its role in primitive society.

One school of thought argues that in primitive societies money was used not for everyday trade but only for certain ceremonial and public transfers, such as tribute, bride price, and blood money.

Particular moneys could be used only for particular purposes, or for payments to certain social classes, such as gold and silver for aristocrats and copper for common people.

As economies developed, money was used more and more for ordinary trade and tended to consist of metals, although cowrie shells were used for a long time in Africa.

Coinage was probably invented in ancient China and reinvented by the Lydians in what is now Turkey. In fact, Croesus, the last king of Lydia and famous for his great wealth gained by trade, instituted the first official government coinage in the mid-6th century BC before his kingdom was conquered by Cyrus the Great of Persia, who then adopted and developed Croesus’ coinage system with the latter’s help.

Paper currency was also invented in China, perhaps as early as the 3rd century BC.

Ancient Babylon had a highly developed monetary system with banks and credit, as did ancient Greece and Rome.

For reasons not well understood, in early medieval Europe the money economy went into a decline and barter re-emerged. During the 9th century, however, the European economy started to become monetized again.

It is tempting to sketch monetary history as an evolution from a system of concrete objects - such as ounces (or pounds) of precious metals - to more and more abstract units, such as checking deposits.

But this evolutionary explanation is an oversimplification.

For example, the stone money used on the Pacific island of Yap was more abstract than modern money because the large stones that served as money could still be used as such even if they had been lost at sea

Gold

One of the principal uses of gold today is as a currency reserve.

For centuries gold was used directly as currency along with silver.

During the 19th century it assumed a role as the sole basis of the currencies of most nations whereby the value of a currency was defined in terms of a fixed quantity of gold. The gold standard was an international monetary system in which paper money was directly convertible into gold.

The heyday of the gold standard was between 1870 and the outbreak of World War I in 1914, when the British pound dominated international trade and prices remained fairly stable.

World War I disrupted this system. At the end of the war, the United States was the only Western country where paper money was still convertible into gold coins.

European countries returned slowly to a modified gold standard, but by the mid-1930s, few central banks were required to hold stocks of gold in order to meet liabilities.

Because increases in the money supply were tied to the amount of gold held in national coffers, the gold standard enforced an inflexibility in exchange rates, which had little reference to economic conditions.

The original gold standard was gradually abandoned (the United States stopped minting gold coinage in 1934), and by the late 1950s the dollar had emerged as the principal unit of international monetary transactions.

While most countries continued to use gold as a reserve asset, its importance lessened until, by the 1970s, it was only one of several means of payment, which, in addition to dollars, also included such monetary mechanisms as the Special Drawing Rights, or "paper gold," issued by the International Monetary Fund.

Since that time, gold has been bought and sold on the market, with widely fluctuating prices, and gold reserves nowadays maintain only a very indirect relationship with the values of international currencies.

The value of any particular currency nowadays depends more on internationally perceived acceptability than on any ‘real’ intrinsic value based on reserves, let alone bars of bullion.

If you have any comments or queries on this article, or about other topics concerning investment matters, write to Leslie Wright, c/o Family Money, Pattaya Mail, or fax him directly on (038) 232522 or e-mail him at [email protected]. Further details and back articles can be accessed on his firm’s website on www.westminsterthailand.com.

Leslie Wright is Managing Director of Westminster Portfolio Services (Thailand) Ltd., a firm of independent financial advisors providing advice to expatriate residents of the Eastern Seaboard on personal financial planning and international investments.

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Successfully Yours: Kristsana Borisuth

by Mirin MacCarthy

The TV show ER is internationally renowned. However, being the chief nurse of a hospital emergency room is not glamorous, but a hard, responsible, demanding job that requires a special type of person. The chief nurse at the ER at Bangkok Pattaya Hospital, Khun Kristsana Borisuth is a special person who loves her work and sails through it and life with a confident friendly ease.

suc.jpg (19865 bytes)Being the ER Charge Nurse is not just administration. It also covers supervision of twenty nurses, controlling the ambulance service porters, and drivers (which receive about 170 calls a month), the Home Help Care and the Hotel Call services. It also means working shift work and spending 50% of the time doing practical work with the staff.

