Move over Oprah

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Dear Hillary,

I enjoy your bits each week and the advice is right on, too. Somebody wrote in a few weeks back that you should get a raise from your editor and I reckon so too. You are doing a public service so you should get the top dollar. All the ones in the US like Oprah get big money, so should you. Keep up the good work.

Hugh

Dear Hugh,

Aren’t you just the nicest man! Comparing poor little Hillary with the mighty Oprah! However there are some differences between us, you know. She’s in America, for one! You worry me though, when you say you “enjoy my bits” each week. What “bits” are we talking about here? Some of my bits are never discussed here in the column. This is a family newspaper Hugh. As far as a raise is concerned, I’ll show your letter to the editor, but he’ll just laugh and say I made it up.