I know that my Thai GF is seeing other people when I am away on business

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Dear Hillary,

I know that my Thai GF is seeing other people when I am away on business (I have to work offshore for three weeks out of four), even though she denies it.  My friends have seen her in the bar when she doesn’t know and they tell me what’s going down.  Even though this isn’t what I want, I am not paying her a salary or anything, so she’s a free agent I suppose.  Do you think I should do something to tie her down a bit, or will this have the wrong effect?  I like her a lot, fun to be with, but it’s only for one week a month, so I think maybe it’s not worth going down the road any further.  I’m just not sure.

Jim

Dear Jim,

I think you really know the answer to this already, my Petal, and you are just looking to me to back up your decision.  This girl works in the bar, so her job is to make men happy, and really is just someone who is “fun to be with” from your point of view.  That’s what her job is, Jim.  To be fun to be with, and that goes for four weeks out of four, not one week out of four.  Offering her a salary to stop working will not work.  She has the potential to make much more than the average “salary” that most men offer, so why should she take it?  And for that matter, what is she going to do for the three weeks out of four that you are away working?  Go to the excitement of the village up-country?  Would you trade the bright lights, the lady drinks and the endless supply of men with money to burn for planting rice for 150 baht a day?  Of course you wouldn’t.  Keep this girl as a friendly familiar face during your week’s furlough.  Neither of you is in the position to go any further.  Forget about tying her down.  That does not work with Thai ladies who tend to be free spirits, especially when men are offering them free spirits!