Kristsana moved to Pattaya from Phuket in 1993 after the death of her first husband. "I chose the Bangkok Pattaya Hospital because it was newly opened with the opportunity for promotion and working with new staff, and the mother hospital in Bangkok had a good reputation."

Kristsana spent the first six months here as a staff nurse, then the next two years as a nurse supervisor. For the last four years she has been head of ER.

She advises anyone who wants to take up nursing as a career to... "be really sure they want to be a nurse before they start. Thais believe that it is a glamorous job, but when they find out really how stressful it is they quit early. This is just a waste of money, time and self esteem."

So why did Kristsana take up the calling? "When I was young my mother sold food in a Bangkok hospital. I used to observe the nurses and doctors and saw what they did and wanted to be like them. Thais consider that if you can help relieve people of pain and suffering or even save a life, you make merit and maybe a better place in paradise."

Kristsana excelled at science and biology at school and chose to study nursing at the Khon Kaen University in the North East as a way of leaving home. Although her family life was a happy one she says it is Thai style for the girls to stay at home with the family, and she wanted to have a little independence.

She graduated with a BA in Nursing Science in 1976, then spent the next two years working as an industrial nurse in a large factory and the next couple of years as a teacher in nursing college.

In Thailand, to become a Registered Nurse you must graduate with at least a Master’s Degree. Kristsana did this the hard way, studying for her Masters Degree in Forensic Science at Mahidol University during the day and working in an Intensive Care Unit on night shift. Undeterred by hard work, she quickly followed this up with a First Class Certificate in Midwifery.

When Kristsana is not working, she loves to read, study comparative religion and philosophy and enjoys Thai cooking. She has traveled all over Asia and Canada, the U.S. and Germany both on holidays and as a patient escort. The country she prefers besides Thailand is Laos. "It reminds me of when I was young. How Thailand was years ago. I prefer a peaceful life."

She remains most enthusiastic about her job. "I appreciate the chance to work here. The board of committee is good and we can share in ideas. I love the staff, they are very active and responsible."

Her values have changed over the years. "When I was young I wanted money and position. Now family and good health come first." For her, success means; "Having your boss recognise your ability and the staff giving you respect and coming to you with any problems."

Retirement plans are a few years away yet. "When I retire I want to spend time with my husband (in 1995 she re-married to a retired Canadian surveyor) travelling between Thailand and Canada."

You get the feeling that no-matter what might turn up in the future, Kristsana will be ready for any emergency.

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Snap Shots: Colour my world!

by Harry Flashman

It is not so long ago that all photography was in Black and White. To get different colours, toners were added to the final bath water for the prints - selenium, sepia, iodine - they all gave a different "cast", but it was still B&W.

However, we invented colour film. We learned how to make it so cheaply that everyone could afford to use it. We made it so responsive that any simple camera could handle it. We made it universally popular.

This is no object of wonder. We live in a colourful world - and especially so in tropical Thailand. However, just how "true" are the colours you get back from your friendly photo processors?snap.jpg (19444 bytes)

The correct answer is "not very" and this will change from brand to brand and film speed (ISO rating) to film speed. As an exercise, take the same subject with the same camera at the same time of day with different films and then compare the end results. Reds will vary from orange to purple and blues and greens will also show spectacular differences.

You will also get spectacular differences in colour depending upon the time of day. The "colour" of the sun’s rays is measured in a scale called Kelvin degrees and this differs dependent upon the time of day. The blue end of the range is in the morning and the "red" end in the afternoon. When the sunlight is the source of illumination for your photograph, the colour "temperature" (the degrees Kelvin thing) of the sun’s rays will give the overall cast to the picture. This is why you get "warm" (orange-red) tones in the late afternoon and "cold" (bluish) tones in the mornings.

Of course, if you use other sources of illumination for your photographs, you will get even more different colour casts. Look at any photographs you have taken where fluorescent lamps were the principal light source. The picture will have a distinctly "green" hue. Similarly, if "ordinary" light bulbs are the light source (these are called tungsten bulbs) you will get a very strong orange cast to the photograph.

If you really want to get rid of the tungsten orange, then you have to use a blue filter on the lens to counteract the colour shift. You are actually "balancing" the light temperature by using the "cold" filter to neutralise the "warm" light source.

