Andy’s caddy gives up on him

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The Backyard Golf Society

It was a case of the tables being turned at Emerald last Friday, Nov. 14.  In the series “The Deadliest Catch” we frequently see greenhorn crew members failing on the first trip out and the captain and crew give up on them.  In this case we saw Andy ‘The Deadliest Catch’ Crabb’s novice caddy say on the 5th hole that “she gave up” on him.  Amidst the laughter from the other playing group Andy explained the young caddy’s stellar performance to that point in the round consisted of 2 pearls of wisdom: 1) that he was white whilst she was brown, something that was apparently repeated several times, and 2) that every shot, even drives on the par 5, seemed to be 150 yards.

With high season upon is we had hoped to see some experienced caddies return to the courses but it seems some youngsters from the local kindergarten have infiltrated the ranks at Emerald.  One can only hope that with another week under her belt this particular caddy realizes that most farangs are white and some shots are not 150 yards.

On to the golf, and the winner of the stableford competition was Irish John.  Near-pin on the par-three 15th went to Mickey ‘the Yak’, who has since departed with Mrs Yak to see the wonders of Angkor Wat.  The skins were well doled out with 7 to Irish John, 5 to Mr Oddie (we all hope she returns so we can use his Golden Trowel moniker again soon), 2 each to Diet Whiskey and Delia from Norwich (he also had a superb chip-in birdie 2 on the near-pin hole), and singles to The Yak and The Quiet Man.

We have lost Second-hand Bob back to Blighty, “The Impregnator” is gone is get married again and as he did not play it was a case of a no-show for “Who Brought Him”.  Mr Oddie has told us that he will be calling the mustachioed one this week to sort out our supposed discount for playing the course 52 weeks a year.