Although as you stated prostitution has been around for ever, but it was bought (sic) to light in the 19th century by an American Widow who went to Siam as a Nanny to the Royal Household.
Named Anna (Deborah Kerr) she soon attracted the attention of King Yul and taught him a few new dance steps, all the rage in America.
King Yul was so overcome that he set her up in her own condo and showered her with gifts. Legend has it that when the word of this spread to Issan and Loas (sic) all the young women ventured out to seek their own Prince Charming.
The years rolled on and one night at Kings Cross a young Tasmanian girl (Mary Donaldson, a commoner) happened to be in a Sydney night club when she met a guy named Fred (Prince Frederik of Denmark) out for the night with the boys. Fred fell into the same trap as King Yul and set Princess Mary up in a palace in Denmark.
So if Anna and Mary can hit the jackpot, why not Nid, Lek or Malee? The Thai girls know it is a dark swamp they must enter with lots of pitfalls such as snakes frogs and pimps but it is a chance they must take to support their families and keep the Buffalo healthy. (PS, Tasmania would be Australia’s Issan.)
Just where did you get that drivel from? Watching re-runs of The King and I on CNN? Anna Leonowens (played by Ms Kerr in the fictionalized movie) had a very small part to play in the Royal Household of King Mongkut (played by Yul Brynner). She was not “set up in a condo”. Her book has been shown to be a complete make believe. Try Google as a source.
The romance of Prince Frederik and Princess Mary is a modern day fairy tale, and it could be argued that she struck it lucky. I prefer to think they fell madly in love.
And finally, Tasmania is Australia’s Issan? Just how did you come up with that? Please brush up on your spelling and facts, before you bombard me again!
Being one who knows which fork to use and is conversant with good manners. Can you clear up a problem for me? It’s to do with fish and chips. The better part of the farang population here would not know what a “Fish Knife” is so we leave that one alone.
It’s to do with “Tartare Sauce” served with fish. My sainted Mam told me it should be either poured over the fish or poured on your plate and the fish is dipped in it.
This week I was at my usual 3 star eatery and I noticed a man with an English accent placing the fish on his fork and then dipping it in the minute tartare dish. Much to the raised eyebrows of the laundry maid as more went on the table cloth then on his fish.
Come up with the right answer and I’ll send you a bottle of Mc Williams Brown Muscat and a melted Kit Kat, as I value your advice.
Dear Aussie Bill,
You are a sweet man, and how could I ever say that anyone’s mother was wrong! However, the similar concept runs with butter and butter knives. You don’t dip the bread in the butter, you scoop enough from the butter dish and place that on your plate. From there, you butter your bread/bun or whatever. And so it be with tartare sauce. It should be served in a small gravy boat and poured either on the fish, or better, on the plate, and small amounts placed on the fish before being sent to the mouth.
The Muscat sounds nice, Petal. The melted Kit Kat does not!
In many of the bars and clubs (and I don’t mean the ‘gay’ ones), when you go to the Gentleman’s toilet there will be an attendant standing there. Just when you’re about to relax the old bladder muscle, some of these chaps will quietly come up behind you and give you a back and neck massage while you are at the urinal, and I just do not like this at all. The majority of my male friends I talk to feel the same, so why do the owners continue to let this happen? There are some clubs I have stopped going to because of this attendant thing. What’s your advice, Hillary?
Dear (another) Willy,
You are asking the wrong person, Willy. This problem is one that I have absolutely no direct understanding of, my Petal, I can only guess. I haven’t even peeked around the door of any gentleman’s toilet! Us girls do it sitting down, if you didn’t know. As far as what to do? I am sure a simple “Mai ow, khrap” (no thank you) would be enough. If that doesn’t work you can always pee on his foot, rather than on your own, as it seems to be at present!
I am a single, mature English lady who has lived in Pattaya for 3 months. My question is, why is it that you don’t see white ladies out with young Thai men? There are lots of old white men out with their Thai ladies but not the other way round. I know you can visit male go-go bars and get a handsome man for the evening but where do white ladies take their handsome Thai men? I would love to take a handsome Thai man out for a meal, a drink and dancing, and I’m sure there must be plenty of ladies like myself who would love to do this also, so how do I do it?
Dear Perplexed (of Pattaya),
Goodness me, my Petal, just where in England are you from? Some strange little village where the height of excitement is the Maypole dances, and that’s only once a year? What is stopping you taking your handsome Thai man anywhere? In some areas a white English lady would be looked upon as a bit of a prize, just like the trophy wives the English males have. I think you have some sort of psychological hang-up, and it is you who is afraid to be seen with a Thai man, not the other way round. Be brave, and let me know what happened after you took the public plunge! I am quite sure nobody will have thrown nasturtiums, or even aspersions.
Last year I came over to Thailand for a holiday, and despite all the warnings, I bought a condominium for a girl and each month I would send her money (so she didn’t have to go back to the bar). Last month I found a supposed friend of mine from the UK staying in the condo with her. He was paying her too it turned out. Is it always like this?