Now while this all sounds terribly technical, it is not really. All it means that by understanding the different colour temperatures, you can start to take charge of the end results of your photographs.

Pro shooters will use this to impart a mood to their shots. When taking a restaurant, for example, you want to evoke a warm, friendly mood. So, turn off all the fluoro’s and the on-camera flash and turn up all the tungsten lights. End result is that warm inviting glow.

Now, if on the other hand you want the bleak wintery feel to a photo, get up early in the morning and take the shot of someone standing alone on a windswept beach. The blue cast from the early morning sun will do that for you. If you are not an early riser, then bung a blue filter on the lens and get the same effect - that cold blue cast through the picture.

Likewise, you can purchase various degrees of warming filters, that can be used to give a slight orange cast to your shots. These are called 81A, B and C. Harry Flashman always keeps an 81A on the front of all his lenses, just because the slightly warm colour is beneficial in producing flattering skin tones, especially with "Farang" women.

The colourful world is yours to produce. Try it this weekend.

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Modern Medicine: Thrush. A bird in the hand?

by Dr Iain Corness

Why would we call a fungal infection "Thrush"? What the poor relative of the sparrow has to do with the yeast-like fungus Candida albicans I have no earthly idea, but you do not need 6 years at medical school to diagnose it as most mothers can recognise the condition very quickly.

A few years ago, Candidiasis was a very fashionable disease, and all sorts of symptoms were attributed to the fungus. Wonderful "elimination" diets were prescribed along with other hocus-pocus. Tests were done to show the presence of the organism, thereby demonstrating the "truth" of the infection.

What was forgotten in all this was the simple fact that Candida albicans is what we call a "commensal". These are organisms that can live with us, rather than feed on us! In other words, consider them to be "friendly" little fellows. We all carry them around, but their presence does not necessarily mean an "infection".

The commensals all live on us in a delicate balance. None get the upper hand until some other event occurs, and that event can be as simple as the taking of some broad spectrum antibiotics. Knock out some other "friendly" bacteria along with the nasty bugs and you can now get an overgrowth with Candida. You now have clinical "Thrush".

The Candida organism can bob up anywhere on the body, but generally it prefers the warm moist areas. The groin is a favourite region and the condition there is often referred to as "Jock Itch" or "Crotch Rot". However, it can occur in any skin fold, so women can get this under the breasts and obese folk in the abdominal fatty "apron".

Babies can get this in their "nappy rash" region - another warm and moist area almost 24 hours a day!

Other regions that can remain moist are around the fingernails, especially in certain occupations (brewery workers for example, where it is called "Beer Rot") and at the angle of the mouth, called Cheilosis.

Oral Thrush is also very common, and lactating mothers can get this around the nipples.

Candida settles fairly quickly with the correct treatment, generally local application of econazole derivatives, though sometimes it is necessary to take it by mouth as well. The problem occurs with the definitive diagnosis. It is necessary to ensure the condition that appears on the skin is not Tinea, Psoriasis, Erythrasma, Eczema, Contact Dermatitis or Seborrhoea.

Two traps for the unwary - recurrent Thrush may be a symptom of some disease states, including HIV and secondly, it will appear to settle with hydrocortisone creams - but it has not, and will spring up even worse later on.

Even though you can identify Thrush by eye most of the time, the final diagnosis depends upon skin scrapings, not just a skin swab and it is vitally important to correctly identify any predisposing conditions as well. So while Thrush may be prevalent, make sure it is not masking a major problem.

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Dear Hillary,
My husband who works for a large multinational was transferred here 6 months ago, and the time has been sheer bliss till recently. We went to restaurants and did everything together. However, of late he has been going to Bangkok for business and having meetings running till late in the evening. We have been married for 40 years and he has been a good husband and father for our 9 children. I was prepared to accept these meetings till last week when the maid showed me lipstick on his collar. I do understand there are some beautiful women in Pattaya and I am 58 years old and have had 9 children. Do I confront him and fear the worst or just let it go?

