Winebibber’s Grapevine  

Dear Hillary,
I am a real klutz. I trip over my own shoelaces. I often stick forkfuls of food in my eye. I’m lucky I wear glasses or I’d be blind.

I’ve had nothing but grief since I came to Thailand. My Thai-Chinese friends take me to Dim-Sum lunches. They’re not being nice. They just love to watch the dumplings go shooting around like guided missiles when I try to pick them up with chopsticks. I can never get Som Tam to my mouth. It always falls in my lap.

It’s worse at parties. I knock trays of drinks out of waiter’s hands. I also back into doorknobs. This makes people think I’m kinkily perverted. I just can’t seem to do anything gracefully.

Hillary, what should I dooo! Damn! I just dropped my pen.

Harried

Dear Harried,
Gently, gently. Jai yen-yen (keep cool). The pace of life is slower in Thailand. Many Westerners try to do everything at top speed. To Thai people, they look like rhinos on amphetamines.

Develop a calm attitude. Nobody will criticise you for moving slowly, especially in Pattaya. Just move at the same pace as the economy.

Before doing anything, such as opening a door, count to 432. You’ll soon have a lovely, glassy-eyed look, and fit in perfectly.

Happy Trance!

Dear Hillary,
I have a problem. I like the temperature a few degrees above absolute zero.

Most of the offices in Pattaya are freezing cold. If I walk into an office or shop, I shiver so badly, people think I have Saint Vitus’ Dance. I don’t want to ask people to lower the air-conditioning just for me. Most Thai people say they keep it cold because Farangs like it this way.

This is fallacious. Most of my Farang friends don’t enjoy picking icicles off their hair at the end of a frigid day at the office.

How can we educate people in the proper use of air-conditioning?

Unwilling Inuit

Dear Unwilling,
Thank you for this question. There are two reasons. When Hillary was young, there was very little air-conditioning in Thailand. The buildings were suited to the climate then; no high-rise concrete monsters. Believe it or not, it was cooler, as the architecture was designed for comfort. Now everything must be ‘civilised’; i.e., it must look Western. Never mind that it’s totally wrong for the climate.

After a while, people become addicted. They can also wear silly-looking Western-style clothing in these frozen fortresses. Such is the price of progress.

Here’s how to solve your problem. Buy one of those unbelievably expensive Cashmere shawls to keep warm. Everyone will want one. When they know the price, and see it has no trendy label, they will be jealous and turn down the air-conditioning to prevent you wearing it.

Sometimes, we must solve problems by appealing to the baser part of human nature.

Warmest Regards

  Thai Idiom:

Düü-Ngiab

Stubborn-Silent

‘I’ve heard of strong and silent.’

‘Yes, but stubborn and silent isn’t an idiom.’

‘I know. It just means stubborn and silent.’

They could be right. But as Pattaya Mail forgot to celebrate Siegmund Freud’s birthday, we would like to offer a ‘psychological’ idiom this week.

If someone attempts to make you angry by NOT doing something, this is called stubborn and silent in Thai.

Examples: ‘My child never complains or causes any problems.’ ‘I yell and scream and tell him that by not doing his homework, he’ll fail his exams.’ ‘He doesn’t say anything.’

‘Oh, being düü-ngiab, huh?’

‘Yes. I want to kill him.’

‘Stubborn and silent’ could be used quite effectively in English.

But the English prefer ‘Passive-Aggressive.’

Both tones are falling.

  Family Money

Estate Planning

by Leslie Wright

Unless you are the Duke of Ditchwater or some other landed gentry, estate planning has nothing to do with deciding which fields to plant with what, or how to maintain the herds of deer. Dear me no!

(Although the sort of estate planning I have in mind is also of considerable concern to the Duke of Ditchwater and other landed gentry, who want to avoid their estates being parceled off to pay rapacious amounts of inheritance tax, or forcing them to allow us peasants to wander around their stately homes for a couple of pounds a look.)

Last week we touched on the importance of making a will, to protect your interests and those of your loved ones after you’ve gone. Several readers have asked me to expand upon this theme, as it has evidently caused a few of the local "immortals" to wonder just how immortal they really are.

Estate planning is simply ensuring in advance that your affairs (financial, that is) are in order (and any offspring from the other sort are provided for also, if that is your wish.)

