Why don’t you put all your writings into a book?

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Dear Hillary,

Why don’t you put all your writings into a book?  I reckon it would have to be a great hit.  I have mates overseas who read you every week, just for the laugh at the idiots who write in.  I’ll buy the first copy.

Regular Reader

Dear Reg the Reader,

It is always nice to know that the readers enjoy the column, especially people who send champagne and chocolates with their letters.  We have discussed putting some of the best letters together, but it is a lot of work, Reg my Petal.  Maybe it will be something for me to do when I retire.  I’ll let you know and autograph that first copy just for you.  Of course the first copy will be more expensive than the others, so in true fashion for these parts, there will be around 1,000 first copies (just like the third 50 percent share of many bars)!