Terrified

Dear Terri,

I am sorry. That is a decision that you alone can make and will have to live with. In way of reassurance, one swallow does not make a summer. You are still in residence as lady of the manor so maybe it is a matter of waiting it out. Now you are aware of the situation though, complacency should be a thing of the past. Start doing some positive things for yourself. Take up new interests - socialising, studying or reading. A practical start would be to buy a copy of the book, "What to Know About Your Husband’s Money Before the Divorce." Finally, confronting someone is usually not a good scene. It may be more productive to state mildly that you prefer you both spend more time together and that the maid was unable to get the lipstick off his shirt. Certainly insist on accompanying him on any business trips to Bangkok. Good luck.

Dear Hillary,

I have a very embarrassing problem. For many years I have suffered from nocturnal wind. I have a new girlfriend and the relationship has become very serious. I keep putting off asking her to stay overnight because I am afraid she will be put off by my musical botty. What should I do?

Windy

Dear Windy,

Try to cure yourself fast. Meanwhile, take up day time romancing. It may help to avoid gas producing foods, including beans, broccoli, cabbage, Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, eggplant, radishes and onions. Do not put more air and gas into your system, either, by avoiding carbonated drinks, chewing gum and smoking. Many people are unaware that lactose intolerance is a major cause of chronic excessive gas. It is worthwhile avoiding all dairy products for ten days including milk cheese and butter to see if this stops the problem.

Dear Hillary,

We have been here for 6 years and with our expat package are very well off. My problem is that I find I have an ever increasing attraction for our new young maid. She is very beautiful and charming and appears to be interested in me too. We have not spoken about this, but have touched hands as we brushed past each other in the corridors. I know my husband would not approve of this. Should I tell him? Should I tell her? I am confused.

Kate

Dear Kate,

Are you crazy? Definitely do not tell either of them. If you have been here for six years you should know that touching between the sexes is acceptable in Thailand and not a sign of sexual attraction. If, however, you think she may definitely be interested ask her to give you a massage and see what develops.

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GRAPEVINE

All hot air
City hall police have arrested a man selling inflated cigar shaped balloons on Jomtien Beach. They said that the inflated toys looked suspiciously like the male organ. Farang sun worshippers pointed out the balloons did resemble miniature "Hindenburg" type airships, except that the two observation carriages had been moved to the rear.

Newspaper scam
Several Pattaya news stands are selling popular English Sunday newspapers, not normally available, for 90 baht each. But don’t be surprised if the crossword has already been filled in or the sports pages are missing. The second hand papers are diverted mysteriously from European flights landing at Bangkok airport. A warning sign is if the newspaper is sealed by a small sellotape strip.

Night mistress
A badly bruised farang punter has complained after dating two sauna hospitality girls nicknamed Dominant Donna and Ruthless Ruth. Marco Paralta, a Spanish tourist, had to become a hospital outpatient after receiving several abdomen blows from the duo whilst under restraint from a rubber mask which stiffled his cries. A spokesman for the Naklua bath house offered Marco a free return visit, but advised him next time to be entertained by Submissive Sandy or Gentle Geraldine.

Phone bill nightmare
The procedures for paying your domestic phone bill at the Pattaya Klang telecommunications center really are the pits. Firstly, everyone (can be 40 people at busy times) has to crowd round one undermanned desk to get the bill stamped. The interminable delays at this point are made worse by the fact that the sole assistant is frequently on the phone or distracted by tea brewing. You then proceed to one of several desks actually to hand over your cash. Better think it out again. Or maybe it’s a ruse to get everyone to switch to bank auto payments.

Rush cash
Reader SB says the quickest way to send out cash from Britain is through Thomas Cook. Your UK contact, cash in hand, visits a branch of the travel agent chain which then transfers the sum electronically to the Bangkok Metropolitan Bank which has a presence in Pattaya. You collect the money by showing your passport and your secret ID which is transaction specific. In theory, this takes a couple of hours. In practice, allow at least three days for Pattaya because of bank conversion delays in Bangkok. If your UK friend uses a credit card to send you money, allow for seven days. In Thailand, Cash Still Rules.

Changes ahead
"If we close down hundreds of bars, put the rest under surveillance and enforce tougher punishment against sex related activities, most of our problems will disappear." No, it’s not a new policy by Pattaya’s Finest. But a remark by Nguyen Thi Hue who is anti-social evils chief in the Vietnamese government. Apparently, the bia om or cuddles joints over there have been getting out of hand again.