Offshore Assets

Many people are happy to hold assets in an offshore financial centre, comforted by the thought that those assets are outside the reach of creditors, unfriendly governments, exchange control regulations and unnecessary death duties.

But their assets may not be as secure as they imagine. The problem lies with the planning of their estate.

A person who dies, who held assets in any jurisdiction of the world, is considered to hold an estate in that country which will require the appointment of an executor. The executor must obtain a Grant of Letters of Executorship before any assets can be released and before he can, in turn, pass on the assets to the heirs.

When assets are held in many different jurisdictions, this process is often very complicated.

The Procedures

When someone dies, their assets in each country are frozen and no one - not even the spouse or children - will be granted access until the Grant of Letters of Executorship has been obtained in each country where assets are held.

In order to obtain the Grant of Letters of Executorship in the individual’s country of residence, it must first be proven that death has occurred.

Once the Grant of Letters of Executorship has been issued, it can be used to appoint an Agent in each country who will, in turn, apply to the court of that country to obtain a local Grant of Letters of Administration.

This will allow the Agent to instruct the bank or institution holding the assets to hand them over to the Executor in the client’s country of residence, to be administered in accordance with the terms of the will.

The Problems

It is now that the problems start to become evident - and it is usually the grieving family which is left to cope with them.

Delays: Just at the time when cash flow is most important, the family finds that all the available assets are frozen. It can take months, and even years, to finalise an estate, causing at best inconvenience, and at worst, genuine distress.

Cost: Administering an estate is a lengthy and time-consuming process, and the legal costs, agents’ fees and statutory charges can amount to as much as 10% of the value of the estate.

Taxes: As the Will is a public document, the full details of the estate will be known to the authorities in the individual’s country of residence and may become liable to inheritance tax.

As was mentioned last week, in some regimes this can cost as much as 40% of the estate above the nil-rate band.

Additionally, an individual may have been avoiding the payment of income and capital gains taxes on these overseas assets - but the estate may now become liable to substantial sums in back taxes and penalties.

Forced Heirship: As was also touched on last week, some jurisdictions of the world place legal restrictions on the way in which a testator (what lawyers call someone who has made a will and is now deceased) can dispose of his estate.

This can mean that the estate may not be distributed the way the now-deceased testator may have wished, but can also mean that the estate is distributed in such a way that not all of the heirs are properly provided for. And the testator is hardly in a position to argue!

This is common in civil law countries, such as France and Spain, as well as in many Moslem countries and the Philippines.

Exchange control: If the offshore assets are brought to the attention of the authorities, countries with exchange control regulations may require them to be repatriated.

Financial planning: A single member of the family often assumes the burden of controlling the family’s finances - managing investments, properties and business interests on behalf of other members.

After this person’s death, the family may find it difficult to locate all these assets and no-one may wish or be in a position to take on responsibility for their management. Assets may be lost forever, or subject to mismanagement, misappropriation or unwise or speculative investment, leaving the family in a difficult if not destitute position.

The Solutions

There are a number of ways in which an individual can plan for a more efficient, and less costly, distribution of an estate.

Local Wills: It is possible to make a Will in each jurisdiction in which assets are held.

This has the effect of reducing the time taken to administer the estate but, under international law, the assets must be administered in accordance with the laws of the country of residence at death.

Of course, if you are resident in Thailand when you die, you know how simple, efficient and speedy bureaucratic processes are here.

Joint Accounts: Holding assets in joint accounts may avoid the problem of obtaining a Grant of Letters of Executorship on the death of the first account holder. But the problems have only been deferred until the death of the survivor, and not actually solved.

In many cases even joint bank accounts are frozen if one signatory is known to have died. (When you opened that joint account, you were probably asked to sign a form promising to inform the bank if one of the signatories should die. And in the event your joint signatory should pass away, you must of course inform the bank before emptying the account, otherwise you would be breaking the law. If in doubt, ask your bank manager.)

Trusts: Holding assets in a trust can not only provide flexibility during one’s lifetime but can also provide for a simple and swift distribution of assets after death - in full accordance with one’s wishes, and avoiding any restrictions imposed by forced heirship.

As there is no requirement to obtain a Grant of Letters of Executorship with a trust, there are no costly legal bills to pay. The distribution of assets takes place without disclosure to any third party, so estate duty, which would otherwise have been payable, is often avoided.

