Response for “Hello sexy man”

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Dear Hillary,

I have a reply for the chap calling himself “Hello Sexy Man” and having a problem with the local “ladies”.  This is important so pay attention dear fellow.  How are you “carrying yourself and attiring yourself?”  Now, if you were me and it was a full sun afternoon you would be wearing a brimmed hat to keep the sun off, long sleeved shirts and pants because in Thai society this attire is expected when you are not directly in the beach areas.  At night you can forget the hat.  The short version is if you are dressed otherwise you are wearing a badge reading: “Here I am come and take advantage of me.”  On the rare occasions that I have women howl anyway despite my “appropriate dress” I have simply “wai-ed them” and greeted them in Thai and they have wai-ed me back (as a group) and remained silent and embarrassed for having made a fuss over a man who is not available (or desiring) to purchase their time, but who respects their traditions of greeting and expects to be treated as the “elder” I am.

Robert

 

Dear “Elderly” Robert,

I did not know there were any proper gentlemen left in Pattaya, but at least I know how to recognize you – by the hat and being the only farang not in cargo pants.  I get the feeling, reading your email again, that you are definitely not a “sexy man”, so I think the women howling at you could be considered a definite mistake, my Petal.  Forgive them.  Question: do you use a stick as well, with the hat and dark glasses?  If so, I have seen you at the plaza.