Barclays again
Still confusion on Barclays Bank policy as regards issuing credit and debit cards to farangs based in Thailand. Some say you’re OK as long as you retain a UK address and keep quiet about how long you spend abroad. But if you can give only a Thai address and/or are regarded as an expat by the tax authorities, you are high risk for having your card not renewed or canceled. Too many cards, it seems, are stolen in the Land of Smiles.

Just a rumor
Far be it from Grapevine to spread gossip - perish the thought - but a reader had an intriguing conversation with his bank teller this week. She advised him to send much more cash to Thailand from Europe before the end of the summer. No, it wasn’t a theory about the baht climbing higher in July and August. She said a national plan was under review to tax all foreign cash receipts as they arrive in Thailand. Ugh!

Thai treat
Excellent Thai food in charming surroundings at Thai House on North Road, near to the City Hall complex. It’s best to go in a group and let a Thai do all the ordering on your behalf. To aid digestion, there’s traditional Thai dancing on the stage and no screaming cross dressers in evidence. A big bonus is ample parking even on busy weekends.

Thought for the day
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

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Dining Out: Possibly the best value in town!

by Miss Terry Diner

We really do become blasé about the eating scene here in Pattaya. We have some of the best restaurants imaginable, but sometimes tend to keep these as some of the world’s best kept secrets. This week’s Dining Out was one of those.

The Royal Garden Resort and Plaza has a Garden Café (sitting above Delaney’s) and till the end of September it has a special buffet menu on offer. It was this that the Team went to try last week.

dining.jpg (15617 bytes)Garden Café at the Royal Garden Resort.

Like all things in the Royal Garden Resort, the setting is excellent. The wooden paneling and high ceiling gives a "sala-like" atmosphere, and the softly performing three piece music trio adds that little touch of class.

Our host for the evening, Khun Chollakrit, took us for a tour of the buffet - and it certainly was a grand tour, right the way down the restaurant and even around the corner at the end. Be warned, this is no small affair. The range of dishes is excellent and there is no-one who could claim to be left out.

The others in the Team began by selecting from the cold cuts table, sampling sushi and salad, oysters and several meats, while I went straight to the Vietnamese end of the business. The selection there included freshly made Vietnamese spring rolls, sugar cane prawn and a vegetarian pancake. The spring rolls were excellent, that subtle taste coming through that differentiates this type from the deep fried Chinese variety. They were so good I backed up for another helping! The different condiments and sauces were all there too, and the young cook indicated which one went with what.

To wash it all down we consulted the extensive wine list, with a range between 52,000 Baht and 800. We chose a Hardy’s Nottage Hill Cabernet Sauvignon/Shiraz. At around 1200 Baht (including VAT), this wine is a bargain in these high tax days. A lovely dry Australian red.

After letting the starters settle and being serenaded by the violinist we attacked the buffet tables again. There were two soups on offer that night, Tom Yum Goong and a tomato. We chose the tomato and it was an excellent choice. Rich and creamy with just a hint of lemon or lime, it was universally popular at our table.

So to the mains. There is a huge selection with pre-cooked items such as deep fried fish, Chicken a la King, rice varieties and baked potatoes. However, they also have a BBQ section. This has choices including prawns, mussels, sausages, kebabs and fish. If that is not enough, they also have a strong stir-fry section with meat, pork, chicken, squid and appropriate vegetables like snow peas and sprouts.

Again our selections went separate ways, with the others into the kebabs and prawns, while I went for the stir-fry with a combination of chicken and pork. The selected items are left with the chef and the plates are brought to your table when they are cooked.

My stir-fry was brilliant, done in a garlic based sauce, while the prawns of my dinner partners appeared like small lobsters, they were so large. They were also judged as perfectly cooked and very good eating!

For those with any space left, there is a choice of desserts, including French pastries, fresh fruits, Thai jellies and blancmange. By this stage I was "im lao" and did not even have room for the offered coffee.

