The standard bar-girl repartee

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Dear Hillary,

Can you help please.  Do all Thai people ask you the most personal questions?  Things like “How much money you make?  You married yet?  Why not?  You got girlfriend?  You want me to go with you?”  Apart from the fact that this is considered a very rude way of starting a relationship in the UK, I also find it very embarrassing when I am over here.  How do I get these people to stop doing this?  You seem to have the answers for everyone else, so I hope you have some for me too.

Shy and Retiring

Dear Shy and Retiring,

Or is that Shy and Retired?  You have to look at where are these women who ask such direct questions.  My bet is in a bar somewhere.  Those are bar-girl questions expressed while playing a game of Connect 4 (to see if they can arrange a ‘connect 2’ later in the evening.  Bar-girls are not in the habit of issuing a gilt edged invitation to dinner, hand inscribed in Ye Olde English.  Be real and be thankful that ‘these people’ as you call them are interested enough in you to even ask questions.  There’s only one thing worse than being a wall-flower at parties, and that’s not being asked at all.  In actual fact, my turtledove, those inquiries are very cleverly designed “standard” bar girl questions to see if you are worthwhile bothering with at all.  If you have no money, all interest will be lost immediately.  Likewise if you are married they will want to know if “You marry Thai?” or whether your partner is waiting faithfully for you back home in the UK (or America – see letter above yours), while you contemplate the unfaithful ideas.  Lighten up and when you are asked next time just say, “No money.  Wife take all money to boy bar,” and then laugh a lot.  They’ll get the message and you will be left happily lonely, then you can write me letters asking why does nobody talk to you!