It takes two to tango, and while you are bitter about your girlfriend, you should be more annoyed with the “friend” who betrayed you. I think it’s high time you selected both your men friends and your girlfriends more carefully. The local girls who work in bars live by their wits. Don’t forget that, Petal.
After saving for three years, I have been on an extended holiday here in Thailand for the past six weeks and will be going back home in two weeks time. I have had a delightful guide and non-complaining companion who I found in a bar in Pattaya who has been with me for all that time, and I have looked after her well in return including a weekly allowance of 15,000 baht for her to spend on anything she wants. I would like to give her something when I leave for her to remember me by, and want you to suggest something that she will like. Please keep the suggestions within a reasonable budget. I am not a Cheap Charlie but it is the end of my holidays.
What do you really expect me to say, my Petal? Why not buy her a house, a motorcycle and a year’s free veterinary bills for the family buffalo? You’ll be able to get all that for under five million. And since you don’t want to appear as a Cheap Charlie, throw in a house for Mamma and Papa as well. That’s another 800,000 baht as houses are cheap up-country. Come down from the clouds, you have had the services of a ‘mia chow’ (rented wife) for the past six weeks, for which you have already paid 60,000 baht a month which is well above the going rate. She will remember you by whatever you have bought her until it has been converted into folding currency (“He was the nice farang man who bought me this gold chain which I am now taking back to the gold shop”). Spend your money on yourself.
The other night in the bar we had a discussion whether Thai females are romantic. I say that they are, but my drinking buddies all say not. They said that all they are interested in are large amounts of gold, and the larger the better. Surely there are still some gals out there who appreciate roses and chocolates (apart from you, Hillary)? I need you to back me up here, Hillary.
Chocolates and roses are nice, Petal, but I prefer champagne and chocs. Of course there are romantic ladies left in Thailand, other than myself. It sounds to me as if your drinking buddies are looking for ladies from the wrong watering holes. The professional ladies who come to the surface with the buffalos in tow are certainly only looking for gold. That is their business, their profession (and an old one at that). However, by looking in the universities, offices and even department stores, you will find ladies who appreciate being appreciated. You are correct, Robert. Your friends are taking too narrow a sample to base their findings. You don’t have rose colored glasses. Your drinking buddies are looking at life through beer glasses.
So much talk about giving ladies money. I don’t give them money; let me explain: These bulls are on a hill overlooking a meadow full of lovely cows. A young bull says to the others “I’m going down and get me a cow!” Soon, another bull says, “Hey there is a lot of cows down there, I going too!” A young bull says to the old bull, “Aren’t you going down there?” The old bull answers “Nope, if you’re a good bull, they’ll bring it to you.” Lesson learned.
Regarding lady salaries. I was blasted by a ‘Thai Mark’ as well as Hillary. Uh, a ‘Thai mark’ is someone destined to be relieved of their money. See ‘mark’ in a definition for explanation. Also, perhaps ‘TM’ is a missing child who is mad at me. I have been here in Pville for 25 years and can’t keep track of all of em’. Hillary ol’ girl; I have been to the PM several times and have contributed to various columns ever since I first met Peter M 22 years ago. I still think you are the English lad there although you have slipped up and implied that you are indeed Thai. I am the guy who has a striking resemblance to Paul Newman. Champagne dreams and chocolate kisses to you-ol’ girl?
I can assure you, my Petal, I am not the “English lad there.” I can also assure you that I will not be dreaming about a Paul Newman, blue eyed lookalike. And as regards your bull story, I think it really is a load of “bull”. Get back to the 7-eleven footpath and the bottle of Singha, there’s a good chap!
Nice young thing I see in the center, so I suggested we have lunch together next week. Chuffed that she accepted, especially as I must be twice her age. Since it is the first “date” if you like, would it be OK to take her to the center food court? I don’t feel like a slap up lunch if she might say “No” to any further lunches. What do you think, Hillary? You know the Thai woman’s mind, I don’t.
Just what do you want me to do, Petal? Hold your hand and wipe your bott-bott as well? Come on! You don’t need to be an Einstein to know that she would expect a little better than the Flying Vegetable restaurant from someone twice her age. You also come across as someone more than a little “keeniow” Jeff. But don’t let me put you off, go and have a lovely lunch and then take her to any bar beer with balloons. You’ll be amongst friends!
Do you have any influence in City Hall? The situation with all these tour busses has now reached crazy Bangkok proportions. Sukhumvit Road was blocked with busses in both directions on Friday night. Then when they try and get round some of the corners in the small sois they bank up the traffic for blocks. If city hall thinks tourists like sitting for hours on a bus and going nowhere, they should try sitting in a bus with them. Wake up TAT as well.
A good idea will be to get rid of policeman at intersections who keep the traffic going in one direction for 10 minutes, by which time the cross traffic is getting really cross! The police would be better used keeping cars from clogging up the intersections. They must do something soon or Pattaya won’t be a tourist “hub” much longer.
I agree with you. The traffic is now getting really bad, and tourists will very soon get the word out that two days in Pattaya means 24 hours in a bus. Sorry but I haven’t got any influence in city hall or TAT, but get any of your Thai friends to speak to the people in power. That way the message might get to the top. Lots of luck!