Now while this had been a very extensive and comprehensive dinner, the best was yet to come. This "all you can eat" buffet is only 220 Baht a head. This makes it one of the best value nights you can have in town. The secret is out! Get in here before the end of September or you will miss out. You will not regret your evening here!

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Animal Crackers: Readers Tail: “Cat Cake”

by Mirin MacCarthy

The first year my fiancée and I were together, I decided to have a very special birthday party for him. I invited all of his friends to his favorite pub and ordered a wonderful cake in his favorite flavor. This was all done in secret while he was at work during the day. So, the morning of his birthday, I went to the bakery to pick up the cake. It was beautiful, exactly what I wanted. I brought it home and set it on the kitchen counter while I called friends to confirm our numbers for the pub. Our kitten, Lily, decided to check out what I had brought home, and jumped on the counter to take a lookanimal.jpg (17833 bytes) while I had my back turned. When I turned around to see what she had done, she jumped through the cellophane window on the top of the bakery box and right into the middle of the cake! Of course, it was frosted with buttercream, so she decided to simply sit down in the midst of the mess and lick herself clean. Luckily, the baker was still in and made up another cake before the party, but I tell you, frosting in fur does not make a pretty cat!

Michele Bultman, Bloomington, IN, USA

Ed. Thank you Michele, I bet you had fun cleaning the kitten.

A Persian for You?

Derek and Seda have two beautiful Persian kittens that they want to sell to good, caring homes. They are going to America to study and are saddened to have to leave their babies behind. The kittens are three months old, both female, and have had all their vaccinations to date. One is a white Persian and the other a Chinchilla. They are healthy, animated, bright-eyed fluff balls. Persians have a placid, good tempered and regal nature, full flat faces and long coats that need daily brushing and combing. Modern Persians cannot hunt and are therefore incapable of fending for themselves. Originally these cats were reserved for Royalty and in the 1600’s were sent by Eastern rulers in Persia (present day Iran) as gifts to French Aristocracy. Still associated with satin cushions and luxury they are an expensive breed, mainly because they achieve sexual maturity later and their litters are often very small. Derek and Seda want 8,000 Baht for their white Persian and 6,000 Baht for their Chinchilla coloured girl. Contact them on 02-8893093/4 and 01-6142371.

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Auto Mania: A Sunday Funday Afternoon’s Drive

by Dr. Iain Corness

Fancy a little trip in a 4x4 this weekend? How about starting in KL and dropping in on Malaysia, Thailand, Laos, China, Tibet, Nepal and India? Some sight-seeing around Ayutthaya, Vientiane, Zhongdian, Lhasa, Katmandu and New Delhi is in order too.

Well, it might take just a tad longer than the weekend - at this stage it looks as if it will be 45 days to cover the six countries on the 12,000 km jaunt. This will be the first 4x4 adventure package to attack this route, so if you’ve ever wanted to be a pioneer, this is the trip for you.

Right now it is in the planning stage and the event will be scheduled for some time next year. You can supply your own vehicle, or the organisers can supply one for you. It is obviously not an event for the faint hearted, but designed for those with a sense of adventure who would like to achieve something that will stay with them for the rest of their lives.

auto.jpg (21421 bytes)One of the organisers said to me, "You will need to be fit to do this trip." A quick scan through the brochure also indicated you will need around 20,000 USD as well, so your wallet better be in good nick too!

If you would like to get some details on this adventure contact Capt. Sittichoke of Eastern Marine Services (tel. 038-608 660 or 01-843 0645, fax 038-607 686).

Autotrivia Quiz

Last week I asked about previous local General Motors production. The Thai company involved was called Asoke Motors and in the early to mid ’70s they assembled the Holden cars from the Australian arm of General Motors, called GMH down under. Quite a few of these are still knocking about and there is even an immaculate black Holden HQ Kingswood with two huge aerials on the rear bumper often seen on the streets of Pattaya.

In Oz they even have a class of racing for the HQ’s, a very tightly controlled series that has captured the imagination of the Australian public. Since the HQ’s were once used as taxi’s and the series originated in Tasmania, they are known popularly as the Tasmanian Taxis and will attract up to 100 entries at race meetings, with elimination races having to be held for a couple of days before a major event.

