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Dear Hillary,
I am 29 years old and I feel like my life is over. I am married with two kids (five and three). I have everything one can think of, I should be happy but I am not. I feel like I am trapped, sitting in a cage. This has nothing to do with me living in Thailand or not working anymore, I’ve felt this way before. I am afraid of so many things, hate traveling, and I am frightened of most animals. I am increasingly tired, irritable and apathetic. I am so ashamed of myself and feel like a complete failure. I keep telling myself that I must change, but I just cannot manage. Am I neurotic? Could it be some kind of brain-disease? Do you think I should go and see a doctor?
Miserable.
Dear Miserable,
I think it would be good to consult a doctor, just to make sure you are not suffering from a serious disease. I believe you are not ill or crazy, but I do think you may be suffering from depression. We all feel miserable at times, but since your life became restricted by the ‘cage’ of fear, it’s time to seek some help. Talk to your husband and enlist his support. Go to see a doctor, together with him. An understanding doctor will listen to your problems. Maybe he will suggest short-term medication and refer you to a psychotherapist for counseling.

Dear Hillary,
I am short sighted and very tired of wearing glasses, but without them I am as blind as a chicken. Walking in and out air-conditioned rooms gives me trouble. Outside, in the heat, my face gets wet from sweat and my glasses will slowly but surly slip off my nose. One of my friends suggested I buy contact lenses. She said they are cheaper and very good in Thailand. Would you suggest them?
Blind.
Dear Blind,
Although I am far-sighted, I have no experience with contact lenses myself. My best friend wears them and says she would never change back to glasses. We have very good opticians here in Pattaya. Maybe you should give them a try.
Just remember, there are some things you have to get adjusted to: opticians never prepare you for the delightful experience of dropping a lens down the toilet or in the sink and then saying hello to every drop of water which just might be the missing lens. The minute the optician pries open your eyes, puts them in, turns you around to take a look in the mirror - a miracle happens: You can see!
My friend said she’s never felt so alive, but the euphoria ended when she first tried to get the thing out and realized they were welded in her eyes. After 10 minutes of doing gargoyle impressions in the mirror, one lens launched itself across the bedroom. I am sure you’ll also get to know your bedroom carpet intimately.
Give up? Never! Soon enough you won’t know you’re wearing lenses - until you dive in a swimming pool and realize you aren’t wearing them any longer. The only guarantee about contact lenses is that you’ll lose them. They scuttle down sinks, floorboards and sides of other people’s sofas. Lens-hunting in a restaurant or another public place is an experience - but you get together with people while crawling along with them on the floor.
Persistence does tame those unruly bits of plastic. A soon as you are used to them, I’ll bet you would not change back to glasses for anything in the world.