Many people, however, believe that trusts are expensive to set up, expensive to maintain, and are only for the super-rich.

This is not necessarily the case, however, and next week we’ll look at trusts in more detail.

If you have any comments or queries on this article, or about other topics concerning investment matters, write to Leslie Wright, c/o Family Money, Pattaya Mail, or fax him directly on (038) 232522 or e-mail him at [email protected]. Further details and back articles can be accessed on his firm’s website on www.westminsterthailand.com.

Leslie Wright is Managing Director of Westminster Portfolio Services (Thailand) Ltd., a firm of independent financial advisors providing advice to expatriate residents of the Eastern Seaboard on personal financial planning and international investments.

  Health & Nutrition Facts: Know the facts

by Laura Zubrod

Diabetes is a disorder in the way your body uses a type of sugar, called glucose, for energy. All the foods we eat are eventually broken down into glucose. It’s this sugar that enters our cells and provides them with energy. However, glucose cannot get into the cells without some help from a substance called insulin. Basically, insulin is the key that unlocks the door to your cells to let glucose enter. People with diabetes do not make enough insulin or their bodies cannot use it very well.

There are two types of diabetes. The first type, called Type I or insulin dependent diabetes, occurs most often in children and young adults. These people’s bodies make little or no insulin and they require daily injections of insulin to live. The second kind, Type II or non-insulin dependent diabetes, is by far the most common. These people are often older than 40 years and are frequently overweight. In this type of diabetes, the body does make insulin but it may not be enough or the body cannot utilize it properly.

A form of diabetes, called Gestational diabetes, may occur during pregnancy. It usually disappears when the baby is born, but still needs to be carefully controlled during pregnancy. The risk is higher for women who are overweight, who have had problem pregnancies, or those with a family history of diabetes. Women with gestational diabetes may develop Type II diabetes later in life. Your doctor will determine if you need to be tested for gestational diabetes.

Nutrition plays a very important role in the management of both types of diabetes. The proper amount of carbohydrates, proteins, and fats are determined for each individual by a doctor and dietitian. Meal management can be especially important in Type II diabetes since diet alone can often be used to control blood sugar. Oral medications may also be taken.

If diabetes is not managed properly, serious health problems can arise. High blood sugar over many years can cause damage to your nervous system and blood vessels in your eyes, kidneys, heart, and feet. The good news is that these complications can all be prevented through careful management of the disease.

You are at greater risk for developing Type II diabetes if you have two or more of these risk factors: Over age 40, close family member with diabetes, more than 20% over the weight that is healthy for you, have high blood pressure or high cholesterol, have had gestational diabetes or delivered a baby weighing over 9 pounds, or have had a previous blood sugar problem.

Symptoms of diabetes include frequent urination, especially at night; extreme thirst and hunger; fatigue; feeling ill; dry skin; unexplained weight loss; slow wound healing; visual changes; gum or urinary tract infections; pain, tingling or numbness in extremities; or there may be no symptoms at all. The symptoms of diabetes may begin gradually and can be hard to identify at first. A doctor can diagnose diabetes by checking for symptoms and by testing for glucose in blood or urine.

Fortunately, there are some steps you can take to help decrease your risk of developing Type II diabetes later in life. It is important to achieve and maintain your healthy weight, not only for reducing your risk of developing diabetes, but for other diseases as well. If you are overweight, losing even 10 to 20 pounds can lower your risk. Regular physical activity helps your body transport glucose to your cells. Exercise can also help control weight, lower blood cholesterol levels, control blood pressure, and reduce your risk of heart disease, which is linked to diabetes. High blood pressure should be kept under control with diet and/or medications.

Diabetes is a treatable and many times an avoidable disease. Like many health complications facing older people, the risk of diabetes can be minimized by engaging in regular physical activity, embracing good nutrition, practicing stress management, and getting regular health check-ups.

Readers may write Laura care of the Pattaya Mail with questions or special topics they would like to see addressed.

Copyright 1998 Pattaya Mail Publishing Co.Ltd.
370/7-8 Pattaya Second Road, Pattaya City, Chonburi 20260, Thailand 
Tel.66-38 411 240-1, 413 240-1, Fax:66-38 427 596; e-mail: [email protected]
Created by Andy Gombaez, assisted by Chinnaporn Sangwanlek.