So to this week - first in, best dressed to fax 427 596 or email [email protected] with the correct answer wins the beer. Why did Rolls-Royce change the R-R initials in the insignia from red to black?

GP Tickets & TV

As predicted, the tickets are selling fast for the F1 GP in Malaysia. Many of the grandstands are sold out already, so if you’re hesitating, NOW is the time to make up your mind! There are only 33,000 seats in the grandstands, so it is no small wonder that they are being sold out so fast. There is just over 3 months to go and this first GP in Malaysia is the one to attend. For the rest of your life you will be able to say "I went to the first one at Sepang." Tickets are available through the local agent, the hard working Capt. Sittichoke of Eastern Marine Services (tel. 038-608 660 or 01-843 0645, fax 038-607 686).

The televised GP at Magny Cours in France was a beauty, with some very good action. Let’s hope that the hairpin in Sepang produces as many braking duels as there was in France. There were loud cheers in Delaney’s when Hakkinen and Schumacher had their tussle. The British GP is on this weekend from Silverstone. See you in front of the big screen at Delaney’s on Sunday evening (please reserve a padded seat for me Kim).

Current standings in the World Championship are Hakkinen 40 points, M. Schumacher 32, Irvine 26 and Frentzen 23.

Big Engines

A little Daihatsu Mira pulled up outside the office the other day. There on the tailgate were the words 3.8 litre Turbo. A Mira owner with a sense of humour.

However, we will all have had some experience, I’m sure, with some hybrid "beasts", generally built in someone’s back yard with engine mountings made from scrap angle iron and an electric welder.

I must admit to owning an MGTC to which we fitted an MGA engine, complete with a Derrington X-Flow head with an MGB gearbox on behind. The conversion was done under the building, with the welder plugged into the neighbour’s washing machine socket. Every time we struck an arc, their TV picture would disappear! The car ate so many rear axles we used to carry two spares, complete with hubs, behind the seats.

One of my mates had a Hillman Imp - remember them? Funny little rear engine devices with positive camber front wheels. Harry fitted a Ford 302 c.i. V8 engine in the back seat area of his. Went like a bullet and cornered the same way!

In Oz, one of the favoured conversions is to stick a Chev V8 in a Jaguar XJ6. Quite frankly, I believe this produced a car that was 300% better than the original. The Jaguar engine was well past its "Use By" date by the time the XJ series was released. A great boat anchor.

With race cars, we did even more diabolical things. Try putting a Rotary Mazda into a Ford Escort for example. You can be guaranteed that the steering column will want to go straight through the oil filter or some other trivial item. You can also put even money on the fact that the exhaust pipe will fry your feet. Another interesting fact when you stick a rice burner in an "ordinary" car is that the power brakes won’t work because rotary engines do not "suck" as hard as piston engines and you do not generate enough vacuum to work the power assist. We actually ended up running two vacuum tanks in the cars, just to work the power booster. Anyway, it certainly made for a better, faster, more reliable and cheaper car to run than when we had the old Lotus Twin Cams in them.

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Fitness Tips: Sex!

by Dvid Garred,
Club Manager,
Dusit Resort Sports Club

G’day Pattaya,

As most of you know, the use of such a blatant, eye-catching, and soon to be revealed as misleading tactics in my headline, is out of character for me. But now that I have your attention, I have a few things that I felt important enough to justify that line of tactics.

Is 150 minutes of exercise per week enough for weight loss?

The U.S. Surgeon General’s Report on Physical Activity and Health recommends at least 30 minutes of accumulated physical activity on most days of the week. However, is this amount enough to produce weight loss in overweight adult women? According to a study published in Medicine and Science in Sports and Exercise, the answer is yes.

The purpose of the study was to examine the exercise threshold that is linked to improvements in weight loss in overweight women. One hundred and thirty nine women were recruited and instructed to exercise five days per week, with duration progressing to forty minutes per day. Group (1) one 40 minute session, (2) two 20 minute and (3) 4 four 10 minute sessions per day. A treadmill was installed in all the women’s homes and they were instructed to limit their caloric intake to 1,200 to 1,500Kcal/day. Their body weight and body composition was measured at the start of the programme and again 24 weeks into the programme. The women had to record their exercise sessions in weekly diaries. Based on these diaries the women were divided into two groups: Those with an average accumulated weekly exercise of less than 150 minutes and those who equalled or exceeded 150 minutes.

In analysing the results, women who reported at least 150 minutes of exercise per week showed significantly greater improvements in weight and fat loss than those who had exercised for less time. This could suggest that the accumulation of at least 150 minutes of exercise per week may enhance weight and fat loss in overweight women and thus it may be beneficial to develop strategies to improve our (yes, us, all of us) adherence to this level of exercise. Reason being; if this is what is required for adult women to burn fat then it will work for adult men as it is, relatively, far more easy for adult men to burn fat than ladies. The researchers of this study are following these women to assess the affect of this level of exercise on long-term weight loss.

Think of it, 30 minutes of exercise at a fat burning intensity and a healthy diet is enough to get a significant change. Everyone can afford the time to do that only 5 days per week!

The importance of recovery

Carrying out great training is not just a matter of conducting tough, high quality workouts. Recovery is an important, yet often overlooked aspect of improving physical fitness. Identifying the right balance between hard work and recovery should be an essential part of your training regime. If your training programme has too much recovery you won’t be able to carry out enough quality work to reach your peak. If the schedule has too little recovery muscular trauma will accumulate steadily over time, until performances actually worsen instead of getting better.

The following guidelines may help you find the right balance:

1. If you feel tired or sluggish on a particular day, don’t train - or train very, very lightly. Your body is telling you that what you need is recovery, not hard work. If a quality workout was scheduled for the day, postpone it and carry it out on the following day if you feel better. That is provided that, of course, you do not have a quality workout planned for the day after that. Two quality sessions in a row are usually too much, especially if you have been experiencing above normal fatigue.

2. To increase the number of quality workouts you carry out (i.e., to avoid spending too much time recovering), try to use the 36 hour principle. For example, you can perform a quality workout Tuesday morning, another Wednesday evening and a third intense session on Friday morning. This will allow you to fit three training sessions into a time frame that would only, normally, allow two. You should then take Saturday off and complete a long session on Sunday.

3. To jump start recovery and be kind to your muscle proteins, make sure you replenish yourself with an ample amount of carbohydrate shortly after your training sessions.

4. Ultimately, you are the best judge of how well you are recovering between workouts. If you look forward to each week of training and approach your workouts with high energy and determination, you are recovering well - perhaps too well. It is always better to recover too well than to recover poorly - recovering too well means that you could probably carry out your difficult workouts sooner that you usually do. If you are feeling tired during many of your weekly workouts and your performance times are off a bit, it’s quite likely that you can improve your performance by not working out harder but by increasing the quality and quantity of your recovery.

Butter gets a health boost

Butter, soon, will no longer be known as the unhealthy cousin of margarine, thanks to new technology developed by Australia’s CSIRO. Butter has traditionally contained a high portion of saturated fatty acids, but CSIRO scientists have recently developed a special diet for dairy cows that mixes mono-unsaturated and poly-unsaturated fats in an ideal combination - and then found ways to ensure these desirable fats pass into milk and butter.

Dairy pastures are naturally very high in polyunsaturates, but previously microbes have broken these down in the cow’s first stomach, leaving the harder saturated fats. By feeding cows a special blend of Canola and Soybean meal and then protecting it against microbial attack in the first stomach with a coating of protein, CSIRO scientists have managed to ensure the desirable fats are carried right through into the end product.

The special diet for dairy cows has been commercialised by an Australian firm, Rumentek Ind., so look out for the butter on the supermarket shelves, especially when you are visiting the western world.

For those with a sweet tooth

Sweet tooth cynics will be pleased to learn that so called chocoholics are simply not addicts to their cravings. A new study reported in the journal Nature suggests that the substances found in chocolate, called cannabinoids, previously thought to be addictive, are just as common in milk. The body breaks down the substances before they reach the bloodstream, making them harmless and therefore non-addictive.

This must sound like great news to the chocoholics out there, now know that you are making a conscious decision to buy and eat that chocolate as your reward after a good week’s training. Empowerment instead of being a slave to instinct and impulse like you feared you were.

Carpe’ diem

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Updated by Chinnaporn Sangwanlek.